


Of Temptation and Despair

by Int0_the_star_fire5



Category: Vampire Knight
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-14 18:55:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 74,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7186019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Int0_the_star_fire5/pseuds/Int0_the_star_fire5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>About a year after the defeat of Rido the existence of vampires became known to the humans forcing Kaname to be the face of vampires in the media. Kaname and Yuki have been away from the academy for nearly five years now, traveling, attempting to smooth vampire/human relations. Kaname feels it his duty to help ease this transition into what he calls “the age of vampires” since he is the head of vampire kind. Yuki, tired of the media frenzy, creates a plan to go back to the academy. Kaname does not like this idea. Yuki convinces Kaname that if only they can perfect what Cross Academy is supposed to stand for they can use it as a prototype to recreate it on an international level. He agrees to letting her return on the condition that she take Hanabusa Aido and Ruka Souen with her at all times. She reluctantly agrees and so for the first time in nearly five years she returns to the Academy. Headmaster Kaien Cross never changes. He greets her with the same zeal he always did. Zero stands still in the background and Yuki remembers the promise they made each other only five years ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

A/N- Okay. So this is my first ever anime fic. I just binge watched the crap out of Vampire Knight and absolutely loved it. Loved it so much that I am re-watching it as I write this. I loved the dynamics between Zero and Yuki so much I just couldn't resist writing a fic about them. 

This story starts up five years after the battle at the academy against Rido and the Level E army. Vampires have stepped out of the shadows and into the history books. Kaname is the face of vampire-kind, a politician, bit of an arrogant ass-hat, and Yuki's husband among other things. You'll get a lot of insight into how the life of politics has treated Yuki and carved her into a new woman, unfamiliar to Zero. I hope you enjoy it! 

CHAPTER ONE

Hanabusa exited the plane before I did, insisting on getting all the way to the bottom of the steps before allowing me to exit. Ruka brought up the rear. The last four years have been hell on all the vampires, particularly Ruka and Hanabusa. For the most part they have acted as my own personal guard at the insistence of Kaname, of course. No one who has ever guarded me would tell you it is an easy job. I didn't envy them. It wasn't until Hanabusa went to get the car that I saw the first flash of a camera. Air port security flooded in as if that one lone camera had summoned them. Since vampires had come into the lime light the figureheads of governments nearly all across the world had agreed that it was in their best interest to make sure us vampires came under as little harm as possible. No one wanted to be the one responsible for a blood feud or anything of the like. In the time it took security to make a human wall of flesh in front of me the press had already begun pushing in against them. Ruka spun me so that the cameras could only see my back and then she stood, back against mine, facing the crowd. Come on, Hanabusa! I thought furiously at him to hurry the hell up. I hated this shit! It was why I had wanted to get away so badly. 

“Mrs. Kuran, is it true that Mr. Kuran is negotiating a vampire civil rights amendment with the Prime Minister of Russia?” 

“With all the recent threats against your lives, why are you and Mr. Kuran parting ways for the first time in four years? Why now?” This was the question that changed the tide from political to personal.

“Are you and Mr. Kuran splitting up?” The cameras exploded and a flurry of questions were screamed at me. Great. 

“What's it like to be Mrs. Kuran?” If you idiots would live your own life maybe mine wouldn't suck so bad! I wanted to yell at them but dared not respond. I had learned really quickly in the past four years how anything you do or say in front of the media, no matter how small, will always be misconstrued when you read it in the morning tabloids. As a result I'd gotten really good at simply giving them nothing. No answers, no facial expressions...nothing. Anything would do, but if I could help it they would get nothing from me. 

“How is he in bed?” Heard that one before.

“Is vampire sex better than sex with a human?” I wouldn't actually know the answer to that question. I'd never had sex with a human. 

“How big is he?” The questions got more and more perversely personal and I did my best to ignore them all. There was one women, fighting her way to the front to be heard above the rest, the same woman who had been all about the politics.

“There is a rumor floating around that you and Mr. Kuran are using sex to smooth over vampire/human relations. Can you either confirm or deny this?” I shook my head and smiled into my hand, trying my best to hide from the cameras. The rumor mill was such an odd creature. 

“Have you any idea how seriously this accusation could damage your image as influential politicians?” My smile slipped away in the shadow of my growing anger. Hanabusa really needed to get me out of here. Ms. Insistent had finally pushed her way to the front so that she was pressed nearly full length against one of the security officers. 

“Fine. You won't answer my political questions. How about telling us whether it's true that you're back in Japan to visit a high school lover?” I hadn't paid enough attention to her, so she was getting bitchy. Figures. I couldn't stop the quick skip of my heart and fought to keep my face blank. The only thing that might have given me away is the long blink I couldn't prevent. If the cameras could have seen, even that might have been enough. “Are you cheating on Mr. Kuran, Mrs. Kuran?” She put a little too much emphasis on the Mrs. The crowd exploded with questions in unison with their flashbulbs and microphones popping up around the security wall like mushrooms after the rain. I cursed her under my breath. I could already see the headlines. My PR agent was going to flip her shit. Ruka's phone rang and she picked it up. 

“Hurry...I don't care what you have to do, Hanabusa...Just get here...” She cursed vehemently. “Fuck...get here now!” She twirled me in against her so that her body shielded mine and began moving us quickly away from the crowd that had grown so violent that one of the security officers was down on the ground. I smelled the blood but Ruka kept us moving too fast for me to see much of anything else. We were running, fast but awkwardly as Ruka forced my body to stay huddled in the center of hers so that I was as small a target as I could get. A black Escalade screeched to a halt in front of us. Ruka rotated us so that her side connected with the side of the car. We had been moving too fast for her to stop on a dime, not while half carrying me at least. Hanabusa kicked open the door.

“Get in, get in get in! Hurry up, they're coming!” Not two hundred feet behind him was a mob of press about to swarm like locusts over us. I dove in the open door while Hanabusa jumped back behind the wheel. Ruka slammed the door as he gunned it and both of us were thrown against the seat as the car accelerated. There was yet another crowd of locusts at the gate. I waited for the car to slow down but when I felt it jerk forward I grabbed onto the front seat and pulled myself forward so I could see the side of Hanabusa's face. 

“What are you doing?” I half yelled. 

“I'm not stopping.”

“Hanabusa, if you kill them our whole campaign will be shot to shit! You have to stop.” He shook his head. 

“I made the mistake of stopping before. They swarmed the car, thinking you were already inside it. That's why it took me so long to get to you.” Ruka put her hand on his shoulder and his eyes flicked briefly towards her in the mirror before he focused back on the quickly disappearing tarmac. 

“Hanabusa-” He shook his head.

“No, Ruka. I will not suffer the wrath of Lord Kaname for this.” he gripped the wheel a little more solidly. “I'm not stopping.” Ruka stared at him for a moment. 

“Buckle up, Lady Yuki.” Ruka said to me while staring at Busa. 

“Hanabusa, you must stop!” Ruka grabbed my upper arms and pushed me, not violently but still forcefully, back into the seat. 

“They will move. Now buckle your seat belt, Yuki.” I glared at her before buckling myself in. She slumped a little in relief. 

“You too, Ruka.” I said. She buckled in and we both watched the crowd loom closer and closer. 

“Ruka?” I nearly growled out

“Yeah?” Hanabusa began laying on the horn. 

“Move! Get out the way!” He yelled, waving his arms like they could see him as we sped toward them. My heart raced as individual details of the people in our way became more clear. 

“They had better fucking move.” My voice was quiet, squeezed tight with too much emotion. Ruka looked at me, a laugh escaping her, more from the pressure of the moment than humor. I thought they wouldn't move but at the last second the crowd parted like a curtain. They had finally realized we weren't stopping. One photographer stood his ground a little too close to the path of the car, snapping photos of us speeding towards him. Hanabusa swore loudly as he swerved just in time, narrowly missing the man. I took a huge lungful of air in relief, realizing only then how long I'd been holding my breath, expecting the impact. The car wove in and out of traffic in maneuvers one would be hard pressed to classify as legal. We screeched to a halt inside a garage and poured from the car to the waiting Olive green SUV. We were back on the road, the full switch taking all of forty seconds. Back in the beginning of all this, when Kaname first became the face of Vampires I might have spent the rest of the drive to the academy scolding Ruka and Hanabusa for all the ridiculous shenanigans. Now I just sat quietly in the back seat watching the human world blur through the too-tinted glass and wondered, not for the first time, if Zero would try to fulfill the promise he made me when I chose Kaname over him. 

“The next time I see you, I'll kill you.” Tears stung my eyes. We'll see, Zero. We shall see. 

...A short while later at the Academy...

I hesitated just outside the closed office door of Headmaster Cross, taking a breath so deep my chest shuddered, and I still felt like I was suffocating. I held that breath as I reached for the door. My fingers had just wrapped around the knob when it twisted and the door whooshed open revealing Headmaster Kaien Cross. His blonde hair was loose, framing the fine, handsome lines of a face that looked half the age I knew it to be. 

“YUKI!” Tears filled his eyes and the first one spilled over as he yanked me into his arms. His embrace was crushing, more so then usual. That staticky pressure began to fill my head and my eyes tingled from his intense embrace squeezing the air out of me. “You've come back home to me!” I gasped in a breath.

“Can't...breathe...” I gasped out. He chuckled and loosened his hold on me, but held me still. I took a couple quick lungfuls of air and finally wrapped my arms around his narrow waist, returning the hug. I allowed myself to relax into his arms, closing my eyes and simply enjoying being close to him again. 

I had missed him much more than I thought. I hadn't really let myself dwell on what had happened my last semester at this academy. No, I'd boxed it away and tried to live this new life of blinding lights, passive smiles and forgotten nights. This was not a life I'd ever wanted. I held the man I knew as father close for the first time in nearly five years and let myself remember again. For the first time ever he was the first to attempt to break the embrace. When I held onto him, obviously showing no intention of moving I felt a fine tension thrum through his body. He slowly wrapped his arms around me again. 

“Yuki?” There was no humor, just concern, fear and something like anger. I shook my head and pulled back, moving around him to flop in one of the two new chairs in front of his desk. 

“Are you okay?” I smiled and leaned back so that my head rested against the rounded, top of the chair. My eyes were sliding shut.

“I'm great. I guess I just missed you much more than I let myself realize. And all this excitement has me-” His hands wrapped around my shoulders, pinning my arms to my sides as he wrapped his arms around me, lifting me completely clear of the chair. 

“Oh, Yuki! I missed you too!” I nodded as much as I could and fought to push the flat of my arms between us, prying my chest away from him enough to take a few deep breaths. I shoved at him a little.

“I can't breathe!” His laughter made his eyes gleam and he let me go so abruptly I stumbled back a step, bumping into the chair I had been in. His hand was just there, a firm hold around my wrist, stopping me from falling back onto the chair. He moved so that he was sitting on the top of his desk. 

“You haven't changed much.” His voice thick with the afterglow of all that laughter. I couldn't help but smile. Oh, I had changed in many ways, some of which he would not like in the slightest. But I smiled to hide that and let him believe I was the same person I had once been. 

“Neither have you, head-” I stopped, seeing his face fall into that so cute frown, he was absolutely adorable when he looked like that. “Father.” I finished. His face lit up, smile so wide I found myself smiling along with him. He'd always been able to simply smile and I couldn't help but do the same. I laughed. Oh how I'd missed him. He settled onto the desk, crossing his legs under him. 

“Now, Yuki, we have many things to discuss.” I nodded, the humor fading away. 

“Indeed, we do. Let's start with why I'm here.”

“I know why you're here.” I cocked my head with a raised eyebrow as if saying oh? “Lord Kaname called me while you were en route and told me that he was sending you as his other half to see if you could perfect the school and what it stands for. If it is successful he said you proposed to build similar schools on an international scale in an attempt to better vampire/human relations.” I nodded.

“That's correct.” He stared at me as if he were tasting the truth of my words and it was a bitter flavor. 

“That's truly why you came back here?” I raised an eyebrow and nodded once. 

“Yes.” He shook his head, shoulders rounding as he slouched in upon himself. 

“And what of Zero?” I felt my eyes widen and my breathing quicken at the mention of his name. I hadn't expected this topic to be broached so soon. I forced my face back into the neutrality I had perfected in the last five years. 

“What of him?” My voice sounded as bland as I'm sure my face looked. His head snapped up and for the first time in a very long while I saw real anger in his eyes. 

“Don't be so callous, Yuki. I don't think I need remind you of the promise he made you before you left.” I stared calmly at him as my stomach began dropping into my feet. “I am glad to see you, believe me I am more than ecstatic to finally see my daughter again.”

“I remember it just fine.” The words carried just a hint of heat to them and I forced myself to take a deep, supposedly calming breath. 

“Then why are you here?”

“You already know.” He slammed the palm of his left hand into the desk top hard enough that the wood groaned in protest. 

“Why are you really here?” His voice betrayed none of the anger burning in his eyes. It was an impressive display of self restraint that not even I was capable of. Once you could see the anger in my eyes it was sure to be reflected in everything else. I stared calmly at him as if he hadn't asked me a thing. I wasn't sure what he wanted to hear but whatever it was he clearly wasn't getting it. “Why would you put Zero, put me in this position, Yuki? I didn't think you'd risk coming back here for anything short of desperate measures. You want him to kill you?” He was pissed now, voice trembling with all that emotion. 

“Of course not.” My voice still sounded calm, I'd pat myself on the back for that later, but my stomach was twisting like a serpentine vice. 

“You think he won't keep his word.” No question, just a statement. I couldn't keep myself from looking away. I spoke to him while analyzing the turquoise curtains hanging over the tall window.

“In truth I thought that maybe-”

“Maybe, what? Maybe he loves you enough that he is unable to kill you?” I swallowed hard and nodded. That was exactly what I thought. I stopped lying to myself a long time ago about my feelings for Zero. I loved him. I loved him too much to ever fulfill a promise like the one he made me. It might have been incredibly naive to think he loved me the same, but life is all about chances, circumstance and personal decisions, right? I was taking a leap of faith here and hoping something saved me before I had a rude meet and greet with the jagged rock bottom. He scoffed and slid off the desk, walking away from me to look out the window. 

“Did you ever consider what might happen if Zero does try to kill you?” I shrugged, not that he could see it.

“I won't let him kill me. If he does try to do just that I plan on fighting back.” I watched all that blonde hair swish across the tops of his shoulders as he shook his head again. 

“But you won't be able to kill him, Yuki. I don't think you have it in you to kill someone you love.” In truth I didn't think so either. You could only defend your life from someone if you were willing to take theirs in return. I didn't think I'd ever be ready for that. Then again, I'd done countless things in the last five years that I never would have fathomed possible.

“I am capable of a lot more than you think.” He whirled around and I flinched back a little at the pure rage on his face. 

“Dammit, Yuki! This isn't a game!” I stood up, finally angry enough that my fingers trembled with the rush of it. 

“No it's not. Not everything is about, Zero, Headmaster. Perfecting this school and what it stands for could change the face of vampire/human relations. It is something I feel must be done.”

“Then let Kaname do it!”

“Why? Why should he have to do everything, huh? I just stand around and look pretty, make his image even more socially flawless. Did you know that a man who is married is more socially accepted in politics?” I waited until he nodded before continuing. “Why can't I handle something for once?” He stared at me for a long minute while I took several deep breaths, attempting to win back my composure. 

It did make me mad to be the ornament decorating Kaname's arm. The pretty face that when paired with his made him look like the perfect politician. He was the mouthpiece, the figurehead. I was a prop to be played with to optimum advantage. Fuck that. I was tired of being carted from country to country, city to city, facing the endless hoard of media, anywhere we went. He got all the attention whenever we were together, but the second I was alone the media swarmed, poking and prodding at the quiet prop, trying to get me to squeak, give them anything they could use. Despite perfecting my stone face, they still kept at it. It made my lonely explorations of endless foreign cities a game of hide and seek, me versus a tide of cameras and microphones.

“You couldn't have handled something else?” I scoffed and flopped back in the chair. I closed my eyes and counted to twenty. It was a long twenty because the silence stretched between us, more tense than it had ever been. 

“Why can't I have just missed my family? Is that not good enough an excuse?” He harrumphed at that.

“Not when half of your said family is going to attempt to kill you. Is your political ambition worth your life, Yuki?” I smiled at his complete ignorance. I couldn't give a fuck about politics. It was a game I was nearly homicidally fed up with. The politics of being here was a cover. No. My political ambition wasn't enough to get me killed, I had none. Kaname's ambition however, was enough to drive me to homicide, at the high end of the spectrum, suicide, on the low end. Four years of this shit and I was ready to lose my fucking mind. 

“No it is not.” He made a triumphant noise. “But love is.” The room was so silent I could hear him breathing, hear his heart playing skip-bo against his ribs. I opened my eyes to see him propping himself up against the wall. “If we can't die for love, tell me, what can we die for?” His eyes filled with tears but not a single one broke free. He nodded and turned away to look back out the window, shoulders rounded so that he could hug his arms around his stomach. My heart clenched at seeing him like this but I didn't regret my decision to come back. Not yet. I stood and made my way to the door, unable to watch him hug himself, knowing he was probably crying. I froze, the door just barely cracked as he finally spoke. 

“Let me just ask you one question. If Zero does kill you, what do you think he'll then do to himself?” I fought to pull in my next lungful of air past my throbbing lump in the back of my throat, eyes stinging with tears. It hurt too much to think about that. “You might not care about your life, but what about Zero's?” If I was wrong and Zero didn't love me as much as his hatred for vampires I wouldn't be the only one who would lose. I ignored the question's and asked one of my own. 

“I'm going to assume that while I'm on campus you, like Kaname, will insist on a near constant guard on me?” 

“Lord Kaname did express such concerns. And he is right to insist on such things. The academy will be wild with news of Lady Kuran living among us.” I frowned, turning to face him. It sounded like their was a but coming.

“But?” I prompted. 

“But what?” his voice was as flat as mine had begun. 

“You said Kaname insisted on the guard, but that didn't answer my question.” He was absolutely still. “You won't insist on the guard, will you.” He was so still I thought he might disappear if I weren't looking right at him. 

“You are no longer a child and, as much as I hate the concept, there are things you will need to do that do not require an audience. No. I will not insist on any guard. There are none here on campus that could adequately defend you, anyway. However, I will not, nor can I, say anything about the vampire guards he insisted you bring with you. They are an issue I leave entirely up to you to contend with.” I nodded, more to myself than anything.

“What will you tell Kaname if he asks about extra guard?”

“The campus is under more threat from the outside world now, than it has ever been. I'm sure as one of the leading international politicians I don't need to regale you with tales of the horrors that came with the unveiling.” That is what the human media called us vampires coming out from under the bed. The unveiling. I couldn't dispute the terminology, but somehow I always smiled at hearing it. 

“No you don't.” The unveiling brought both a huge cry of support from the masses as well as kick-starting the vampire hunter revolution. The Vampire hunters numbers nearly quadrupled in the four years we'd gone public. They killed in shadows, as they had always done. The legal system was a little uncertain if it was illegal to kill vampires yet, so in the eyes of law enforcement vampire hunters were vigilantes at worst, heroes at best. Then there was the wannabe vampire hunters, who were, sloppy and poorly trained cannon fodder that kept endlessly proving to be a PR disaster. It's hard to make people see you as anything but a monster if your people are leaving a trail of bodies behind them, even if it's in defense of your own life. We were on the brink of all-out war with vampire hunters in the shadows while trying to maintain a pleasant smile for the dazzle of the human cameras. 

“I have upped the campus security. The Security committee acts like campus security now, the numbers in the low twenties. I have hired vampires to guard the barrier to the school as an extra precaution. I will simply tell Kaname the guards I have are protecting the school, considering the circumstances, and even if I had them to spare, I employ none to which I would entrust your life.”

“And if he decides to send more guards to me?” He turned just enough so I could see the beginnings of his profile. 

“Like I said before, you're a big girl, I'm sure you can contend with your husband's guard choices on your own.” I stared at that sliver of profile for a moment before nodding. I turned back to the door, opening it so that I stood framed in the dim, hallway lighting. I paused there.

“Good night, father.” He didn't respond so I stepped through the door and closed it behind me.

“Good night, Yuki.” I heard his mumbled words through the door and smiled as I began making my way down the hallway. I'd managed to convince Busa and Ruka to let me talk to the headmaster alone so I got to walk back with nothing but me, myself and I chasing each other through my mind. Alone, with just my thoughts, I suddenly couldn't wait to get back to the room. 

...Nearly a week later...

I had been at the academy for almost a week and still had yet to see Zero. I was beginning to think he might be avoiding me. The schools first dance of the school year was approaching and I was about to pass out from exhaustion. Kaname had made our image, yes, our image, into a bit of a publicity slut. He was always ensuring that we were reaching out to the community, making sure the cameras caught every good deed. “It's good PR.” He'd say. I had quickly caught on and allowed myself to be washed, brushed, painted and primped for any and every event that might provide even the slightest image boost. Now here I was, volunteering myself to dance among the students at the academy. I had learned 4 new dances in as many days, so as not to make a fool of myself by not knowing any of them when the time came. The greatest part was that Kaname had insisted that Hanabusa and Ruka join me in this dance endeavor so that none of us seemed unapproachable. So, my mighty body guards limped behind me, seemingly more exhausted than myself. 

“Ridiculous...” Ruka mumbled for the hundredth time. “We are bodyguards, vampires! Not twerking buddies!” Hanabusa chuckled tiredly but said nothing, unusual for him. It must have been a rougher four days than I'd thought if Busa was giving up a chance to be a smart-ass. 

They walked me to the Headmaster's guest quarters where I was staying, temporarily I am told, until they finish “cleaning up” a room in the dorm originally used for night class students. Hanabusa and Ruka were sharing a room about three doors down from mine, despite the plethora of rooms. They'd told me it was for security purposes so they could both get to me if I needed them. I was just waiting for the peace treaty between them to expire. In such close quarters along with their polar personalities, I doubted it would be long. They left me once the door was closed solidly behind me and all three locks were slammed home. I leaned back against the door and took a deep breath, trying to expel some of the day's tension. I began peeling off layers. When I wore nothing but my underwear I plugged in my alarm clock/ Bose speaker, sliding my phone onto the cradle. After spending so much time in the U.S., since they were both one of the most accepting and tricky to deal with where V/H relations were concerned, I had picked up quite the taste for music genres most people hadn't even heard of. Enigma's “The cross of Changes” came on and I stopped simply to listen to the liquid flow of the instrumental, eyes closing for a minute. Enigma had been a group for a few decades now and until about my fifth venture to the U.S., though they are a German group, I had never known about them. 

I turned the music up so I'd be able to hear it clearly over the shower, which meant it was pretty loud. I didn't care. The headmaster sound proofed almost every room designated for guests and faculty, so no one would be bothered. I moved about my room, taking clothes out of my bag, which was still mostly unpacked. I grabbed my towel and moved toward the bathroom, draping it across the towel rack next to the shower. I turned the water to a near scalding temperature. When I closed the glass shower door it was already fogging up. I turned around and nearly jumped out of my skin. 

Zero stood in the doorway. My heart was a choking lump in the back of my throat, every heartbeat nudging it further up until it filled my mouth. The blood rushing through my veins quickened, laced with an adrenaline high I'd never felt before. I felt light and airy as I watched him watch me. We were alone in a completely soundproofed room locked from the inside. I was nearly naked, weaponless, vulnerable. If ever he was going to kill me, now would be the perfect opportunity. I fought to breathe through the growing fog and my racing heart. Would he kill me? 

I looked him over. His style of dress hadn't changed much. He wore a white button down made of some light-weight material that was thin enough I could see a hint of his skin underneath it, gaping open so that the beginning of his pectoral muscles peeked around the collar like a coy schoolgirl. His pants were the typical black, but they fit his thighs and hips like a second skin, billowing out slightly at the knee to provide the look of looser pants. I was fascinated with the way the chain draped through the belt loops around his hips. A charm dangled down so that it swayed over that precious hollow where hip and thigh met. His silver hair framed his face, falling around his eyes, framing them like the curtain eye lashes wished to be. I was breathing too fast as something clenched inside me, low and hard. I knew that reaction. I shook my head and tried to ignore my body. 

He took a few steps into the bathroom and I fought to simply stay in place. Not to run, either to him or away, it was hell on the nerves to just stand there. I waited for him to say something, do something but he just stared as he stalked, no word would better suit his undoubtedly predatorial gait, closer to me. He was close enough now that I could just barely, not so much hear as feel, his boots on the floor, the vibration of the connection between sole and ground. He stopped half a foot away from me and I couldn't help feeling powerless, breathless, hopeless and hopeful, embarrassed, vulnerable, scared and something I definitely didn't want to think about. I looked up the long length of his body so that I had the courage to meet his eyes when I got there. 

“Did you forget about me?” His voice rumbled through me and I finally met his eyes. I sighed, without meaning to, remembering staring into that gorgeous face day after day. Those eyes, the silver of his hair but twice as mercurial with a splash of lavender, dazzling. 

“Never.” My response was a breathless whisper. He couldn't have heard it. He leaned down to me, hair brushing my cheek. I could smell the soap he used and new no other man would ever perfect the scent the way he did. 

“You've changed...Yuki.” He hesitated on my name, as if it was a surrender of some sort. I nodded, his hair tingling across my cheek as I moved. “Five years and you've nothing to say to me?” I swallowed hard and tried to think. This is not how I imagined meeting Zero again. 

“Why are you so close?” I actually felt his lips whisper across my skin in a light caress as he smiled. He was really close. He took a step closer, our bodies nearly touching, forcing him to stand up to complete the movement. I took a shuddering breath as his lips moved away from the tender flesh of my neck. He tried to move closer to me and I finally took a step back. My body already trembled for him, if we were that close I didn't know what would happen. I didn't think I wanted to be that vulnerable with him right now. I backed up as he moved forward until my back pressed into the warming glass of the shower. He slid his body against mine, pinning me against the glass. I gasped, and looked down as my eyes slid shut for just a moment. 

“Why are you so close, Zero?” I repeated around the pulse in my throat. His body moved away from mine and I was suddenly staring into his eyes from centimeters away. I stopped breathing and couldn't help glancing at the pale pink curl of those lips. He smiled and slid his lips along my jaw until his nose brushed the hollow just behind my ear. 

“Breathe.” He whispered. I shivered and took a breath I forgot I needed. 

“What are you doing, Zero?” My words were nothing but a winded whisper.

“An experiment.” He breathed against my ear. My heart was racing, breath a precious commodity I struggled to obtain. His lips traced lightly up the large vein in my neck and my head moved back on its own to give him more access. I tried to correct that subconscious mistake but his fingers were suddenly against my throat, just under my jaw, holding my head in place, other arm wrapping around my lower back as he pulled my body flush with his, my feet dangling helplessly above the floor. I bit my lower lip, fighting back the moan threatening to break free. I shivered in his arms, one hand finding its way into his hair, so soft and thick as it slid through my fingers. Maybe I did want to be vulnerable for him. I tried to reason with myself, my body. 

I didn't want to reason. I wanted to wrap my legs around his waist as he buried his fangs, and other parts, deep into my body. I nearly bit my lip off trying to keep from moaning. The hard brush of his fangs grazed his favorite biting spot about halfway down my neck. When I had been feeding Zero twice a week he'd bitten into the same spot so often that it was his biting spot. As a result of all those vampire endorphins that spot on my neck was permanently sensitive. My whole body tensed against his, a jolt of pleasure arcing from my neck to pool between my thighs, breath leaving me on a soft moan. All those times he'd held me close as my body sustained him. I wanted it. I wanted that and so much more, right now. Kaname's bite never did even this much to me. The mention of his name startled through me. Oh god. Kaname. I tried to swim back into myself. 

“Zero-” He opened his mouth wide and I froze as the points of his fangs dimpled my flesh. I fought to keep still, to keep my hand buried in his hair from urging him on, to keep my legs dangling where they were. I stopped breathing as he bit down ever so gently. He made a small noise, a breath of sound at the back of his throat and my fingers clenched tighter in his hair, an involuntary response on my part. He paused there, fangs nearly breaking my skin. Just a little more, clamp down just a little more. I wanted that bite, I wanted...What did I want? I fine tremor started in his jaw, I felt it in his teeth on my neck. He wanted to do it. I wanted him to do it. All we needed was a nudge. Wasn't there something I should remember? 

“If-” I had to stop and swallow a few times before I could finish speaking. “If you're going to feed than feed.” I spoke low, trying not to cause him to break skin. I wanted this, but Zero had to as well. I wouldn't have it any other way. His breath scalded my skin in rapid gusts. He was fighting the urge to feed. I felt it in the fine tremble of his body against mine. How long had he been going between feedings? I ran my fingers through his hair. 

“It's okay, Zero.” He started to bite down, my body reacted on its own. I wrapped my arm around his shoulders tighter, the hand in his hair full of silken silver. Pleasure spiked through me in anticipation of what was to come. He was suddenly gone and I fell to my knees, catching myself with a hand on the floor to prevent an ugly face-plant. I crouched on the floor, body thrumming with desire...need. 

Zero was standing next to the door, back plastered to the wall like he would try to push through it. His eyes were a sparkling, rich red. Framed by all that silver it looked like someone had planted two giant garnets in his face and poured the sun through them, while his hair shone like the pale of the moon. Those eyes were all for me, watching me as I stood, running down my body from my eyes down. It was a long look, one that made me want to walk over to him and slake every hunger he had. 

His eyes, when they finally found mine again, were filled with that darkness that fills a mans eyes before he devours you. Did I want what his eyes promised? Oh, hell yes! I'd wanted it for what felt like so long, I'd just never given myself over to it. He shook his head, eyes widening as I stepped forward.

“Stay.” His voice was throaty and a little breathy. I shivered just hearing him speak. His eyes closed as he thumped his head back into the wall, throat convulsing as I watched. He turned to leave and I took a step toward him.

“Don't.” I stopped. 

“Was the experiment a success?” He was quiet for so long I thought he wouldn't answer. He opened the door, and only when he was closing it behind him did he answer.

“No.” He glanced over his shoulder at me, eyes wandering my face for a moment. “Don't worry, Yuki. I won't kill you.” Right before the door clicked closed I heard him say, “Tonight.” 

Only after a few minutes of staring at the closed door where he'd been did I finally move. I wobbled over to the toilet seat and fell onto it as my knees gave. My body was sensitive, thrumming with denied pleasure. I dropped my head into my hands, breathing deeply, trying to still my body. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! What was I doing? I see Zero once, just once, and nearly cheat on Kaname? What the fuck is wrong with me? I wanted him so badly that I forgot everything else. As the music began to filter back into my conscious I realized I had been so intent on Zero that nothing else had existed. I'd heard his voice from across the room over the shower and the music blaring from my phone. 

My legs shivered with a fine tremble as I slipped off what remained of my clothes and finally got my shower. The water was too hot, burning my skin, but I stood under the scalding rain. No mater how hard I scrubbed, how many times I washed my skin or how long I stood under the water, I couldn't wash away the feeling of his body against mine. The smell of his skin, the crisp smell of a fall breeze accented by a hint of something floral, was in my nose and no soap could wash it out. I stepped out of the shower and dried my skin, reddened from the heat, and hair as much as I cared to, which currently wasn't much. The satin of the sheets against my newly sensitized skin was amazing. My nipples hardened instantly where the sheets brushed over them. It was too soon after my encounter with Zero and my body tightened in anticipation of something I'd never have. I forced myself to lay still. To close my eyes and take deep even breaths. My body was still swollen with need, mind racing. I sighed and rolled onto my stomach. It was going to be a long night. 

…...................................................

He grabbed my wrists, pushing my arms up as he pinned my body to the wall, feet dangling inches off the floor. I could feel him pressed in a long, muscled line of heat against the back of me, the cool tile pressed against my front providing a pleasant contrast. His fingers pinned my wrists to the wall, holding me passive. My body warmed for him in ways I had only experienced when I worked myself up. I gasped as he bent his head down and ran his tongue up my neck, shivering in anticipation. 

“Zero-” His fangs bit in and my eyes widened from the intense flash of pain, quickly swept away on the tide of endorphins he was pumping through my system. Vampire saliva carried thousands of pleasure endorphins to pacify their victims with overwhelming pleasure. My muscles loosened, body going limp against his as the endorphins raged through me. My whole body pulsed with pleasure with each draw of his mouth. My breathing was quickening in time with my body. I was suddenly very aware how excited Zero was where he pressed in an incredibly hard line against my lower back. I rotated my hips against him and he moaned a little for me. I moaned as he dug his fangs a little deeper, rolling my hips back against him again. He shoved me forward into the wall a little more, driving forward with his hips, a clear message not to move that left me breathless. I didn't know if I could. Feeding took a long time, despite what the humans love to put on the silver screen. That means that a lot of endorphins were rushing through me, bringing me closer and closer to climax as each wave seemed to run over an unknown pleasure spot deep inside me. 

“Oh...” I gasped out as my world began to narrow down to the building orgasm. I tried to keep my body still against him, tried not to let him know what he was doing to me. The pleasure crested and hesitated, like that hesitation at the peak of a roller coaster right before you hear the break release. The break didn't get that chance today. My feet were suddenly flat on the floor, his body moved away from mine and I had to fight to keep my feet. I fought not to make a sound, not to move a muscle as my body screamed, seized in denial. My legs shook, forcing me to press into the wall harder to stay standing. 

“Did I hurt you?” I shook my head, that was all I could offer in way of response. 

“Don't worry, Yuki.” I frowned through the endorphins.

“What?”

“I won't kill you.” I turned to see him standing there gun pointed at me. My heart dropped into my feet as I saw that cold look in his eyes, my blood still trailing from the corner of his mouth. “Today.” He threw his head back and laughed right before the gun exploded in his hand and the world swam in streamers. 

I sat bolt upright in bed, gasping for breath. 

“Fuck.” I breathed. The satin sheet pooled around my naked body as I stared off into the darkness of my room. What was wrong with me? I was sliding across the bed when I heard a loud bang on the door.

“Lady Yuki?” I sighed and nearly slipped off the edge of the bed trying to get my robe on as I moved. 

“I'm coming, Ruka.” Another bang on the door.

“Lady Yuki, are you alright?” Hanabusa this time. 

“I said-” I froze and laughed at myself. I'd forgotten they couldn't hear me. I padded to the door and shot back the locks, swinging the door open for the two vampires. 

“Come in.” I said. Busa's eyes widened.

“Ah!...Ummm...” He turned around and made cute little awkward noises. I glanced down to see I hadn't fully fastened my robe. There was a pale line of flesh exposed down between my breasts nearly to my belly button. 

“Oh.” I chuckled as I fastened the robe tight. “Sorry, Busa.” Ruka rolled her eyes and strode past me into the room. 

“S'okay.” He mumbled. Hanabusa was acutely uncomfortable around me in various states of undress. I found that particular characteristic utterly endearing about him. I laughed and turned away to find Ruka sitting on the edge of my bed, watching me move across the room. Her eyes were serious, amused and curious. 

“Hanabusa, go get Lady Yuki the letter.” She never looked away from me. 

“Oh! Y-yes! Sure!” He darted off, closing the door firmly behind him in his rush to be anywhere else. 

“Yes, Ruka?” I began gathering clothes for the day as she watched me. 

“You smell like, sex, Yuki.” I paused in grabbing a bra for only a moment, nothing more. “What have you been doing in here while all the whos down in whoville were asnooze in their beds?” Her voice was light with some personal joke. 

“What's funny?” The smile faded from her face. 

“Answer my question, Yuki...please.” The please was an obvious afterthought but still, it got me to answer her question. Sort of. 

“I just had a very...hot dream.” I put a lot of emphasis on hot. When I turned around she was right behind me. She leaned in and sniffed up the side of my neck in a very not-human gesture. I shoved her back, anger kindling to life at the invasion. 

“Hmmmmm...” She licked her lips. “A hot dream about...Zero?” My pulse sped. I fed my anger until I looked at her with a level of rage she hadn't earned. 

“You are not here to question me, Ruka. And the next time you invade my privacy like you just did I will personally punish you.” Her eyes widened a bit. 

“I would never dream of questioning you, Yu- Lady Yuki.” I raised an eyebrow. 

“What do you call this then?” She opened her mouth to say something then closed it. I watched that pretty face narrow down to angry lines as she nodded. 

“Fine. I am here to protect your body, Lady Yuki, not your love life. I will stay out of your personal life until I am necessary.” She strode over to the door, covering the distance from bed to exit in six very angry strides. “I will await you out here.” I sighed and turned to talk to her.

“Ruka-” The door closed with a click of finality, not loud but solid, cutting off my words. “Damn.” I grumbled to myself as I began tugging on clothes. I wished I would have said that differently but I needed no one to know about last night. No one could know. 

It was difficult when you considered your bodyguards to be among your closest friends. Who ever thought mixing the two was a good idea? The line of obligation between friend and boss was a thin, tricky fucker indeed. 

...Two hours, three coffees and one killer headache later...

“The numbers of students in the day class are ever dwindling with Japan's reluctance to recognize vampires as anything but monsters. We need to improve the school's outreach programs.”

“Absolutely not! My students have been put in enough danger as it is. I will not roll out the red carpet for those that would harm them just so you can get some good PR.” This conversation was pissing me off. 

“If you aren't willing to help, headmaster, then why am I here.”

“I don't know, Yuki. Why are you here?” I scoffed and shook my head.

“I will not indulge this ridiculous line of conversation again.”

“You never really 'indulged' it before.” I switched subjects back to the issue at hand. 

“We need this, headmaster.” His face was flushed a bright pink and he hadn't once told me to call him father since we'd begun discussing this issue nearly an hour ago. Yeah. He was pissed. I was just pissing everyone off today.

“No. I won't allow it”

“If we can just reach out to the communities closest to the school, maybe set up some fund-raisers, start up a committee to organize public outreach events-”

“No!” He glared at me, standing in front of the chair he had long since vacated. “I bankrolled nearly the whole construction of this academy from my own pockets. Built all of this on the basis of a dream that vampires and humans could live in peace.”

“I know-” He cut me off. 

“As founder and headmaster of Cross Academy it is my responsibility, my duty, to see that my students are safe.” He shook his head. “I will not succeed. I won't be able to save everyone. Not now or probably ever again.” He paused and took a deep breath. “If I let you do this, you'd be putting a neon target over the academy and if I can't protect my students I'd just as soon send them home.” I sighed and slid down in the chair, pinching the bridge of my nose between thumb and forefinger.

“Then we have one hell of a conundrum on our hands. We have to bolster the numbers of the day class. There are nearly double the night class students than the day class. For this model to work we need much more sufficient numbers, not for them to drop even more.” Zero shifted in his corner, drawing my attention. He'd been propped in the darkest corner of the room, silent the whole time. I'd been attempting to ignore the weight of his gaze on me, succeeding up to this point.

“What do you propose we do?” I yanked my gaze away from him back to the headmaster. I thought for a moment. 

“I think you should lasso a few of your faculty members into doing some quiet telemarketing to potential student candidates. Get some feelers out there to see how many are receptive and how many aren't.” I looked over the shadowed silhouette of Zero. “As for you, Zero, Being the head of the guardians you should search for more vampire muscle. Maybe begin training them up a little better.”

“This is a school of learning, Yuki. Not a military compound.” The headmaster sounded flabbergasted. I glared back at him. 

“The humans know now that they are not the top of the food chain. That scares them. People do crazy shit out of panic and ignorance. You said it yourself, you can't even ensure the safety of your students now. Part of that is because your guardians are lacking in quality and skill. Part of that you can't control. But I may be able to help you gain some ground.”

“What are you going to be doing?” Zero asked.

“The first part to fixing something is realizing it is broken. To do that we have to all be willing to do things we might not want to do.” The headmaster repeated Zero's question, a frown creasing the skin between those pretty eyes. 

“I will begin inserting myself into the world of Japanese politics.” Both men made a noise of disapproval. I glared at them both. “I have to do something to pave the way for the academy. How far do you think we'll get if the government pushes back harder than we can?” The room was dead silent. 

“And you think you can succeed where Kaname has failed?” Zero asked. 

It's true. For all his beauty, charm, grace and intellect Kaname had been incapable of winning over Japanese politicians the way he'd so easily maneuvered countless others. The best he had gotten was a treaty built on the shaky foundations of a handful of scared politicians. And he'd only gotten that because most countries were erring on the side of caution where vampires were concerned. It would be unwise to start a war with creatures you don't even really know how to kill. Did I think I could tame the Japanese government? No. Not really. But I had to try. I didn't really care about politics, never had. However, I couldn't deny that I was a part of the political scene now and if I could change something, especially something like the prospect of settling this feud between human and vampire, then how could I sit back and not? In truth, I really just wanted an excuse to be anywhere Zero couldn't find me, at least not easily. I was suddenly on my feet as a fist smashed down on the table in front of me. The headmaster was staring at me, eyes raging. 

“What do you think you can accomplish, Yuki?” I smiled sweetly and stared into those large eyes the color of rosewater. 

“Anything that doesn't kill me.” He froze, staring blankly as if my simple, incredibly literal statement was too much. 

“This might kill you.” His voice was hushed but clear. I shrugged, a nonchalant roll of muscle as I smiled at his beautiful eyes. 

“So?” I heard Zero shift. If I didn't know better I'd swear he was uncomfortable or something. Nah.

“This isn't a game, Yuki!” He nearly shouted it into my face despite the desk between us.

“Isn't it!” I yelled right back. My chest heaved with the heat I'd thrown in those two words. My anger swirled through me and I knew my eyes would be a red storm to match. “Politics is nothing but devious men on a power trip playing at war and capitalism. The whole thing is one giant fucking monopoly game and wining boils down to materialism and who's tongue is more silken.” I eased back from him and closed my eyes, shoving my anger down. I smiled and knew it didn't reach my eyes before I'd even opened them. 

“A bit cynical, don't ya think?” Zero's voice was smooth, like nothing was happening. I cocked my head to the side as I stared at him. Why was he so calm? Odd.

“No. Not at all.” He was cast mostly in shadow, only the bottom part of his legs visible in the shadows. I stared right about where I thought his face should be. 

“You never answered the headmaster's question.”

“No. I don't suppose I did.” I looked back at the man in question and my face was that very neutral blankness I'd perfected. Pretty, sweet and absolutely clueless. “It's simple really. Politics is mostly men.” His face crumbled in confusion.

“Yes, it is a particularly male dominated field.” I scoffed a bit at that bit of polite bullshit before easing into the chair I'd been in. I leaned back and crossed my legs, folding my hands across my stomach without breaking eye contact with him.

“Men are easily manipulated. It is the rare man that proves to be different.” My words fell like a bomb in the silence stretching in the room. I don't think either of them moved, breathed even. I smiled pleasantly and waited for them to adjust. At this rate they'd quickly learn just how much I'd changed in the last five years. 

“What do you mean by that, Yuki? Do you mean...” He let the words trail off and I widened that polite smile just a little more, an edge of near violence just underneath, if you knew what you were looking at. The headmaster knew it for what it was and for the first time ever I watched uncertainty cross his face, uncertainty all for me. My heart clenched a little but I refused to be the first one to blink. 

“I meant what I said, headmaster. Take what you will from it.” In my dealings with the media I'd learned that little statements like the last, ones with the perfect edge of aggression, mystery and challenge were simply eaten up. They loved that shit. It helped that they also tended not to poke at the statement, which was quickly making it one of my favorite techniques. The headmaster dipped his head in acknowledgment and flopped back in his chair, staring at me over his folded hands. After a few breaths he spoke.

“I will put the word out for more guardians and have Zero begin setting up a schedule for training the ones we have. I will also do as you suggested and assign this telemarketing task to a handful of trusted friends among the faculty.” I nodded. “Not that we won't be holding these meetings regularly but, anything else you might need feel free to come right to me.” I stood and dipped my head graciously. Zero was gone. I wasn't sure when or where he'd gone but I was glad he wasn't here. I moved towards the door. I stopped in front of it and turned to find him staring at me. 

“Never your friends, headmaster. Someone you trust, yes, absolutely. Someone you love-” I shook my head. “Not if you value them.” I reached for the doorknob while his words came to me. 

“What has happened to you these last handful of years? What has killed the joy in my Yuki's eyes?” I felt tears burn up the back of my throat in a painful lump, shooting in stinging pinpricks across my eyes. What had happened to me? Too much. For some reason I remembered a story, though not its title, that I'd read somewhere of a man who'd fought against the shadows with his faith lighting the only candle responsible for fighting back the darkness. In the end the light went out. That didn't help my mood. 

“What have you seen? Learned?” I twisted the cool metal of the knob and the breeze from opening it tickled my hair across my cheek. 

“In the end, the shadow will swallow light.” That's what I'd learned. Cynicism be damned.

“What about a really bright light?” I couldn't help but smile, but it was still tainted with the edge of tears. 

“The brightest of lights cast the darkest of shadows that will consume the flames that created it with a flickering breath. All they have to do is wait.”

“Wait for what?” His voice was choked with something that sounded dangerously close to tears. I wanted to look at him but dared not to.

“That depends on the flame.” I stepped through the door.

“Yuki.”

“Yes?” 

“It's father!” My smile widened as I began pulling the door shut. 

“Good evening, father.” I closed the door with a soft click and grinned at the smile of pure joy I saw on the headmaster's face, the last image that ran through my head before I was yanked into a room four doors down from my own room. I swung out on instinct, twisting free from the grip on my arm. They were on me before I could so much as breathe.

Wherever we were it was dark. Too dark to see. Even a vampire needs at least a little bit of light to be able to see. I moved out of instinct, listening to my body, the feel of the air currents, the electric thrill of sound as my guides. 

I felt the air shift and barely moved in time, dropping just below the woosh of air where my head had been. Their leg began sweeping back and I struck, moving my body in one line of strength and power exploding upward from my feet. I planted my foot in their chest, a solid kick that forced the air from them on a gust of pain. He, definitely a he from the sound of it, flew back from me maybe twelve feet or so, landing with a crash and a grunt. I followed that grunt and suddenly I was flipping him on his stomach, pinning him to the floor with my knee in his back as I got his arm in a pressure, joint lock so that his hand was twisted between his shoulder blades. He made a pain noise and his body tensed with some movement. I couldn't see what he was doing and wasn't willing to take any chances. My fingers found a great grip in his long hair as I used it as a handle to bounce his skull off the floor. He went still for a moment that I used to use my hand in his hair to stretch his neck in a long, clean line. 

My fangs dropped low with all the adrenaline. I could feel the points of my fangs dimple the skin just below my lower lip. In combat a vampires fangs grew an average of three times their normal length, making them pretty useful tools for rending flesh from bone. Not every vampire could grow their fangs that large. No, it was a distinguished mark of the pure-blood line. I leaned over the man below me, grinding my knee into him while putting a little extra pressure on his arm. I got a small grunt of pain in return, just enough to spike his anger and fear perfuming the air. I licked my lips, stomach contracting hard enough that I almost sank my fangs into him. I closed my eyes and fought to keep still. The hunger twisted through me and I dragged my fangs up the side of his neck in response. He gasped and I smelled it the musky, wet smell of arousal. Under that, perfuming the primal smell of sex, was something I knew well, something that added a final element of intoxication. A crisp fall breeze carrying the faint scent of something floral. 

I screwed my eyes shut to fight the blinding rage inside me. I used my hand in his hair to shove off him, bouncing his head off the floor again making him grunt. I strutted around the room, pacing to where the window was to rip back the curtains. The silver of the moon showed me that Zero hadn't moved from where I'd left him. 

“Fucking moron!” My words growled out between my lips. I was so pissed I could hardly stand still. I could have killed him. I could have killed, Zero. And it would have been over something stupid. His silence was what stopped me. He lay still on the floor, eyes a pale circle of silver trailing me around the room. He watched me patiently, as if waiting for something he knew was coming and so he could wait there like that forever. My hunger twisted through me so fast and hard that I made a small noise of protest as I turned away from him. Oh god. I smelled him. Around me. On me. Everywhere. My whole body felt engorged with hunger. I couldn't remember the last time I'd fed. When had I last fed? I scrambled through my memories trying to remember. I had been at the academy a week today and hadn't fed that whole time. I flitted through my memories trying to remember and came up blank. When? When, when, when? 

A face, female, long blonde hair, huge hazel eyes. Shit. I felt like kicking myself. The last time I'd fed was off the wife of the president of France. 

“Let me feed you. I want to see what it feels like.” She swept her long, blonde hair over the shoulder of a business suit that probably cost more than the private jet that had gotten us there. She began leaning into me. I put a hand gently but solidly against her shoulder. She showed me giant hazel eyes filled with soft confusion. I shook my head at her, forcing my eyes from the large, pulsing vein in her neck so readily exposed. 

“You misunderstand, Mrs. Hollan. Even if I wished to accept your...delectable-” I trailed my fingertips gently down the exposed line of her throat. “offer, I could not.”

“Why not?” She shivered a little and I saw that gleam in her eyes I'd become incredibly familiar with. I stifled the sigh and smiled politely. 

“Pure blood vampires, like myself and Lord Kuran, spread vampirism with our bite.” I added sultry charm to the smile I showed her as I sidled closer to her slender body. She eyed my every movement with anticipation, eyes sliding shut as I cradled the smooth, flawless curve of her cheek. She nuzzled my hand, eyes rolling up so she was showing me all the sexy those big eyes could convey. 

“Then share with me your dark kiss.” I couldn't help the dark laugh that rolled out of my throat in a low rumble. Her husband made a noise of outrage in the background as I smiled my first genuine smile of the evening. I leaned into her until our noses nearly touched. 

“My dark kiss would then be called murderer for having snuffed out the light of a star.” She frowned. I don't know why but I found myself smiling at the simple, arrogant, ignorant beauty of the woman before me. I closed what little distance there was between us with a kiss, long, probing and thorough. The kiss she'd wanted since we'd come. I broke the kiss, holding her body close to mine. She swallowed twice before she could speak. 

“Take something, anything from me.” She breathed against my mouth. I couldn't help the soft chuckle that came in response. Fool. She was not the first of her kind. There were those that would have nothing but professionalism. Then there were those who cared more for games and sexual deviation. She was the latter of the two. “Please.” She kissed me several times to accompany her plea. I smiled down at her. 

“I'll need a knife.” She nodded and I felt movement. I looked up to see Mr. Hollan moving toward us. I ignored him and kissed the woman in my arms. I knew Mr. Hollan had joined us when the Mrs. moaned in my mouth at being pressed between the two of us. I broke the kiss, looking over the woman between us at the man before me. His eyes were dark pools of a brown that was nearly black, a little too wide. His breathing was a little too quick as he licked his lips. He looked away from me to his wife cradled between us. He palmed a handful of those long, blonde waves, pulling her head back against him with a jerk of motion. She moaned for him, skin exposed for me. So much skin. I licked my own lips at the creamy mounds of her breasts, piled up and quivering with every breath. The dress was a tight, sheath of red that emphasized every curve she had, the type of dress that made underwear an impossibility. If the bust of the dress wasn't as tight as it was there was no way someone as well endowed as her would have been able to pull it off. A cup in either direction would have ruined how perfectly this dress framed her every asset. Mr. Hollan placed the edge of the blade into the flesh of her left breast hard enough to dimple the flesh and draw a moan from the Mrs. He kept my eyes and flicked his wrist in a quick, practiced motion that told me better than any number of pretty words just how kinky the Hollans really were. She gasped and then I was spell bound, watching the rich red of her blood well up in little beads from the thin cut. It wasn't until the drops swelled enough to begin trailing down that pale creaminess that my will broke. I caught the blood on my tongue, closing my eyes so I enjoyed every drop. I locked eyes with Mr. Hollan.

“I know places where the blood flows a lot easier.” He was breathing through his partially open mouth and could only nod. 

We ended with Mrs. Hollan stretched on her back between us, him pinning her wrists down under his own body weight at my request. Wouldn't want her clawing me up. I didn't mind a little blood, but it looked bad on the cameras if I didn't take extra measures to heal the wounds, which was not an option. Her head was propped on a pillow so she could see me without effort. I kept staring into her eyes as I slid my hands up the inside of her legs, spreading them as I went. I smiled as the bare, soaking wetness of her was exposed to me. Nope. No undies. I ran my tongue where my hands had just been, running circles over the soft skin barely covering the large veins just below. I filled my eyes with everything she wanted to see so very badly as I stared up the line of her body and let my fangs slowly grow in length so that I was more likely to eat her than drink from her if I did sink fang, but it made for a great show. That was part of the thrill wasn't it? The threat of real danger looking up at you between soaked thighs, the promise of blurring the line between pain and pleasure. It was a powerful weapon, seduction. 

I grabbed the knife off the bed and teased the edge of the blade up her thigh, getting a soft sigh in response. Mr. Hollan made a noise and I rolled my eyes up to see Kaname pressed behind the man. He had a hand in Hollan's thinning hair, moving his head back so that his neck was exposed in a long line. The Mrs. moaned, head tipped back to see the show. Kaname caught my eyes and I dipped my head in acknowledgment. I called my fangs back until they were barely longer than the rest of my teeth. 

I sliced a shallow gash in her inner thigh and she cried out, body jerking in response. Mr. Hollan echoed her cry a fraction of a second after her. She looked down at me with something close to terror in her eyes. Blood flowed pretty steadily from the small wound on her thigh. She flinched a little as I began leaning down towards her. I watched her face as I locked my mouth around the wound, careful of my fangs, which despite their size were still sharp. Her face twisted with the edge of discomfort and I smelled her first adrenaline rush. It was going to hurt at first, it always did. I worked my tongue over the wound, keeping the blood flowing and kicking those amazing endorphins into her system. I saw the exact moment she began to feel them. Her eyes rolled and slid shut, mouth opening as she gasped for air. 

“Mon Dieu.” She moaned. Mr. Hollan was very thoroughly enjoying himself, hands roving over Kaname trying to find something to hold onto. Soft moans fell from his lips as often as breathe. She grabbed my attention again by entwining her fingers in my hair. Her husband was too wrapped up in his own pleasure to remember about holding her down. I sucked a little harder and she cried out, arching her back. Once the endorphins kicked in pain and pleasure were nearly indivisible, one heightening the other. Her breathing quickened, her thighs quivering on either side of me. I knew the long build up before climax when taking someone this way was an excruciating pleasure to burn you alive from the inside out. I knew it very well. She moaned to me, gasping things in French as my tongue drew her closer to release. 

“S'il vous plait.” She gasped. I sucked on the wound hard and fast, pulling as much of it into my mouth as I dared. She moaned, fingers clenching tightly in my hair, drawing a sound from me. My mouth filled with her blood, hot, sticky and sweet. I swallowed her down as she finally climaxed. I tasted the rush of endorphins in her blood, changing her flavor from sweet to a pleasant tangy flavor. I moaned and drew more of her in. Her body spasmed beneath me, the only still part of her being the leg I held still beneath my mouth. She screamed and it was quickly muffled. I rolled my eyes up to see her husband kissing her in such a way that his tongue proved to be quite an effective gag. I stilled my mouth against her and flattened my tongue over the wound. I let my magic fill me, directing it to my mouth where it rested on her wound. I thought about the wound knitting shut and felt it close beneath my tongue. Mrs. Hollan was a boneless heap on some kind of lounge thing we'd been on. Kaname stood by the armchair not ten feet away, staring at me. 

“Thank you.” He breathed through my mind.

I snapped out of the flashback with a gasp. What had brought me out of it? Zero. He was on his feet and moving toward me in a slow lope that was strangely submissive looking. Zero was anything but submissive. What was going on here. My stomach contracted so hard it nearly doubled me over and I couldn't help but groan from the pain. Zero stopped walking and eyed me, cocking his head to the side. 

“You're hungry.” My stomach chose right then to prove his point. “Very hungry.” He began moving toward me again, even slower this time. I shook my head at him. 

“Stay away.” He smiled but still kept coming. 

“When was the last time you fed?” He said from barely five feet away. I scurried several steps backward and held out both hands toward him. 

“Please.” One word whispered out on a shaky breath. Sweat trickled down my spine even as I felt how cool my skin had grown. 

“When was the last time you fed, Yuki?” I glanced at him then away. We'd met with Mr. and Mrs. Hollan nearly three weeks before I'd come to the academy. I forgot to eat a lot but I don't think I'd ever forgotten for nearly a month. Things had been hectic for so long you'd think I'd be used to scheduling feedings in between pleasing the royals. I realized I still hadn't answered him. I was actually surprised he hadn't already pestered me again. He stood there, patiently awaiting my answer. 

“Too long.” My voice was hoarse with need. If I could just get away from him, somewhere I couldn't smell him or see him standing there all sexy and shit. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath. Mistake. The smell of him filled my lungs, I tasted him on the back of my tongue as if I'd licked him. My fangs ripped there way free, dropping down to almost an inch, nearly half what they were at battle length. My stomach seized so hard I dropped into a squat and huddled around the pain. I could hear his heart pushing blood through his veins, smell it all coursing just below the surface. All I'd have to do is- 

I exploded to my feet, startling Zero into jumping a foot back. He'd been about to touch me when I'd moved. I was breathing heavily, pulling his scent, the rush of his body into me with every breath. I needed away from him now!

“I need to get out of here.” My voice was guttural and slightly slurred from speaking around the fangs. 

“You need to feed, Yuki.” He stared at me as his fingers deftly undid the first button on his already gaping shirt. My mouth watered at the sight of all that smooth skin gleaming in the moonlight. He undid the next button and I finally realized what was going on here. No way could I let that happen. I shook my head at him. I kept shaking my head at him as I watched his fingers dance over each button until his shirt was more framing the lean muscled expanse of his upper body than covering it. I had all the time in the world to tell him to stop and yet I was spellbound by the slow reveal of skin. He took a step toward me and I backpedaled too quick, tripping over nothing and landing on my ass. I was on my feet so quick you'd swear it never happened. He was smiling. 

“What the fuck are you smiling about?” I didn't think the situation was very funny. 

He chuckled and took another step toward me. I was going to run out of room soon and I didn't want to be backed against a wall. I whirled and darted for the door. I felt him, smelled him moving. Before his hand ever touched my shoulder I had his wrist in my hand, using my grip to throw him in a text book perfect shoulder toss except that I kept my grip on his wrist, using it to slam him into the floor. I flipped my body on top of him so that I straddled his waist, leaning over him in a push up position. Surprise glimmered through his eyes so quick if I hadn't been looking I'd have missed it. 

“Twice tonight you've surprised me, Yuki.” I smiled, more a baring of fangs really.

“Surprise? You mean this wasn't exactly what you wanted, Zero?” I let the disbelief I felt show through in my voice. 

He knew exactly what he was doing. Bastard. Why was he doing this? That was the real question. He blinked up at me as if he had no idea what language I'd spoken, let alone what I'd said. I dropped down so that I was suddenly laying on him, face almost in his neck. The gums around my fangs throbbed in time to my heart and instead of my stomach contracting something that felt like an electric spear impaling me from the stomach out nearly made me scream in Zero's ear. My whole body tensed and the fire began. My throat felt raw, like fire was being poured down it. Zero sat up, wrapping his arms around me. I locked eyes with him and what I saw there startled me. Zero looked pained, like something was physically hurting him. 

“What's wrong, Zero? Did I hurt you?” His lips curved back in a small smile at first but it slowly grew until for the first time in so many years, he laughed. It was one of those deep belly laughs and I smiled too. He was absolutely stunning when he laughed. So beautiful. The laughter changed how he smelled. Instead of an autumn breeze he smelled like lavender carried on the wind of a warm, breezy spring night.

I suddenly had my hand in his thick, long silken hair, using it to pull his head back. I used my arm around him to pull our bodies together from chest to groin. I wrapped my legs around him and tightened my grip on his hair until he made a small noise for me. His eyes were closed, lips slightly parted. I stretched my body so I could lick a thin trail up the side of his neck. His arms wrapped around my waist, holding me closer, not pushing me away. That wasn't right. This wasn't right. I could feel him growing firm against the part of me that wanted him most. A bolt of pain shot through me again and I had to throw myself backwards to keep from sinking fang into Zero. I didn't go far with his arms keeping me from falling. My body was bowed backwards away from him, grinding me into his now hard cock. He groaned for me and bit his lip, blood trickled from where his fangs had cut him. I didn't even think about it. I just leaned in and licked the blood off his chin. I hesitated for a moment at the line of his bottom lip before saying fuck it and licking that too. I wanted to pull his lip into my mouth and suck on it, but the fangs made damn sure that wasn't going to happen. Zero was watching me as I pulled back and I saw he was breathing hard and the air was thick with the heady mixture of the musky scent of arousal and desire, both his and mine. Fuck, fuck, fuck...that was exactly where this was going. No, no, no-

“Do it.” His words were husky and I shivered. I shook my head too hard, trying to shake the stupid away. 

“No. Let me go.” He jerked me against him until our faces were inches away, lifting me off his lap. 

“You want, need, it. So take it, Yuki.” I shook my head again and stopped my fingers from unconsciously playing with his hair while we talked. 

“No. Please let me go, Zero.”

“You're in pain. You need to feed.” I wanted to analyze every fine detail of him to figure out what had changed about him. He was just acting so differently from the Zero I had known. 

“I need you to let me go before I do something we both might regret.” He held me tighter and I wriggled against him, getting a hissing inhale in response. 

“Stop that.”

“Let me go.”

“Feed.”

“No.”

“Feed, Yuki.”

“Dammit, Zero! I said no! What the fuck?” I was breathing hard from the outburst, finally angry again. I whispered sweet nothings to my anger, coaxing it to roar. Anger was good. I wasn't ready to jump Zero right here and now anymore. I was just one thousand percent pissed the fuck off. I shoved him but he didn't move, just stared at me. 

“Let me go, Zero.” He still didn't move. I sighed and closed my eyes. “I don't want to hurt you, Zero.” I could smell him everywhere and the feel of his body against mine was too much with so many hungers right below the surface. I needed away from him. The pulse in the side of his throat jumped like it was dancing to some tune I could hear if only I just-.

“Oh god.” I dropped my head against his shoulder. “Please.” My words were a quiet whisper, not because I wanted to be quiet but rather I was afraid I'd start yelling or something worse, much worse. “Please don't make me hurt you, Zero.” I felt tears sting my eyes and blinked them away. No way in hell was that happening. You didn't cry over shit like this. You had to be stronger than that. I had to be stronger than that. 

“You won't hurt me.” 

“I will if you don't let me the fuck go.” He tightened his hold and I think I growled, not sure really. “I refuse to feed from you, Zero. I won't do it. So, you can let me go or we get to see who wins Wrestlemania between the two of us.” 

“What?” I rolled my eyes. Of course he didn't understand the reference. 

“Let me go or I'm going to kick your ass.” There. That was nice and simple. He seemed to be analyzing me as he roved his eyes over my face. Whatever he saw there must have satisfied him in some way because he let me go. I stood up and took three big steps away from him, making a beeline to the door. 

“Leaving so soon, Yuki?” I stopped and closed my eyes trying to steal myself against going back to him and giving him a reason to sound so husky. When I opened my eyes he was leaning with his back against the door, almost like he needed to be further away too but he wasn't ready to let me leave yet. I sighed. 

“Is there something you'd like to talk about, Zero?” He was so still, only his shirt fluttering gently around his slowly rising chest showed he was alive. 

“You've surprised me three times tonight.” I sighed again and turned away to sit on the edge of the bed. My heart was in my throat, body humming with need and desire. 

“Yeah? You don't say.” He frowned at me. 

“These ridiculous things you say are only the very beginning of how much you've changed.” I laughed a nasty burst of sound that startled him enough that he was suddenly standing on his own and not lounging decoratively against the door. 

“Oh, Zero. You have no idea just how different I really am.” He nodded and laughed, an odd reaction, one the Zero I used to know would have sneered at. 

“So it would seem.” He shook his head while running his hand over his face and through his hair. My body tightened at seeing all that tall lithe body stretched in a long line, skin glowing in the moonlight. I took a deep breath realizing I had forgotten to breathe. My stomach cramped up on me and I knew I had to get out of there. If I lost control again so soon there would be no coming back. 

“Your eyes light the dark with your lust.” I closed my eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. The smell of him was so deep inside me I couldn't help but roll the taste of him around on my tongue and savor the flavor. I shuddered from head to feet as another bolt of agony shot through me. I must have made some noise because Zero was staring at me with something like pity.

“Do not pity me, Zero. Just get out of my way.” The edge of anger, long overdue, was there in my words. He simply stared at me and I could suddenly smell his desire like it had kicked me in the lungs. I gasped for breath and backed away before I ravaged him. There was nothing fluffy or sweet about what I wanted from him. I wanted to sink my fangs into him as he fucked me. I wanted to hear him scream for me. I shook my head and scrambled away from him. I was on the other side of the bed, which meant I had gone over it at some point, but I didn't remember it. Zero had never moved, staring at me in my corner while propped against the wood of the door once again. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Zero's voice was the perfect medium between inquisitive and devilishly knowledgeable. I don't know if my patience was all used up for the day or something but I just snapped. I was suddenly so pissed that I didn't remember moving. I had Zero by the throat against the door, body pressed into his. My breasts pressed into his upper chest, which was when I realized that my feet were not on the floor. Zero's hands were passively hanging at his sides. Huh. This was a new one. My powers were slowly coming on line so occasionally, like now, I'd accidentally stumble across an ability. Cool. His hands wrapping around my waist brought me back to the situation at hand. My anger roared back over me as I looked and saw him with his head tipped back against the door, eyes closed, waiting. 

“Is this what you want, Zero? You want me to sink my fangs into you?” He was breathing hard, I felt the rush of every breath through my hand on his throat. I could hear his heart and taste him like a favorite candy flavor coating on my tongue. I leaned into him and hissed my next words in his ear. 

“You want me to give you a reason to call me monster. A reason to take away the guilt of killing me.” I watched the first hint of red glow behind those metallic lavender eyes. I grinned and couldn't help it. 

“I'm sorry. Am I pissing you off? Aw.” I rolled my bottom lip out in a pout. His hands on my waist squeezed almost to the point of pain. “I won't help you kill me, Zero. I like living a little too much.” 

“Yuki-” He cut himself off but I heard the warning in his tone. I raised an eyebrow and asked him a question that had been bugging me.

“How did you get out of my room last night? The locks on the door were intact when I checked them and the window was shut too.” He looked taken aback by my question for a moment before he smiled coyly at me and shook his head, clearly telling me his secretes were his own. My anger spiked and I should have just stopped there. Of course, I didn't. 

“Fine. What have you learned from spying on me this past week?” He covered it up pretty quickly with arrogance but I saw the flash of surprise. 

“What reason would I have to spy on you, Yuki?” 

“Why don't you tell me. My first thought was that you were trying to scope out the habits of your target, me, deciding the best way to kill me or if you should kill me. My second guess was something more mundane like extra security.” My tone alone said how little I believed that last statement. “Which is it, Zero?” His eyes were vamped out now, glowing red. “I'm a little tired of passing your tests, Zero.”

“How do you know you passed them?”

“You wouldn't keep testing me if I hadn't passed the previous one.” He laughed and shook his head. 

“Naive, Yuki. Still so naive.” I let the anger rage inside me but my voice was startlingly calm. 

“I'm not naive enough to ignore the fact that you want me, Zero. You want to hold my body close while you sink-”

“Stop.”

“You're fangs and other things deep inside me. If you can-”

“Stop this, Yuki!” His eyes flamed a brilliant red, the tattoo on his neck glowing a pale blue. I smiled. Despite everything I could still smell how aroused he was, how chokingly thick his desire was to do everything I'd said and more. He was breathing hard like he'd run a 10k at neck-break speed.

“If you can look me in the eyes and tell me I'm wrong then I'll never bring it up again and we can resume as if this whole fucking thing never happened.” 

“You swear a lot, now. You never used to talk like this.” The statement seemed absent-minded, like he was distracted by something. I shrugged.

“It's been a rough few years.” I swallowed hard, closing my eyes as pain ripped through me and suddenly I was back on the other side of the bed again, watching him and waiting. He took several steps toward me before stopping. He shook his head and made some noise in the back of his throat. I couldn't deny that I wanted him to say I was right because I wanted him in every way. But if I could make him do the thing he wanted me to do to prove I was a monster I could turn the tables on him. Could he kill me for being the very same thing as himself? It was worth a shot.

“You can't can you? Better yet...” I began moving over the bed, again.

“What are you doing?” I was back on my feet, moving towards him.

“Show me, Zero. Show me I'm wrong.” He took a few steps backwards, putting the door at his back again. He looked back at it, as if he wasn't aware he'd been that close, before quickly coming back to me. Panic flashed through his eyes but underneath was eagerness, anticipation. I was only feet away from him now.

“No, Yuki. Stop this.” I pressed my body as tightly as I could against him, running my fingers under the shirt framing that finely muscled chest. His skin was smooth and hot. Very hot. I curved my fingers over his shoulders and up the side of his neck. Just beneath his jaw I trailed my fingernails back down his neck. He shivered for me and I watched a fresh trail of blood shine down his chin from his fangs bleeding the lip he was biting. He grabbed me and spun, slamming my back into the wall. I gasped and wrapped my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his waist. I licked a wet line up his neck and he groaned.

“Stop...this...” He gasped out, fingers finding a sudden grip in my hair, pulling my head back so that my neck was exposed. I moaned and rolled my body against his. He wrapped his arm around my waist and fell to his knees. I thought it might have hurt but he didn't seem bothered, so I didn't mention it. He tipped his head back, sucking in a deep breath that shuddered on the way back out. I pulled against his hold on my hair to drag my fangs up his neck. His body began to tremble, a very fine quivering of muscles. 

“Oh god...” He moaned, body shivering hard enough to jostle me with him. “Stop this, Yuki.”

“Tell me I'm wrong and I will.” He shook his head.

“You have to-” He had to pause while his body spasmed again. I ground my hips into him where I was pressed against the hard length of him once again. He cried out.“Stop. Before I...” His hands were on my hips now as I began slowly rolling them against him. 

“Before you what?” I breathed against his ear. He growled and I felt him tense a second before he jacked my body up and struck. 

A/N- Hey guys so I don't plan on this story being lengthy in the number of chapters, but the chapters are going to be pretty lengthy themselves, as you can see. I'd love to hear some feedback. How are you guys liking the story so far? I'd especially love to hear what you think about the new Yuki. I think I like her a little too much, if there is such a thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N- Hello again Ladies and Gents! It has been quite some time since I posted the last chapter, for that I sincerely apologize. As the semester wound down and finals crushed me, move out loomed above my head and a ton of personal drama ensued I unfortunately could not find the time to write. But here it is! I hope you enjoy it! 
> 
> Thank you to those who reviewed! I love to hear from you guys! Special thanks to the guest reviewer who pointed out some inconsistencies in the last chapter, I really appreciate it and have both fixed and updated the last chapter! Ta-ta for now, my friends! Enjoy! ;-D

CHAPTER TWO

I hissed at the pain of the initial strike, twining my fingers in that long hair. The feel of victory curled my lips into a wide smile, quickly wiped away by the first stirrings of the endorphins. I closed my eyes, luxuriating in the rush of pleasure. I trailed my fingers over the muscles in his shoulder with my free hand, feeling the smooth, pale flesh. 

I sighed as my body began to surrender to him, one muscle at a time. His arms tightened around me and his moan vibrated up my throat. As the endorphins began to make the world seem fuzzy my body began to try to slake its own desires. My hips rolled against his lower stomach, not quite where I wanted to be. I gasped as he sunk his teeth in a little more and moaned as his bite worked its magic, stroking through me as if my whole body was a pleasure sensor. There was one spot in particular, pretty close to all those other delicious spots, that was like a second g-spot buried deeper inside me than any man could ever hope to touch. His fingers were suddenly sliding along my waist. I stopped breathing. He had never touched me like this, even when we had been so intimately together he'd always made it clear that beyond a certain point physical contact was a huge taboo. His hands kneaded the flesh of my waist and worked there way up my back as each draw from my neck drew me closer and closer to orgasm. His breathing changed and he moaned into my flesh. His body shook against me with repressed desires. I knew from being on both ends of the biting spectrum, it felt good. Blood and sex were desires so closely entwined that I'd always thought it was cruel that the aristocrats considered combining the two perverse. Feeding slaked one hunger and fueled another. A double edged sword, if ever there was one.

My breathing changed as the pleasure escalated suddenly from being a steady flow of feel-goods to a slow climb to the top of pleasure mountain. He jerked my body tighter against his, shoving the air out of me on a moan. He had to of taken his fill by now. Even vampires had a limit to what they could consume. The endorphins rolled me closer to the edge. Close. So close. I shook my head. What was I doing? No. This couldn't happen. Kaname. What about him? I argued with myself over what I wanted versus what I should do, finally deciding to walk the better course of valor maybe a few moments too late.

“Zero...” I gasped out. “Zero, you-” I dug my fingers into his hair as he dug his fangs in again. My eyes began rolling back into my head as the pleasure began to climax. I shook my head hard, feeling his fangs tear where he'd buried them deep in my neck. The pain was just right, putting me on the brink. The brink I was so very familiar with that Zero loved bringing me too, just to leave me hang there. 

“Stop! Zero...” Whatever breath I had left me in a loud moan as my body exploded, the world falling in crystalline pieces around us. My body spasmed against his, spine unsuccessfully attempting to bow against Zero's grip. I felt him moan before I dissolved into a writhing mass against him. Every draw of his mouth on my neck was a fresh wave of pleasure so that the whole thing was one long orgasm. He finally pulled away with a gasp, head going back. He moaned loudly before easing his body forward. I felt him trembling against me as I flopped bonelessly back onto the floor. Zero's body was propped on his arms alone, the lower half of him was draped between my legs. I blinked up at him through half-lidded eyes and moaned. His skin gleamed with a sheen of sweat, hair hanging like a silver curtain around his face. His eyes when they rolled up to me were so red they cast a brilliant glow across the soft flesh of my exposed breasts, showing where my shirt had been ripped to reveal how my bra mounded them up. When had that happened? We were both breathing hard and fast. My blood trickled in a thin line from the corner of his mouth. A flash of fear zipped through me at the nearly predatory ferocity in his eyes. My body had betrayed me, leaving me laying defenseless before him and a part of me was screaming in terror. But another part swept a low, mocking bow and rolled eyes up to him in challenge with a daring grin. Part of me wanted him to take whatever he wanted from me. Even if that something happened to be my life. Though something told me it would be a lot harder to just let someone kill me than I realized. All thoughts fled when Zero's tongue began lapping at the wound on my neck. It was too soon. My body instantly reacted, arching up into him, fingers digging into his back, legs widening in invitation. 

My nails were mournfully short, as per Kaname's request. He said I was too “voracious” a lover for nails. He couldn't have anyone see marks of passion painted across his skin. Heaven forbid he should have a life off camera. So as I dug my fingers into his back and didn't fear if I'd break skin or not. I missed them. I'd quickly found out that I loved some blood with my sex, and sometimes I wasn't very careful about how I got it. I wanted blood and so much more from the man above me. Wanted it so bad that it scared me. I pushed against his chest. No, I couldn't. I wanted him with everything I had. I wanted to cry at having him so close knowing I could never actually have him. The thought of what Kaname would do if he ever figured out did a fine job of sobering me. 

“Stop, Zero.” He froze above me. I don't think he was even breathing. “Get off of me.” There wasn't a trace of sex or lust in my voice, despite me still being breathless from our exertions. The sweat was still damp on my body, my heart still racing and if he didn't get off of me I didn't know what I would do exactly, but I did know it would be too graphic for a rating. Maybe the completely neutral calm of my voice was what finally got him to listen but he did. He slowly rolled off me, falling onto his side on the floor. I got to my feet and looked down at him, swaying slightly. His hair fell over his face hiding it from me but all six foot one of him was a treat to the eyes. As I roved my eyes over him I couldn't help but smile at the painfully obvious erection he was still sporting. I swallowed hard and turned away, trying not to let deviant thoughts and hormones boss me around. I began “walking” to the door on legs made of something gelatinous. 

“Yuki?” I stopped and squeezed my eyes shut. His voice was still gruff with the sexual baritone some men get, lisping around the edges like he was intoxicated. 

“Yes?”

“What makes you think I want to kill you?” That startled me enough that I turned around to face him. 

“You are the one who promised you would.” He nodded, rolling his head so that a chunk of hair fell away from his face revealing a nicely forming bruise on his forehead. His eyes were half-lidded, glowing softly.

“Do you keep expecting me to kill you?” I stared at him for long enough that Zero actually looked away and shuffled as if uncomfortable. 

“I don't know.” That was the only truthful answer I had for him. This new Zero was so new you could still smell the saw dust. Nothing had gone as I thought it would between us and it was all too damned confusing. 

“Why'd you come back here, Yuki? I know about you and the headmaster agreeing that you stay on the move far away from me.” I stared blankly at him, giving him what I called my camera face.

“I've already explained why I came back.”

“No.” I raised an eyebrow at him as he sat up slowly and carefully crossed his legs under him. “You proposed the idea to Kaname. You volunteered. You did all of this knowing I was here and still you came back. What is the real reason you're here?” I smiled my best aw-shucks smile.

“Would you believe I was homesick?” He frowned up at me but I could almost see him mulling it over.

“And you'd risk your life over that?” He asked it more to himself than anything and finally shook his head. “No. Try again.” He didn't believe it. Surprise, surprise. Tough shit. It was as close to the truth, which was something that needed to be told with a side of sake, as he was going to get. I shrugged and tried to ignore the headache starting up behind my eyes.

“Maybe I just didn't care.” It was like he suddenly just snapped into focus, glaring at me with an intensity I'd seen only a couple times. 

“Are you saying you came here to die?” I shrugged again. 

“Death will come for me when he pleases but I do not fear him. Living in fear of death is no life at all.” He looked confused for a moment and then I could smell his anger. 

“So you would have me be your executioner.” I shook my head and smiled. Oh, Zero. 

“I would have you be the man I love and nothing else.” He froze and a look of utter shock came over him that almost changed the absolute shock I felt at having said that into humor. The troublemaker in my head stepped forward. And what about Kaname...your husband, remember? You gonna kiss him with the same mouth that sucks Zero off? I cringed at the crass but too insightful internal me. I hadn't thought about Kaname until just a few moments ago and was ashamed that I kept forgetting him. Just five minutes ago I would have done anything to have Zero and Kaname hadn't crossed my mind once. Shame forced blood up into my face and neck so fast that the room felt hot. I turned for the door and my movements were fueled by my self-hatred. 

“Yuki, you never answered my question.” 

“I've answered enough of your questions.” 

“Do you want me to kill you?” I ground my teeth and whirled to face him.

“Of course not.” He smiled slightly as if finally getting closer to whatever he was getting at. 

“Why?”

“I'm so fucking sick of these games!” I saw my eyes flash red in the darkness. 

“Why?” He nearly growled it. 

“Because I don't ever want to put you in that position, Zero! Okay?”

“But you did. And you seem to have no problem putting father in a position where he stands to lose one, if not both of us.” Something inside of me wilted at hearing him say that but it was the rage that one out. 

“No one forced you to be a bigoted, fanatical douche nozzle, Zero. You chose that.” He was on his feet now.

“I had no choice, don't even dare to pretend I did.” I scoffed at that and rolled my eyes. 

“Classic. 'I had no choice.'” I mimicked. “Bullshit! Everyone has a choice, Zero. That's all life is. A series of choices and circumstance that twist the twines of fate.”

“I am the son of a family of vampire hunters.”

“Uh huh. And just because Jack was born into a family of doctors doesn't mean he can't be a painter.” He looked confused again.

“Who's Jack?” I rolled my eyes.

“It was hypothetical. Never-mind. Moving on.” His eyes were glowing with a nicely kindled anger of his own. 

“They killed my parents!” 

“Yes. They did. A woman-”

“A vampire!” He snarled.

“A vampire woman mourning the loss of her lover, taken by the hands of your parents, struck out at the people who stole him from her. Hmmmm...yeah, your right, doesn't sound very human at all. Definitely a monster that one.” Something smashed into the wall next to me. I glanced down to see one of the armchairs in pieces. Mature of him. 

“Are you patronizing me?” 

“Not every vampire is a monster, Zero. Even the vampire that caused your greatest sorrow did so out of love, in a twisted sense.” 

“Why do you defend them?!” He yelled.

“I am them, Zero! So are you, in case it's slipped your attention! There is no us and them when you are them!” 

“NO!” He shouted it so loud I felt it in my chest like a deep roll of thunder. “I will never be like them! Never!” I laughed so hard I had to lean against the wall for support. The laughter still stretched my face long after the sound faded. 

“You delude yourself.” He shook his head and I found myself echoing him.

“You are a glorified fool, my friend.” He glared at me and if looks could kill I'd of been eviscerated. 

“And you're a patronizing bitch.” I laughed, eyes widening in outrage. Zero had never said anything like that to me. I nodded.

“Sometimes. But I am an honest, patronizing bitch.” He shook his head and raked his hand through his hair, pacing a tight circle. He stopped and glared at me and then his eyes softened a little. 

“You're neck is bleeding pretty badly, Yuki.” I looked down at the dark trail of blood down the front of what was a white and pale blue pin-striped button down, the sky blue of my bra was a deep purple from soaking up so much blood. He took a step forward and without looking up I took one back. He sighed.

“Let me help you stop the bleeding.” I shook my head and took another step back. 

“I'll be fine.” I was starting to have a difficult time staring at anything but all that exposed skin, my stomach tightening in preparation for the hunger cramps. I shook my head again, tearing my eyes from him, swallowing hard. 

“I need to leave.” My voice was squeezing down tight with need. I needed to get out of there. Fast. I turned, flinging the door open. I heard him call my name as I fled around the corner. The door closed behind me as I rounded the first corner and ran into Hanabusa at full tilt sending us in a crashing heap to the floor. He wrapped his arms around me and took the full impact of our fall. I was suddenly sitting cradled in Busa's lap with him looking me frantically over, eyes too wide. 

“You're bleeding.” The pulse in the side of his throat was hammering to get out. A request I was happy to oblige. I shoved him away and surged to my feet, running down the hallway once again. I stumbled and fell to my knees for a moment before I was up and running again. The world was starting to lose it's fine edge. I was losing too much blood. 

“Lady Yuki!” Hanabusa yelled behind me. I had no idea where I was running but nowhere was going to be far enough. I could smell Zero everywhere and now I could smell Hanabusa. Stairs were bouncing into view ahead of me, I heard Busa running behind me. I was so desperate to get away from him that I launched myself down the steps. I put too much power into my jump and slammed into the wall just next to a giant stained glass window. I shoved off the wall and was airborne over the next flight of stairs, landing in a running stumble that forced me to catch myself with my hands before I was running head-long again. Pain speared through me, doubling me over and sending me crashing to the floor. I huddled around my stomach for a second before I hauled myself into the room next to me. The windows were closed, the walls bare, beds unclothed. The room hadn't been used this semester. Thank the gods. I willed my body to calm itself but the pain, the hungering thirst for desires too long denied ripped and roared through me. A hand was suddenly on my shoulder and then I had her pinned beneath me, fangs snarling in her face. 

Ruka's eyes widened, lips parting so she could draw in more air but she never tried to fight back, never tried to defend herself. I closed my eyes and tried to ignore the smell of anticipation. Ruka wanted this. If I hadn't been damn near crazed with hunger I might have asked why but I didn't care; I was too far gone. She wanted it. So did I. 

I palmed a handful of all that rich blonde hair and yanked her against me. She made a small noise that when I bit her was amplified into a moan. I moaned as I pulled sweet mouthful after decadent mouthful. I knew my body was wrapped around hers, rolling against hers as if to accommodate equipment she didn't possess. I heard her moans and felt her arms crushing me against her but the roar of her heart in my head and the rush of her blood in my body dominated my world. I tasted her orgasm before I realized anything else and then I felt her body spasm against mine, felt the vibration of her cries of pleasure fill my mouth. My own body began to grow full, heavy and languid like the post-sex high minus the fireworks show. I pulled away from her with a gasp, holding her limp body against mine. I laid her gently back against the floor, stroking my fingers through her hair before sitting back on her upper thighs. My head was heavy, muscles moving in lazy protest. I giggled and stifled the so embarrassing sound by shoving the back of my hand against my mouth. I smiled down at the beauty of the woman under me and licked my lips. 

Movement caught my attention and I rolled my eyes to see Busa, standing just inside the room. His eyes were wide with an edge of panic, chest heaving. He didn't seem to know what to do now that he was here. It was over now. I staggered to my feet, stumbling and nearly falling on top of Ruka. Busa was there suddenly, arm around my waist, lifting me completely over Ruka and over to the bed where he sat me down. I didn't protest only because I was almost positive I was too weak to get there myself. I flopped back on the mattress and giggled, closing my eyes to enjoy the warm, comfortable dizziness that was a fun side effect of feeding on other vampires. The bed dipped beside me and I opened my eyes as wide as I could, which was about half mast, to see Busa leaning down above me.

“What-” I had to stop and swallow before continuing. “What you doing?” He froze and I noticed his eyes glowing a dim red. 

“The wound on your neck is still bleeding pretty freely. If you are to stay sustained off of what you took from Ruka the wound must be sealed.” I frowned at him but couldn't argue with his logic. 

Ruka was probably still a puddle of bliss so that left him to do what he could. We didn't know why I healed slower than most pure-bloods when wounded by fangs. I just did. An unfortunate weakness since I, like most mortals, enjoyed a good bite now and then, a pleasure considered vulgar in the vampire aristocracy. I think Busa expected me to argue with him but I was simply too worn out. I rolled my head to the side, exposing the bite on my neck. He hissed and after a moment I felt his fingers brush gently along the skin. I could feel how torn the wound was as his fingers trailed over it all. 

“I'll kill him for this! How dare he mistreat you so heinously!” I could taste his anger on the air.

“My fault.” I grumbled. That electric zing of anger switched to the soft, slightly bitter flavor of surprise. 

“Lady Yuki-”

“It was my fault, Hanabusa. Can you just seal the wound as best you can, please.” He didn't say another word. I hissed as his tongue dipped into the wound, dancing around the ragged edges. 

The endorphins from his saliva combined with all that Zero had already pumped through me quickly turned the discomfort of having a fresh wound being poked at into a macabre sort of pleasure. I began enjoying each stroke of his tongue, my body tightening in response to the delicate balance of pleasurable pain. There was no way for me to hide my pleasure, he'd smell it. So I just accepted it. His mouth froze against my skin, body going stone still. He didn't even breathe for a moment before he continued. Busa got uncomfortable around me when I flashed too much skin. This was much too intimate for him. I was nearly half naked, covered in my own blood and probably reeked of sex. I was about to tell him to stop and get Ruka to replace him when he suddenly plunged his tongue into the deepest part of the bite. I groaned and dug my fingers into the bed to keep from grabbing him close to me. I fought to keep my body still, focusing everything I had on staying passive. My body ached for more carnal pleasures now that the thirst wasn't a looming threat. The wound no longer felt as deep as it once was, his tongue no longer pushing me closer to pain than pleasure at his deepest plunge. I could feel the beginnings of that long road to climax stirring within me and tried to think of anything else. Busa was blessed with the power to heal. The only catch was that he could only heal someone else if he gave up something of himself. A lot of vampire powers were grounded by a catch-22. Almost any bodily fluid would do. Why had he picked the tongue? Almost every vampire's saliva had healing properties but only a select few were as gifted at healing as Hanabusa.

“Why don't you simply use a little of your blood to heal the wound? Blood is more sufficient for such things anyway.” He could heal nearly instantly with his blood. He moved back enough to show me his eyes, his mouth and chin smeared with my blood. His eyes were glowing a nice bright red and something low inside me contracted hard and fast at the garnet swirl of that hooded gaze looking down at me and the red of my blood shining on those full lips. I knew that Hanabusa would never want me like that but my body knew no logic, only need. 

“Too much blood has been spilled already. I would not wish to stir your hunger again.” My eyes slid shut as his tongue laved at my neck again. 

Ruka and Hanabusa had been my personal guards for nearly four years now so they knew some of my darkest secrets. Things that if brought to light would prove me to be the monster Zero wanted me to be so badly. I knew what I was and what I wasn't. I was the monster. I was the very thing Zero feared me to be. I knew this and yet I wanted more than anything else that he never know. If Zero ever saw the darkest parts of me he would never be able to see anything else. Tears pricked at my eyes.

“You taste sad, Lady Yuki.” Hanabusa was looking down at me again. I looked away and exposed my neck to him more. 

“Finish.” I said. “Please.” I didn't want to think about Zero or Kaname or what I'd done. I simply wished to be somewhere, anywhere else. His mouth sealed around what was left of the wound, tongue working over it with an edge of some intense emotion that I couldn't bring myself to analyze. His eyes were half-lidded when he pulled away from me five minutes later, wiping the blood from his chin and mouth with the back of his hand. 

“You're wound is sealed.” His voice was thick with a liquid drawl around the edges, heavy with the high that came from my blood. I watched his eyes, a little wide, as he backed away. He was breathing heavier than normal. I frowned. What had he seen in my eyes? I sat up on the bed, the world trailing slowly behind me as if there was a lag in my perception of reality. Busa reached out as if to steady me but his hand froze mid-motion and he began pulling away. I grabbed his hand out of reflex and he flinched but didn't pull away. He stared at our hands and shook his head using his other hand to gently extract his fingers from mine, clasping my hand between both of his. His head was bowed, still shaking back and forth. 

“I am afraid I am not myself this night. I'd ask that you excuse me, lady Yuki.” 

“Busa?” I fought the calming blanket of endorphins to hold onto the glimmer of concern waving at the edges of my attention. He shook his head and retracted his hands, despite my efforts to grab one of them. 

“Hanabusa, what-”

“I must leave. My apologies, Yuki.” He was already disappearing through the doorway to the room. Ruka was sitting against the far wall, struggling to focus her eyes on me. 

“I don't have words for how sorry I am, Ruka.” She shook her head, once each direction.

“S'ok.” She was slurring as she spoke and had to swallow twice before continuing. “It's my job to make sure you are taken care of.” 

“No. This is not part of your job.” I shook my head then bowed it towards the floor. “This won't happen again. I can assure you.” I could damn near taste her fear and loss spike through the air. I cocked my head to the side as I looked up at her. How curious. Before I bit her I'd smelled her anticipation, felt her complete submission to my bite. Now she was scared, sad. Then something occurred to me. Something Takuma had told me a while back. 

“How long did you feed, Kaname?” Her head jerked up from where she'd let it hang in defeat. 

“How do you know that?” Her eyes were shiny with fear, the air rancid with the acrid smell. “Who told you?” Her voice had the beginnings of anger in it. I smiled slightly and shook my head with a sigh, leaning back on my hands to look at her. 

“I am aware of your feelings for him, Ruka. Always have been.” Her mouth fell open and she seemed to be floundering for something, anything to say. I held one hand up to stop her. “It's okay, Ruka. We can't help who we love.” The shock on her face was so intense I almost laughed. Almost. 

In our PR battle with the humans to make us look more acceptable Kaname had instituted a plethora of rules he demanded we obey while traveling on this international tour. Especially rules about behavior, particularly feeding habits. One such rule was that only the lesser vampires, aka anyone not pure-blood, were allowed to feed and only on people delegated by the head honcho of the week. Unless someone insisted, Kaname made sure that neither him nor I fed on anyone but our own people, so we look more reserved and show the humans they're not the only source of sustenance for us. Them not being likened to a food source was, not surprisingly, a huge help in our campaign. Vampire blood would sustain us but consuming a regular diet of it meant we had to feed more often. However, there are interesting perks like sexual euphoria, and depending on how powerful the vampire, you got additives like body highs you wouldn't believe. Lets not forget that for a short time you have access to magic they specialize in. It was usually only like dabbling in their magic pot, you could only use their abilities until you metabolized their blood and even then it was minor ability. Fun, nonetheless. The interesting side-effects made it a delicious experience, regardless of the increased consumption. 

Ruka had made it pretty impossible on several occasions that anyone but her feed Kaname. Now she looked at me like a dog waiting to be kicked and it made my heart hurt to see that look in her eyes. She expected me to hurt her. To cast her away. Some got hooked on the bite, others the feed, but both could be addictive and start a homicidal pattern of substance abuse, which would be the end of our little campaign if the media ever got a hold of that juicy little tidbit. I got off the bed and walked over to her. Her eyes widened as I knelt between her already parted legs.

“What are you doing?” I leaned in and heard her breathing speed up as my lips brushed her neck just above my bite mark. I froze and just observed her reaction to my closeness. Her heart was already racing, breath coming faster and her desire kicked up a notch as if it had been there the whole time, leaves stirring in the wind. 

“Yuki?” I ran my tongue along my bite which was still leaking a slow flow of blood. 

She stopped breathing. I wanted to smile but settled for placing my mouth over the wound. Just a little bit wider and my fangs would sink right back into the wound. Her breath finally left her on a shuddering sigh. I focused my magic into where my skin, my tongue danced against her, feeling the wounds knit closed beneath my tongue as I imagined it. I pulled away as soon as the wound was healed and sat back watching the pleasure of the endorphins dance across Ruka's face. 

“You're addicted to the bite?” Her head lulled down so that she was staring at the floor. 

“I am not addicted. But I cannot deny it is a weakness of mine.” When I was silent for a moment she coughed out something that sounded like a sad laugh. “Disgusting. I know.” I shook my head and curled my fingers under her chin lifting her head. Her eyes were wide, shining with tears she refused to let fall. 

“It is not a crime to do something that feels good.” She smiled, tears tugging at both the edges of her mouth and my heart. 

You couldn't go through the things we'd gone through these past five years and not have bonded. Not with any of them. Every vampire closest to me, that had thrown their life on the line again and again for me, bled, and in a few cases, nearly died for me. Those that I had healed or that had healed me. Those that fed me. Those that were loyal, honest and truthfully a pain in the ass more often then not. Those people were also those I laughed with the most, and on a few occasions, cried with. They were all individual and uniquely beautiful and I loved them. I valued them all. More than you value Kaname? I shoved the question away and let Ruka see how much I valued her. She needed it. We all did sometimes. 

“Stop looking at me like that.” Her voice was gruff with some emotion. I shook my head and smiled at her causing a frown to furrow her perfectly arched brow. “You make it difficult to hate you, Yuki.” My smile widened and I fought off the laugh that tickled in the back of my throat. I knew why she wanted to hate me and I was okay with it. She loved him. So did I, but I was beginning to suspect it wasn't enough. 

“What thought has chased the sun from your eyes?” I realized I was frowning and smiled at her.

“Why do all vampires speak so prettily?” I saw the first genuine smile from her all night and I had to smile along. 

“Not all vampires speak so eloquently, lady Yuki.”

“All the vampires I know do.”

“That is because all the vampires you know are aristocrats.” I frowned. 

“True.” I smiled suddenly. “But I've killed a lot of level E vamps!” She laughed a peal of sound that would turn heads in a bar and nodded.

“So you have, lady Yuki. You're skill in combat is ever more impressive.”

“You see!” I gestured at her with both hands. “You all speak flattery as if it were a language of seduction that rolls off the tongue.” She smiled brilliantly at me. 

“Very eloquently put.” I shrugged and gave her my aw-shucks smile. 

“I try.” I stood and offered her my hand. “Bygones?” She slapped her hand into mine and laughed as I pulled her to her feet. 

“Never. But that's what makes our relationship so interesting.” I laughed and began walking to the door. 

“Reece is gonna be so pissed.” I mumbled at my watch. We were nearly two hours late for his dance class. Ruka groaned in the background. 

“I hate him.”

“You don't like most people, Ruka.” 

“I hate dancing.” I rolled my eyes and shook my head. 

“Just shut up and dance, Ruka.” She groaned again as she shut the door behind us. 

 

…...............................................................................  
Two days later   
The night before the Halloween dance

“You are Mr. Kaname Kuran's wife?” I sighed and answered his question for the second time. 

“Yes, Mr. Moto.”

“You are a woman.” Yeah I am. I guess it took him that long to figure it out.

“I am. That's usually what the term wife implies, Mr. Moto.”

“Women are not politicians.” I rolled my eyes and bit my lip to keep from screaming at him. 

“I am Mr. Kuran's wife as we've established twice already. The union between my husband and I means more to us than a decorative title, Mr. Moto.”

“I will deal directly with Mr. Kuran.” Not every politician was this bigoted, I swear. Only most of them. In my experience if you got to know any politician enough to scratch just below the surface you always found the soft black soil of a deeply rooted belief. Or two. Or ten, depending on the person. 

“I founded the Coalition for Vampire and Human relations (CVHR) alongside my husband, Mr. Moto. I can assure you that everything discussed between us will be done so in confidence and our exchange will be regarded as if Kaname himself were present.”

“But he won't be with us and I will not discuss politics with a woman. Women cannot adequately understand such things as a man can.” I gritted my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut tight, pacing in the courtyard. 

“Shall I recount to you the failure of every policy you have put in effect since your re-election, Mr. Moto? Or maybe the scandal floating around about you and-”

“Hush your disrespectful mouth, woman!”

“I have a name, Mr. Moto and a title. I'm sure a man as competent as yourself would be knowledgeable about such things. At this point you are proving to be an undignified, disrespectful joke of a politician. I can help you or you can continue to behave as such and I take all my people and we leave Japan, never to return. Let me be abundantly clear, Mr. Moto. I will not lightly take being so openly mocked, nor will I be disrespected or ignored. You will treat me with honor or all dealings between us are finished.” He was quiet for a long moment, nothing but his breath coming over the line.

“Your husband allows you to speak as if your word were his?”

“I've already said as much.” He was silent again for a long while and I was content to let him stew until he'd thought of something intelligent to say.

“I cannot fathom allowing my wife such power. Women were never meant for such things, no offense intended, Mrs. Kuran.” I resisted the urge to ask him how it could be possible that I not find that offensive and soldiered on. 

“Do we understand each other, Mr. Moto?” He cleared his throat.

“And if you leave Japan and do not return what would Japan be considered to you? Would you call us your enemy?” I smiled and felt how unpleasant it was. 

If we did decide to leave Japan would potentially be losing a great ally but on the flip side of that coin, they'd be free from a metric shit ton of political maneuvering. If we made allies with another country they might see it as a threat. Then again, they might take it wrong when we started negotiating with the Chinese. I would have to talk to Kaname at some point about making an international address clarifying that we do not intend to ally ourselves with any particular country, or else we might be facing all out war soon. 

“Now, Mr. Moto, no such words ever left my lips.” 

“You speak in riddles.”

“I speak politics. The two are nearly one in the same.” He laughed and it was a pleasant masculine rumble that came to me just fine across the phone. 

“At least you're good for a laugh.”

“I asked you a question, Mr. Moto. Do we understand each other?” He made some noise in the back of his throat.

“Not nearly enough, Lady Yuki.” His voice was filled with light, inquisitive humor. He was a sexist bigot but he was not as foolish as he might seem. “You may come see me tomorrow around noon. Maybe you'd let me serve you a light lunch while we discuss things?”

“That sounds wonderful, Mr. Moto. I will see you then.” We said our goodbyes and I slumped in relief as the call log disappeared off my screen. I ran my hand over my face and grumbled.

“That could have gone badly.” I looked up to see Zero and the headmaster walking across the courtyard to me. 

“What are you talking about?” Father frowned at me, stopping roughly ten feet back. 

“Open ended threats with the Prime minister of Japan?” He sucked his tongue at me then smiled to lighten the statement. I smiled in return, a sinister edge creeping at the corners. 

“I simply let him infer whatever he wanted from a very broad response. I find that politicians, the media, royals, etc., etc. all love to weave their own meaning into the most harmless of statements.” He laughed at me and I smiled with him. 

“You have gained quite the head for politics.”

“I'm learning.” 

“Does Kaname know of your pending relations with the Japanese government?” Zero asked. 

A harmless question really but my smile was just suddenly gone, face blank like someone had flipped a switch. No I hadn't told him yet. I didn't think I was going to tell him. He might try to persuade me not to go to the meeting and I couldn't have that. He'd find out tomorrow anyway when he watched the news. He always watched the news. That was the only thing he watched really. He took my silence to be the answer it was.

“Don't you think if you're going to be throwing around your weight as his wife and partner it would be more beneficial to have your husband be knowledgeable of your actions?” I kept my face blank. There was logic to what he was saying. I had thought the very same thing myself at least twice before making the call to Mr. Moto. But I was pretty sure I'd settled on not telling him. 

“I will take your advice under consideration.” His face screwed up into something unpleasant.

“Take my advice under consideration? Prettily wrapped political bullsh-”

“Enough.” The command in the headmaster's voice silenced both of us. He shook his head at the both of us and began walking off. “Come, Zero. We have work to do.” Zero glared at me as he strode past. Tonight kick-started the training program of the guardians. Zero was to train them as he'd trained to be a vampire hunter. He hadn't like it very much at first but after a lot of arguing he'd finally seen the wisdom of it. 

I watched them until they disappeared through the doorway to the courtyard into the thick dark of the woods beyond then began to mosey towards my last miserable dance class and wished I could just Rip Van Winkle this shit. It would be nice to wake up twenty years from now and see that the world didn't need me to fix it. Or I'd wake up to a post-apocalyptic world where one species had brutalized the other into near extinction at a deadly cost. With that pleasant thought I threw myself into the world of music with all the glee of a jailbird flying free for the first time in decades. 

…...............................................................................  
Four Hours and Change Later

I swung the door open, a mushroom cloud of smoke billowing around me as I scrubbed the water from my hair. My hair was thick enough that if I didn't get as much water out of it as I could it would take hours to fully dry. Wet hair on silk or satin just didn't bode well. I flipped my hair back and nearly jumped out of my skin. Zero was draped across my bed. One leg hanging casually over the edge of the bed, the other bent at the knee. His shirt gaped open more than usual at the throat, three buttons undone instead of the typical two, exposing the beginning of all that finely tuned muscle underneath. His ever longer silver hair was splayed around his head and shoulders like a liquid silver halo. Those breathtaking silver-purple eyes were watching me watch him. A smile curled the corners of his mouth into something devious. He looked marvelous, all silver, white and black framed by the rich blue of my sheets. 

“You look like you're posed for a wandering photographer.” His smile widened but he remained quiet. I frowned and adjusted the towel under my arms. “What are you doing here, Zero?” He shrugged, a smooth roll of shoulders.

“Our conversation earlier was interrupted.” I glanced over to the door seeing the chair I had wedged under the knob still in place. The windows were closed. I had no idea how he kept getting in here, so I asked.

“How the fuck do you keep getting in here?” I gestured vaguely at the blocked door and he grinned, but that was it. For some reason he was really pissing me off right now. I shoved my anger down and tried to be reasonable. “I have to get dressed, Zero.” He leaned up on his elbows and cocked his head to the side with a coy smile. 

“Then proceed.” I frowned at him and crossed my arms under my breasts. 

“Maybe you'd like to pretend for a few minutes that you're a gentleman and, I don't know, turn the hell around?” His head went back as he laughed, a deep roll of sound that had me smiling. 

His chest and stomach muscles seized with his joy, straining the shirt. I swallowed hard, closed my eyes and shook my head before looking back at him. The room was beginning to feel a lot warmer and I knew I might not be able to keep control of myself around him. Not tonight. Maybe not ever. My body had reacted to him like this for what felt like forever, but these past few days had shown that things were different now. Whenever he's around me I can't focus on anything else, my body warms, aches to be close to him. 

I shook my head and only then noticed Zero staring at me. He had this curious smile on his face that seemed to ask, penny for your thoughts? I sighed and turned my back on him. He wouldn't turn away? Fine. I walked over to the armoire and let the towel slip off me as I pulled open the thick, solid wood of the doors. I felt his eyes on me as I knelt to get a pair of underwear from the drawer at the bottom. Only the sounds of me moving around punctuated the incredibly thick silence in the room. My breath came faster knowing he was watching me slip the black lace of the underwear up my thighs. Kaname had been quite the bad influence on my entire wardrobe. My underwear selection in particular. I don't think I owned a pair of panties that weren't lace, satin, silk, low-cut, skimpy or any combo of the lot. The underwear I wore now were a mere breath of lace covering only what decency demanded. I adjusted the thin line of lace over my hip, the string of the thong settling in place. It was too late for a bra when I'd just be going to bed soon. I wished like hell at that moment that I had at least one plain, long t-shirt instead of the slinky, albeit incredibly comfortable, pajamas that had found there way into my closet. I sighed, deciding that the satin shorts and tank top were more appropriate than the nearly nonexistent nightgown that could double as lingerie. The shorts were small, stopping an inch below my ass. The tank top cut short enough that my belly button was visible, the soft satin of the hem dancing against my skin as I moved around the room. His eyes never wavered and something about having his undivided attention just did it for me. 

I padded into the bathroom and hung the towels up, cleaned my ears, brushed my hair and when I walked out Zero was right where I'd left him. He'd been staring at the doorway where I'd disappeared. I stopped by the bedside table, two feet away from him, as I plugged my phone in. I smelled it then. Just barely there like a perfume lingering long after its owner was gone. I closed my eyes and breathed in the faint smell of his arousal. I fought against the shiver that threatened to creep up my spine. I turned and faced him. His eyes met mine and he seemed perfectly content to just lay there, watching me. His breathing was quick and shallow, lips slightly parted. I licked my lips.

“Did you have some purpose in coming here? Or did you come just to watch me?” 

“As much as I enjoy watching you I do have a purpose for being here.” I raised an eyebrow in question but he had fallen silent again. 

“Well?” I asked. Nothing. I fought the wave of agitation pushing in. “You stare at me a lot, now. Not like you used to.”

“You've changed a lot and aren't the same Yuki.” I frowned.

“What are you talking about?” His expression never changed as he spoke. 

“The old Yuki was soft, precious. What is it about these past five years that has hardened you so?” 

“Do you miss the old Yuki?” He shook his head. 

“You deflected my question.” I nodded. 

“You answer mine and I'll try to answer yours.” He cocked his head with a slight smile and suddenly sat up. 

“Fair enough.” I took a big step back and crossed my arms, waiting. The silence was thick, the kind of silence where you both have something to say but neither wants to squeal first. I sighed. I seemed to be doing a lot of that lately. 

“Fine. I guess I'll start since you asked first.” I paused and thought, really thought about how to convey in as few words as possible what had happened to me in the past five years. I laughed as the answer came to me. “I grew up.”

“What?” He frowned up at me and I couldn't help but smile. He was so cute when confused. 

“You asked what happened to me these past five years. The answer is, I grew up.”

“That's it?” His question fell flat between the two of us. I nodded.

“That's the shortest explanation.”

“I didn't ask for the shortest explanation.” 

“No. You want details that I don't feel inclined to share.”

“Well, maybe I don't feel inclined to answer your question either.” Anger spiked through me.

“I'm not in the mood for this tonight, Zero.”

“Just answer the question and I'll answer yours.” I felt my face set into hard, angry lines. 

“Why do you want to know so bad, Zero? So you can point fingers and call me a monster?” 

“Just answer the damned question, Yuki!” His voice was thick with his own anger.

“Fine. In this campaign Kaname and I have humbled ourselves in ways I can't, no won't, even begin to tell you. Do you want to know that I've had friends die in my arms? That we've all nearly died at least once? That every time we go out anywhere we run the risk of getting injured or killed. Do you want to know that we all put our lives on the line on a regular basis. I have killed, bled, cried, screamed and damn near whored myself for this fucking cause! Is that what you wanted to know, Zero?” He was so still, so quiet that my rapid breathing was nearly deafening. My heart raced at the memory of my friend's blood pouring over me, his life leaking away while I was powerless to stop it. I shook my head and gestured to the door. 

“You need to leave.”

“Yuki-”

“No.” I shook my head, eyes squeezed shut tight. “Leave.” He was so quiet I fought the urge to open my eyes to see if he was still there. I just stood there and breathed, trying to shove down the storm of emotions swirling inside me. 

“Who was it?” His voice came from right in front of me. I jumped back a foot, eyes still closed. I don't know why but I needed not to see him. I had a feeling that if I looked at him I'd break. 

“Who was what?” I asked.

“Don't make me say it, Yuki.” His voice was softer than it had been throughout our few but frequent encounters so far. An edge of the compassion of the old Zero threaded its way through his words. I swallowed past the hard lump forming in the back of my throat. 

“Akatsuki.” I spit the name out as if it burned my tongue on the way out. My heart squeezed tight for a moment. Tears burned my eyes. I didn't want to cry dammit! I was supposed to be stronger than this. I'd already done my crying for Akatsuki. 

“How did it happen?” My rage blurred my vision as my eyes snapped open. 

“Do you enjoy poking fun at my wounds, Zero?” The rage in my voice was scalding. He was quiet, the compassion in his eyes made my chest tighten. I closed my eyes again and turned my back on him. It was easier if I could pretend he wasn't watching me, waiting for me to speak. 

“Kaname caught on pretty quick and early on made it so that every guard never went without a partner. Hanabusa and Ruka were my guards to start with. We quickly realized that their personalities clashed too much for them to be effective partners. So Akatsuki replaced Hanabusa. For the first year they were who I spent most of my time with.” I paused and took a couple deep breaths. 

“Akatsuki was always so sympathetic to other people's emotional toil. In the beginning when I couldn't handle the constant moving, fighting and politicking he was the one who held me close and wiped away my sorrows. He healed me, fed me on occasion, held me when I cried, bled for me, laughed with me. Yet when I needed someone to tell me I was being a fool he still stepped up. He was never afraid to tell me I was being an ass, and he did it in the most frustratingly polite manner so that I couldn't bitch at him without feeling like a complete douche.” I smiled and the first tear slipped down my cheek. I angrily swiped it away. 

“What do you know of Kaname's political campaign, Zero?”

“Not much. I know that you and Kaname are suspected of fucking your way into a treaty with quite a few reputable politicians.” I smiled despite myself.

“They're not very reputable if they're accused of such lowly deeds now are they.” It was an emotionless statement that sounded cold even to me. 

“I know now that this thing you and he are doing is obviously much messier than I thought.” I scoffed.

“You could say that.” I turned to face him. “Do you know that there are vampires out there as well as humans that are skulking in the shadows plotting our demise? They don't like being known. They like things just the way they've always been.”

“So they're what? Attempting to kill you guys before this vampire/human treaty comes about?” I nodded. 

“The vampire hunter population has sky-rocketed and the most obvious targets are spotlit center stage. Between them and the vampires out to hunt us we are in constant danger.” 

“Okay.”

“This game of politics is a treacherous one.” He was quiet for a moment.

“What does this have to do with Akatsuki?” Just hearing Zero say his name so casually made my chest squeeze tight for a moment. I fought the tears burning up the back of my throat. 

“You really want to know?” He stared at me for a moment, a long, thorough, calculating stare. Finally he nodded. I took him at his word and began moving toward him. We were only feet apart so I was standing in front of him before he had time to do much more than frown in confusion. I reached my hands up to his face. His hands were suddenly around my wrists so that my hands looked incredibly small in his grasp. 

“What are you doing?” 

“You said you wanted to know.” He nodded.

“I did.” I smiled but it felt sad. 

“It's easier if I just show you.” I had only recently discovered about six months ago that I could share my memories and glimpse into other people's past through touch. Sometimes it happened by accident. If I was thinking too hard and was sitting too close to someone they were probably going to get a little peek into my brain. 

“What are you going to do?” I offered him a weak smile.

“I'm going to show you my last memory of him.” He was breathing hard as he stared into my eyes for all the world as if he was searching for an answer to some unasked question. 

“Yuki, I-” He froze in mid-sentence and for a moment I saw a real flash of pain in his eyes before he closed them and nodded, placing my hands on either side of his face. I didn't need to touch his face in particular, I just needed to touch him, but he didn't know that and I wasn't going to argue. His eyes opened so that he watched me. I thought about moving away and simply telling him. He didn't need to see what I'd seen.

His hands slipped slowly away from my wrists, falling to his sides as he stared at me, waiting. I could see the pulse racing in the side of his throat. He was scared and doing a damn good job of hiding it but wouldn't back down. Brave man. My fingers smoothed along his jaw, across his cheek bones so that my palms rested on his cheeks, fingertips resting in the silk of his hairline. If he was brave enough to try it I was brave enough to show him. 

I closed my eyes and let that part of myself that had never been human, the part of me that was innately magical, mystical, take over. My magic filled me, swirling along the underside of my skin in ways that I knew wasn't possible, a cool breeze on a sunny spring morning chasing my hair across my neck and face. I felt the exact moment my magic settled over Zero. He took a gasping breath and his entire body jerked right before a soft pop sounded through my head, a sound only I could hear, as I slipped into Zero's mind. I had to try real hard to not look into his brain, to only do what I was here to do but it was difficult. This power was new and relatively untested. No one really wanted someone rooting around in their brain, so consequently I had very little control over it. I could see in brilliant blue flashes, like lightning, memories among the vast ink black expanse that was his mind. It was hard to resist the temptation to immerse myself in those memories, to learn more of this man. I let the memory of that day sweep over me. I don't know why but when sharing memories with someone they became so clear, as if I were reliving them. I heard Zero groan as the rush of emotions and images flooded over us. 

We were surrounded. Every entrance was covered by steel panic doors, a fallout safety precaution. The knife sticking out of my side scraped against the underside of a rib. I winced as I plunged my short sword into the side of the neck of the woman riding me to the floor as she ground the knife in deeper. Blood sprayed from her throat in a hot rain against my face, throat and chest as arms ripped her away from me, tearing my blade through the soft flesh. 

Akatsuki was suddenly hovering over me, eyes doing a quick assessment of the damage before he whirled and intercepted a woman with one wicked looking blade. They rolled across the floor as I shoved myself to my feet. I heard a scream and looked to my right in time enough to see Ruka fall to her knees. I was suddenly slammed back into the wall behind me so hard I heard my ribs snap on impact. I was blindsided by a fist smashing into my face. Once, twice, three times. I brought my knife down but the thing on top of me snapped my forearm sending the knife clattering to the floor. I screamed as they ripped the knife out of my side. I didn't wait for them to plunge the blade home. I flung myself not away from them but into them, wrapping my body as tightly around them as I could. I felt my attacker hesitate for just a moment out of confusion before they realized the danger they were in. But it was too late. A moment had been all I'd needed. I sank all two inches and change of my battle fang into the soft flesh of their throat and worried at it. I tore huge chunks of flesh away so easily. Blood poured down the front of us as the sharp sound of my fangs snapping through their neck sounded. I had done so much damage so fast that my attacker only then fell to their knees. I unwound myself and was back on my feet allowing myself for a moment to watch the man's eyes, staring in wide-eyed panic up at me, glass over. 

I glanced around me and watched Rima fall to the floor, unconscious or dead, I didn't know. Seiren was a bloody lump on the floor not ten feet from me. The pale lavender of her hair was a rich purple as blood began to pool beneath her head. I saw a blur of something racing towards me and turned, knowing I was going to be too slow. I was suddenly knocked back on my ass as Akatsuki's body slammed my attacker from the side. They both went through the wall. A moment later Akatsuki came flying back through. He rolled to his feet as three men closed around him. I rushed forward, awkwardly fumbling my H&K from it's holster under my left arm with my left hand, my right hanging uselessly at my side. I fired point blank into the back of the enemy head closest to me. Akatsuki blinked away the brains and thicker things that splattered across his face as he grappled with a man much taller than himself. 

My shoulder suddenly went completely numb with a searing hot pain, my gun clunking onto the floor. I felt my eyes widen as the blood began to blossom where the bullet had entered. There was no more pain, just a numb uselessness that let me know I was hurt much worse than I thought. A woman stepped in front of me with a thin blade nearly as long as she was tall. Both of my arms were rendered useless, my vision was beginning to grey a little around the edges and the sounds of fighting were growing dim. The battle was almost over and something told me that this time, we might not be the victors. 

She grinned at me and winked before rushing me. I was already moving, trying to throw myself out of her way but I stumbled, a clumsy mistake that was about to cost me my life. I had a moment to realize that this was it and to wonder if Kaname had made it out. I accepted my fate as I watched that blade swing towards me and could do nothing. I had all the time in the world to see death coming and no time to bargain with him. Right as I thought the blade was going to strike my world spun and I felt no pain to accompany the sound of blade piercing flesh. I was shoved forward landing painfully on my useless arms. I ignored the waves of pain now sweeping over and through me and quickly rolled onto my back. I watched in horror as that thin blade slipped out the front of Akatsuki. The blood didn't start to well from the wound until she jerked it free of him, proving just how sharp the blade was. His eyes widened a second before I watched her blade explode out of his chest a second time, point towards the ceiling. Blood began pouring in a steady stream down his chin as he fell to his knees, jerking the blade up through him a little further. I saw her behind him trying to jerk the blade free from the confines of his ribcage. She'd spitted him in an upwards angle, going for the heart so with a blade that long it would take some finagling to remove. A scream built at the back of my throat, tears forming a lump that acted as a temporary gag. She had almost freed her sword when her head exploded in a spray of meat, blood and gore. I scrambled toward Akatsuki. I yanked the blade out of him with my left hand, forgetting the gunshot wound, and fell to the floor under his weight as he collapsed against me. I rolled him onto his side to keep him from choking on his own blood, pulling as much of him into my lap as I could. Tears blurred my vision as I frantically searched through my mind for something, anything to do. He coughed, splattering blood across me, but I didn't care. My chest hurt as his panicked eyes rolled up to me. His lips were moving but I couldn't tell what he was trying to say. I shook my head.

“I can't hear you, Kat.” I shook my head as he tried again and the real tears came. “Kat, I can't hear you.” I shoved my wrist into his fangs against his mouth. “Drink, Kat.” He pulled away, blood pouring from his mouth as he choked. If only I could get him to drink some of my blood I might be able to heal some of his internal wounds. I might be able to save him. His body began to shake against mine as his fingers dug into my waist and thighs. 

“Please! Drink from me, Akatsuki! Let me save you!” He shook his head as he stared up at me and if he hadn't been choking on blood I might have sworn he smiled at me. The first glint of that glassy sheen was creeping around the edges of those burnt-orange eyes. The orange-brown of his hair was lost, made into something the color of a rich wood, sticky with blood beneath my fingers as I pushed it away from his face. My tears dropped down onto his face as I tried once more to feed him. He turned his face into my lap and squeezed tighter where he gripped me. I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me. 

“You better not leave me! I can save you, Akatsuki. Let me save you!” I knew for sure he smiled at me now and the first sob escaped my lips as his shaking fingers brushed my cheek. My eyes widened, breathing quickening as he told me, not in words but in emotions, one last goodbye. I felt his magic rush over me on a warm summer wind, chasing my hair away from my face. I felt for one moment all the complexities of his heart. He gave it all to me, holding nothing back. I drowned in the depths of his final moments and knew it would never be enough as his heart slowed with each rush of emotion. I held his body against mine and wept at the loss of so much. Passion, love, regret, respect, devotion, admiration, fear, longing. A storm of emotions that swept faster and faster until that final meaty staccato sounded. I stopped breathing as I stared down into the strangely peaceful depths of those beautiful eyes and felt his heart cease. My heart stuttered. His final words whispered through my mind as the sun set behind the glassy sheen of death. 

“Fight, my queen. Fight!” I stared in disbelief for a moment, jerking in shock as I was abruptly cut off from everything he had once been, everything I had felt. I felt him slip away and could do nothing but hold onto his shell and cry. I rocked him in my arms as his still warm blood leaked over me and fought the scream in my throat. Fought the pain, tried to ignore my heart fracturing, imploding from the weight of so much grief. 

I tore away from the memory, jerking away from Zero. I staggered back a step, eyes wide with the fresh pain of Akatsuki's death. At some point Zero had fallen to his knees, head tipped back so he was staring at me. He watched me fall to my knees and wrap my arms around my stomach as if I could hold in all that pain. I swallowed a scream and tried to hate him for doing this to me. I tried to hate Zero in that moment. I fumbled to my feet, staggering back a step, and uselessly swiped angrily at the tears steadily leaking down my face. Zero stared at me with wide, pain filled eyes, darkened to a near solid purple with my anguish, one palm rubbing his chest over his heart. I watched him cry for me for the first time ever and felt my heart break all over again. I shoved the back of my hand against my mouth and spun away from him. I couldn't see that look on his face because it made me want to scream. 

“Yuki, I-” His voice was thick with tears, my tears, my pain. I shook my head and cleared my throat. I closed my eyes and shoved that pain down, forced it back into that little black box in the back of my mind. I took a few deep breaths. 

“Yuki-”

“Don't. Whatever you're going to say, just don't.” He made some small noise in his throat that sounded too much like pain for my comfort. I turned around and cocked my head, brow furrowing in confusion. He wouldn't look at me, staring intently at the floor as he rubbed his chest above where his heart was. 

“Was this the only one?” His voice was choked with the pain I knew he felt. I swallowed hard and willed myself not to cry. 

“No.” The word was clipped, harsh and cold. He looked up at me from his knees on the floor and shook his head, face crumbling into something I couldn't handle right now. I whirled away so that I was staring at the door.

“Please don't do that.” The tears were thick in my voice. 

“Yuki-” I squeezed my eyes shut tight and shook my head.

“Yuki?” His voice was closer now and I felt a fine trembling begin in my muscles. I shook my head harder. 

“Stop.” It was just a whisper of sound because any louder and I'd start yelling. 

“It's okay.” I was shaking my head non-stop now. “Yuki.” I jumped and fought to stay put as his voice sounded from right in front of me. His hands gripped my face, forcing me to stop shaking my head. He moved until he caught my eyes. I was breathing too fast, eyes too wide. My heart was racing. “It's okay. Scream.” I swallowed hard past the scream in question at the back of my throat, nearly choking me now. I had to swallow three times before I could speak.

“If I start screaming now I might never stop.” One hot tear rolled down my cheek to accompany my whispered words, squeezed out under too much pressure. A single crystalline tear carved its way down his face. 

“Scream, Yuki.” There was a gruff edge to his voice like he was talking around something. I yanked away from him and moved towards the bed. I ripped my hand repeatedly through my hair as I paced rapidly around the room trying to get my shit under control. I stared out the window until the numbness that follows a really good crying session settled over me. We were quiet for so long I thought Zero might have left.

“He loved you.” I nodded.

“I know.” A brief silence settled over us again before he spoke.

“How many? Who else have you lost?” 

“Hideki, Airi, Jean, Izumi, Juro, Kenichi, Luca, Kokoro, Madoka, Makato, Meiko, Gregoir. The list goes on.” 

“I don't recognize any of those names.”

“No. I don't suppose you would. Most of them are vampires and humans that found there way into our employ after all of this began.” My voice sounded so cold, so detached. 

“You have lost much.” 

“Too much.”

“Is it worth it?” I turned and looked at him because I realized I didn't know how to answer that question. I think I'd seen too much too fast, lost too much. Some things took pieces of you, some larger than others, but if you let it life would eat you alive. I was probably missing most of my viscera at this point. I gave him the only answer I had.

“I'm not sure anymore.” 

“Then why fight?”

“Because I have to.”

“Why you?” I tried to smile but I don't think it was successful. 

“If not me and Kaname then who? If not now then when, Zero?” He didn't seem to know what to do with my answer. 

“No. I can't accept that.” I raised my eyebrows at him.

“Oh? And why-ever not?” He shook his head, face screwing up like he had a bitter flavor in his mouth. 

“Why does this have to be your battle? Why take on so much when you don't have to?” The first warmth of anger stirred through me. 

“Why? Why you ask? Tell me Zero, how much death is enough? We wade through life knee deep in the blood of our friends, allies, family members. We allow this war between hunter and vampire to twist us into something that we needn't be.” 

“Bullshit.”

“Really? Bullshit is it?” I sneered at him and stepped forward. “Do you own a mirror, Zero?”

“Of course I do.”

“You should try using it every once in a while.” His face twisted into the passively angry mask he'd presented to me since I'd returned. 

“What is that supposed to mean?” I laughed a quick burst of sound.

“You are the perfect example of everything I'm fighting against.”

“I don't understand.”

“You and the rest of the world.” Anger and confusion chased across his face in equal measure. I sighed and moved past him to sit on the foot of my bed. Exhaustion pulled at me, the kind that makes you want to curl up and die for like a week. 

“'There ain't no rest for the wicked.'” I mumbled to myself.

“What?” I shook my head. 

“I'm tired, Zero.” I left off the part where I asked him to leave but thought it was pretty obvious. Apparently it wasn't because he stood there and stared at me. “You said you came here for something. What was it?” 

“Nothing of importance. I'll leave you to rest.” He removed the chair from under the doorknob and began unlocking it. Maybe he was as exhausted as I was or maybe he just didn't want to reveal his secrets but I watched him unbar the door and wondered again how he kept getting into my room. If I hadn't been so tired I might have insisted on knowing why he'd come to me but honestly at that moment I wanted nothing more than for him to leave. 

“How many of your friends and allies have to die before you'll see how futile this is? If you let your heart break too many times there will be nothing left to enjoy this world you're trying to build, Yuki. Don't be so careless.” 

“It would be careless beyond the measure of words if I didn't try, Zero. Why can't you see this?” 

“Men have always killed one another, all they ever need is an excuse. Being human alone makes one target enough. Being a vampire?” He laughed. “It's too easy, Yuki. Vampires give them something to hate without reason, to kill without mercy. They will unify against us, the humans will. The old adage, the enemy of my enemy is my friend, rings ever more true. It is only a matter of time before they rise up, prouder than ever of their humanity, browbeating, slaughtering us in the name of ignorance. You might not see it now but you will.” With that he closed the door, solidly behind him. I stared where he just was and fumed. 

I had seen just what he'd so explicitly summarized. I'd lived through such things. A part of me wanted to believe that this dream of peace, and eventually equality, that Kaname believed in could become reality. I wanted to believe it. I needed to believe in it to keep fighting. But the larger, more rational, part of me was screaming to run. Hide. The humans were coming. I feared that they would do just what Zero assumed they would. History has proven his theory right again and again when it was just human vs. human. Why should it be wrong now?

Why? I needed it to be right. I, Kaname and the rest of us, needed to believe that we could be other than the monster they thought us to be. I needed to believe. I needed it, almost more than my next breath. I needed to believe that humans could overcome their never-ending hatred towards anything they were ignorant of. The alternative meant the destruction of everything I held dear. I couldn't, absolutely could not, accept that.

….............................................................................  
The Night of the Halloween Dance

I groaned as I twirled in the full length mirror for the hundredth time. The dress wasn't bulky nor did it have very many layers, just two. I'd thought about dressing as Elphaba but quickly decided against it when I'd seen how heavy the fabric was, not to mention the endless layering that gave the dress the slightly puffed out, signature look. I scoffed in disgust as Ruka adjusted the laces down my spine that held the dress closed.

“I should have just gone with Lysistrata.” I mumbled mournfully. “It would have been so much easier. Where am I supposed to hide my weapons in this?” The bodice was tight enough that I couldn't wear a bra and it both lifted my breasts up like some creamy offering and held them perfectly in place. Amazing really. I'd love the dress if the sleeves weren't also skin tight. I was almost certain that the cloak that went with the dress would be taken at the door so there was no way to put a spine sheath on without it being noticed. 

The dress was of the kind that cascaded from the hips to the floor in a pool of cloth that hid the feet completely and you either had to lift it to walk or trip endlessly and ruin it. The deep garnet red of the velvet was accented by the black silk that framed the mounds of my breasts and spilled down in a sharp V ending just below where my thighs met. Vines the red of blood spilled across moonbeams twisted and curled through all that dark silk. Black vines of silk twined around my hips, spilling down my thighs, glimmering with every shift of the light, as if they could pour down my body so that when I walked it appeared as if they flowed around me. It was by any definition a truly amazing dress and in almost any other circumstance I would absolutely love to wear it. 

“Why is it that fashion and safety are almost never simpatico?”I watched Ruka roll her eyes in the mirror as she finished lacing the bodice. “If I'd have dressed as Lysistrata I'd be wearing one layer with plenty of places to hide my weapons.” 

“If you'd dressed as Lysistrata I think you'd be sending the wrong message.” I turned to face her, ready to be angry. She held her hands up in mock surrender with a silent smirk stretching those full lips. “Dressing as a women who brandished sex as her ultimate weapon to end war when you and Lord Kaname are already suspected of similar deeds would only confirm such inclinations among the humans. Not to mention the mad frenzy the media would be in. You're already either a monster or a sex object in their eyes. What do you think would happen if the two weren't separated?” She raised her eyebrows to punctuate her question and stood from where she'd had to kneel to finish lacing my gown. I crossed my arms under my breasts and glared at her. She was right, which was what made me so damned mad. 

“You know that's actually not a bad idea. Maybe we should follow Lysistrata's example. If we got every woman to ransom sex for the demise of war...hmmmmm...” I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling and feigned a contemplative look. “This has possibilities!” Ruka's eyes were wide.

“You cannot be serious.” I fought to keep a very straight face as I met her incredulous gaze. 

“What? We'd achieve the unachievable. At minimum, a week, I'd say six months max before world-peace was a reality, not just a cliché pageant queen line.” Her mouth was hanging open, a look of abject horror twisting her face. The fight to keep a straight face was almost too much. “The alternative is a lifetime of blue balls, masturbation or sodomy. Hmmmmmm...” 

“I can't tell if you're serious. Please, tell me you're not serious!” I couldn't hold it in any longer. I dissolved into a near hysterical bout of laughter that ended with me doubled over, clutching at my stomach. I shook my head and wiped away the tears streaming down my face. Ruka was glaring at me, shaking her head.

“You should not joke about such things, Yuki.”

“Oh, lighten up Ruka! It was just a joke.” She gently took my arm and began walking me towards the chair in front of the giant vanity.

“You jest about things that are not laughing matters.” I shook my head and snickered.

“Whatever you say, Ruka.” She pushed me down into the chair with only a little force and I diligently sat still beneath her attentions as she primped and painted me for the night's events. After fifteen minutes of her applying things I could only guess at how to use she stepped back and gestured for me to look in the mirror. I knew I was wearing quite a bit of make-up but it was so well done that unless you had seen her apply it you might not think I was wearing much of anything. It was all so perfectly under-done, an accent here or there. The most noticeable were the shiny ruby red of my lips and my already large eyes made larger by the eyeliner and mascara she'd applied. A very nice shade of some shimmery gray eye-shadow was blended outwards so that the even chocolate brown of my eyes shone with a promise of a more exotic beauty. My hair, which had grown so long now that it tickled across my thighs just under my ass, was curled in gorgeous auburn ringlets that cascaded around my face, down my shoulders to bounce at about mid-back. I leaned forward in the mirror and gently traced the tips of my fingers down the side of my face, unable to believe I could ever look this pretty. 

“Wow.” I breathed in disbelief. I turned to look at Ruka and smiled. “You did an amazing job!” She smiled and dipped her head coyly.

“Thank you.” She mumbled. I stood and walked over to her.

“No really, I love it! You are amazing at this stuff!” She shrugged and turned, walking to the pile of things strewn across my bed, rummaging around for something. 

“I've had a lot of time to practice.” She was walking back to me with the last piece to my costume in her hands when a knock sounded on the door. She handed me the silver crown of interwoven flowers and walked to the door. I couldn't help but watch as she moved. When she opened the door she froze.

“Wow...” I don't think she meant to say that because she turned to face me a little too quickly and began strutting towards me again. I saw Zero standing in the doorway behind her, watching as she moved away from him with a raised eyebrow. He moved into the room and closed the door behind him. When he turned back around he still had eyes only for Ruka who was moving around the room putting make-up and clothes away, anything to keep busy. 

“And I thought my costume was risque.” I heard the words but I couldn't fully comprehend them while I looked him over. 

The first thing I noticed was that his beautiful silver hair was some shimmery, light blue that combined with the metallic color of his own hair was simply breathtaking. He had all that hair gelled and hair-sprayed so that it went back from his face in a sort of windblown effect. There were four sections of hair in the front draped down his forehead and I could see that the hair at the base of his skull was decorating the pale skin of his neck like forgotten pieces. Maybe he was just that fresh out the shower or it was an effect of the gel but his hair still appeared wet. There was a pale green make-up only under his eyes, fanning out from his bottom lid in what looked like a mockery of bat wings. The blue of his hair combined with the green of the make-up made his lavender eyes startlingly beautiful. Just under the eye makeup of his right eye was the bone white of his jaw, no, not his jaw. It couldn't be his jaw. I took several steps towards him without thinking so that I could get a better look. I stifled my sigh of relief at seeing that it was just a very intricately, amazingly well-done painted on depiction of a massive set of monster teeth, much smaller than his own. The coloring and shadows were convincingly done so that it looked damned near real. 

I forced myself to stop staring at that massive, boney jaw, moving on to the rest of the costume and I think my heart nearly stopped. He wore nothing but a white hakama with a black sash, slung dangerously low on his hips and a ragged, white, crop-top jacket with a black interior and an upturned collar that gaped open around the lithely muscled expanse of his chest, stomach and hips, covering very little. Around his belly button was a medium sized, perfectly round black dot, big enough to put a large fist through. At his left hip was a Katana in a sheath some metallic color between a purple like the lavender of his eyes and the blue of his hair. The pommel was very simply done, the silver of the metal peeking through the course material, the same color as the sheath, used for gripping it. If I knew Zero the sword would be authentic and lethal. My mouth went dry at the sight of all that creamy flesh exposed, framed for my viewing. All it would take is undoing that sash and all he had to offer would be right there for the taking. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard, shoving that thought away as hard as I could. 

I opened my eyes and couldn't help but smile. As enthralled as I'd been with his costume Zero seemed helpless against my own. His eyes were incredibly wide, mouth hanging halfway open and if he was breathing a little heavily, well...I would try not to use my new found powers for evil. Ruka moved past him carrying an armful of clothes and casually reached up and closed his mouth without breaking stride. I couldn't help but laugh as Zero jumped a little and followed her with his eyes until she disappeared into the closet, quickly returning to me. He swallowed hard before clearing his throat, hands going to the lapels of his jacket as if he were going to attempt to straighten it, despite there being so little of it. I smiled at him and moved forward putting a little extra sway into my hips, the four inch heels beneath the dress made it an easy task. I don't know why I did it but the look on his face was so worth it. I stopped just in front of him and could hear his heart racing now. I flicked my eyes down the bare expanse of his chest before eyeing the marvelously done paint job on his face. 

“Kyko, one of the art students volunteered to do it for me when she recognized who I was dressed as. She was really excited to put her talents to 'practical use'.” I could hear the air quotes around the last. I eyed the taught, lithe muscles exposed before me and looked back up at him with a smirk and a raised eyebrow. 

“Oh, I'm sure she was.” He frowned at me and it was so cute I almost laughed again. “Who are you supposed to be?” 

“Grimmjow.”

“Who?” He offered me a smile and my heart skipped a beat seeing that his fangs were slightly extended.

“He's a character from Bleach.”

“What's that?” He looked surprised for a moment before he dissolved into one of his incredibly rare laughing bouts. Ruka was just coming out of the closet and froze a lock of astonishment and awe on her face as she watched Zero. I didn't blame her. He was breathtaking when he wore this look of unexpected joy. I stopped breathing and just admired him in the moment, allowed the deep contralto of his laugh to roll of me and I found myself smiling along with him. 

“You really should try to relax occasionally and watch some TV or something.” His face was still bright with the afterglow of laughing, voice thick with it. I saw Ruka shake her head hard as she moved past us, like she was trying to shake the image out of her mind. He moved closer to me and all I could do was stare up at him like a deer caught in headlights as he took the silver crown from my hands, rolling it around in his hands, twisting it between his fingers as he eyed it. 

“This is quite beautiful.” I nodded.

“Kaname had it made to go with the costume. He had all of our costumes custom made. It is very magnificent.” I said the last as if it were more a side note. He nodded while looking down at the crown before meeting my eyes, so ordinary next to the extraordinary metallic lavender of his own. He moved a step closer so that our bodies were nearly touching and gently placed the crown upon my head, fingers brushing across my hair as he stepped back. 

“Not as magnificent as the woman wearing it.” I felt a blush burn up my neck into my face and his eyes lit up with the brilliant smile that stretched those lush pale pink lips. 

“Is it time?” Ruka's voice sounded from right behind me, startling me. Zero nodded and broke my gaze to look at her. 

“You look amazing, Ruka.” Whatever expression was on Ruka's face widened Zero's smile into something beautific once again. I wanted to turn and look but knew she would hate that so I stayed where I was. 

“Is it time, Zero?” Her voice was a little unsteady, something I'd never heard. I turned to see Ruka's gorgeous face flushed, a nervous smile lighting her eyes, a brown similar to my own. It was almost as if she didn't know how to operate in the face of this new, happy Zero. I was reminded that Ruka hadn't ever seen this side of him. No one had really. Except me and even I only saw it once in a great while. Zero must be in a rare mood indeed to be so openly joyous in front of anyone else. For some reason I didn't like or trust this new side of Zero.

“Yes.” He offered her a simple response and she nodded in return.

“Hanabusa?”

“Kaname called and had him go to the dance ahead of us to make sure that everything was safe and in order. I'm to escort Yuki to the dance with you.” She nodded then looked at me.

“Are you ready, Lady Yuki?” 

“Almost.” I turned away from them both and walked over to the bed where only Artemis remained. 

I bent over and grabbed two large handfuls of the dress and hiked it up, kicking my leg up on the bed exposing a long line of my right leg and the heels I'd chosen to go with the costume. Ruka had advised I get taller heels so that the dress didn't drag on the floor too much so here I was in four inch heels. We'd been practicing and learning dances for this damned thing for a week so there had damned straight better be some dancing. Following that logic I'd opted to by something with a thicker heel and a one inch platform. The heels were a solid black velvet with straps as broad as my pinky twining halfway up my calf. They looked great and were actually quite comfortable, or maybe I was just getting used to wearing heels finally.   
The bodice of the dress was tight enough that I was forced to bend at the waist as I strapped on Artemis' thigh holster. I would have strapped it to my calf if I thought there would be no chance of flashing her tonight, but for some reason I simply didn't think that was possible. So I strapped her to my upper thigh. If I really needed her tonight in any kind of time sensitive situation I was going to be so fucked. 

I turned my head to see both Ruka and Zero watching me. Ruka seemed to appreciate my caution and Zero...well, his face showed me a lot of things that I couldn't afford to contemplate right now. When I had both feet firmly planted on the floor and the dress fell perfectly once again I sashayed past them, snatching the rich, light velvet cloak off the full length mirror, stopping in front of the door to the room, one hand on the knob. I looked at them both over my shoulder with a coy smile. 

“You coming?” They both jerked forward at the same time and I smiled as I turned, opening the door and walking through it. Maybe I could have some fun tonight after all. As we walked Ruka took the lead and Zero naturally fell in line behind me as if he did this regularly. I just prayed to whoever was listening that nothing got blown up, no one got hurt or killed and under it all was the shallow hope that maybe I might get to undo the sash twined so teasingly around Zero's taught waist. I chastised myself for such thoughts as we walked and instead occupied the time between the dorm and the dance by watching Ruka's ass sway in her oh so tight outfit. It was after all too perfect a view to pass up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N- Alright guys and gals! Once again, I apologize for how long it took me to update. Things have been pretty crazy for me. I do so love this damn show! I've finished it for a second time and still cannot believe they ended it that way. GAH! I comfort myself by believing they ended it that way intentionally, keeping us Fanfic folks in mind so they could see all the interesting shit we would come up with. I apologize in advance of any outraged reviews for the demise of Akatsuki. That was really painful for me to write and even more painful for Yuki and Zero. 
> 
> The next update shouldn't take nearly as long but with chapters as long as these its the editing that's the real bitch. So, I hope to have the next installment to you as soon as possible! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I'd love to hear what you all think so far. Ciao for now, my lovelies!
> 
> P.S. I had waaaaaaaay too much fun with the costumes! ;-D


	3. Chapter 3

I was, for the twentieth time tonight, swaying in the arms of a man I was unfamiliar with, laughing that high-pitched, falsely amused sound when required, smiling and making polite conversation. If my life depended on it I couldn't tell you the name of the man in my arms. He was just another handsomely aged politician trying to figure out how I played the game. 

My lunch with Mr. Moto had gone spectacular as far as I was concerned. It was the dance that was the object of my worry. Moto saw the benefit to perfecting the model of neutral vampire/human relations that Cross academy represented and agreed to explore the idea of expanding with his full support if we could only perfect the original model. As a result of our new tentative partnership we left the National Diet building, where he'd met with his cabinet earlier in the day, with me at his side. He'd made an impromptu press conference where our new friendship was made public as well as what we hoped to accomplish. He declared his attendance of the Halloween Dance at Cross Academy to be the first step in cementing his support for neutral vampire/human relations. So, consequently my progress with the Prime Minister of Japan was an international headline and now not only was the head honcho of the Japanese government in attendance but a good fraction of his cabinet as well. I'd tried to convince him to reconsider coming to the dance but he'd hear none of it, something about keeping his word and pride. The media frenzy was barely being contained at the gates to the academy and I'd managed to piss off quite a lot of Buffy wannabes by “brainwashing” their head of state with my “devil-whore magic” among other much more colorful things. I was so caught up in thinking about the powder keg we were sitting on top of that I had completely forgotten the man I was dancing with. About the time I realized this another man tapped my partner on the shoulder putting our twirling to a sudden stop. 

“May I have this dance?” Mr. Moto, speak of the devil, smiled nicely at the man who dipped his head and bowed deeply, hands now firmly at his sides rather than inching closer to my ass. 

The man fled as if he had somewhere important to be and then My new friend and I were spinning and twisting together at a rapid pace across the floor to some very upbeat Halloween tune talking about ghosts under the bed or something. We didn't talk with words, only our bodies, moving together in an oddly rhythmic, smooth dance. I could feel my face flush from the fast movements and found myself smiling at him. He was smiling back, eyes shining with some quiet joy. The song ended and it was only when the room exploded in applause that I realized we were the only ones on the dance floor. We both laughed breathlessly. He took my left hand in his and we bowed together. It wasn't until we were almost off the floor that people started filtering back onto it. We went and got a hard plastic cup of juice from the punch bowl. He was raising it to his mouth when I put my hand across the top of it. He stopped with his lips nearly touching the back of my fingers, staring at me with a raised eyebrow clearly waiting for an explanation. I stepped a bit closer to him so that he could hear me over the music. 

“I do not think you coming here was a good idea, Mr. Moto.” He lowered the cup, both eyebrows inching closer up towards his hairline. 

“Oh? Really? Wasn't it your idea to announce as soon as possible my support for your, our, cause?” I nodded.

“Yes, but I did not mean for it to happen today.” He smiled at me. 

“Why put off for tomorrow what you can do today?”

“Do you not see the danger to you being here? With today’s announcement we managed to send the media off the deep end of the crazy pool, which can be a huge danger all on its own. Add in the fact that we also pissed off every wannabe vampire slayer and vampire hunter in pretty much the whole damned world and we may as well be sitting on a massive powder keg.” He seemed to be thinking pretty seriously about what I'd just said. 

“I can see why you would be concerned.”

“Really? I don't think you do. Five out of the nineteen members of your cabinet are with you here and you are the first head of state to all out throw in your support with the Coalition for Human and Vampire Relations. Like it or not you just put a big fucking target on you and your cabinet.” He tried to lift his cup to his lips again in a nervous gesture but I deftly took it from him. He watched me with a look of near confusion as I lifted his cup until it was an inch below my nose and sniffed it. I stared directly into his eyes as I did this, knowing very well how inhuman the gesture was. He swallowed hard as I lifted it to my lips and gingerly took a sip. I smiled as I handed it back to him.

“No poison.” He stared down into his cup as if trying to separate each element in it with his eyes. 

“You think it would have escalated this quickly?” He asked while still looking into his cup. 

“I think you underestimate the number of people there are in this world who hate vampires. We represent a great many things for the human public and there are many that see everything we are as a challenge to everything they are, everything they practice, live and love. To others we are heroes, idols, something to love, revere, respect and fear. But however many love us there are more that hate us because they fear what they don't know, nor do they wish to know. They are the most dangerous and today we provided fuel to fire their blind hatred. You must be more careful, Mr. Moto or I fear our partnership will not last long.” He looked up at me and whatever he saw in my face finally put fear in those black little eyes of his. 

“Are you trying to scare me?” I could hear an edge of anger hiding under all that fear.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because fear will make you cautious and caution will keep you alive.” He nodded too often and too fast as if he understood what I was saying completely but he was too scared to be able to do much more than nod. I stepped a little closer so that I could lean into him as I spoke, making sure that what I was about to say would be heard above everything going on around us. 

“I think we should get you and your people out of here, now.” He looked into my eyes from about a half a foot away and seemed to be contemplating something. I stared back, waiting. Whatever he saw he must have liked because he offered me a broad smile and nodded once. 

“Our people.” I cocked my head to the side. 

“What?”

“We are partners now so, our people.” I stared into his eyes and couldn't help but to think that I might be the cause of his demise.

“Do you have a family, Mr. Moto? A wife? Kids?” He frowned at me.

“A wife, my second, two daughters and a son. Why?” 

“Because I want there to be no misunderstandings between us, Mr. Moto. By partnering with me and my husband you are putting yourself in grave danger. I have lost more friends and allies to this cause already than I wish to name.” He looked down at the floor like he was thinking through something he didn't wish me to see. He was quiet for a few moments while he inspected the hardwood beneath our feet. When he looked up into my face I saw a hard resolve, the same look he had greeted me with when I'd met him for lunch earlier. 

“Nothing worth fighting for comes without risk. And you may call me Dai, partner.” I could do nothing but stare at him as worry, joy, fear and respect fought for dominance within me. I finally smiled at him. Brave, Mr. Moto. I nodded.

“And you may call me, Yuki.” The smile he offered me was brilliant and for a moment I could see the man he might have been a decade earlier, a man that was charming, smart and above all precious. I could totally see why he was elected for a second term. I smiled back at him and we had a silent moment where we both saw the danger ahead of us and still charged headlong towards it, a guy moment where we understood each other without the aide of words or emotion. 

“Now how do we get our people out of here with as little incident as possible.” That he knew we were all in danger and might be hurt tonight made me respect him more. I looked away from him, searching the room for Ruka or Hanabusa. Ruka caught my eye across the room and without a single motion she began making her way over to us. I looked back at the man before me and I simply had to know. 

“Why are you suddenly so supportive of our cause, Dai? You rejected my husbands proposal for an alliance, why now?” His response was quick, almost too automatic as if he had practiced it.

“My term as Prime minister is coming to an end and I wish to be known for something great.” I thought about his response, eyed the man before me. I shook my head, tasting the lie behind his words.

“Do you take me for a fool, Dai? What is the real reason?” His face was contemplative and entirely too serious. 

“I would never take you for a fool, Yuki.” He raised an eyebrow at me and slightly cocked his head with a small smile peeking at the corner of his mouth. “Lord Kuran would have taken my answer at face value.”

“I am not my husband.” His smile grew until I thought his face might split from it.

“No. You are not.” He was silent for a long minute before his face fell into deeply saddened lines. 

“My son is engaged to a vampire woman. I hated their union at first, tried to talk him out of it by threatening to take everything away from him, his inheritance, the family name, everything.” I nodded in encouragement and it seemed to be just what he needed. He took a deep breath and continued. 

“My wife arranged a dinner and threatened to divorce me if I didn't at least try to meet our sons future wife. The moment they arrived I knew I had lost. You should have seen the way they looked at each other.” He shook his head and genuinely smiled. “It was simply beautiful. I tried to be pissed at him. I tried to hate her. The truth is...she's a lovely woman. Well mannered, well spoken, smart as a whip, beautiful and when she laughs you can't help but join her. Other than the fact that she can't bear his children she is perfectly wonderful.” He shook his head. “My only son will never father grand-children, Yuki.” He looked into my eyes and I saw the tears building in his own. “Do you know how that feels?” I thought the question was rhetorical so I didn't answer.

“Well? Do you?” I shook my head.

“No, I don't.” He looked away out into the swaying crowd on the dance floor. 

“I thought I would hate their union, but the way they are together...it's simply magic. Every touch means more than the last.” He looked back at me, the first tear breaking free to trail down his cheek. “What kind of father would I be if I didn't support his happiness?” I smiled at him. “I want him to be happy, Yuki. I want to be a good, supportive father.” He took a deep shuddering breath. “The union between vampire and human is not recognized by the law and especially by the church of almost any faith.” He shook his head hard enough that I felt one of his tears plop onto the sleeve of my dress. “I need to change that, and I only have a limited time to do it.” He suddenly gripped my forearms gently in his hands, eyes wide as he stared into my own. “I need you to help me do this. I just know that we can do this together. You don't owe me anything, I know that, but together we can do this. Our union can catalyze change in the East.” His eyes as they stared into mine seemed almost desperate, pleading for me to tell him that yes, we could do it. I sent a prayer up to the heavens, to anyone who cared listen, that I wouldn't fail him, that I wouldn't have to explain to his wife and family why I brought a corpse home to them. 

“We'll do it together.” He made a sound somewhere between gratitude and joy as he clasped both my hands between his and bowed his forehead over them until his head nearly rested on our joined hands. He stood up and nodded in gratitude to me. Just then Ruka walked up. He pulled his hands out of mine after one last solid squeeze, turning to face the woman in front of us. 

“Lady Yuki.” She was very formal about it, waiting for me to tell her what to do with calm, perfectly patient eyes. I took a moment to look over how her costume framed her every asset. She wore a full-body, one-piece, solid, deep blue, leather suit that was half-way unzipped over her breasts, showing an ample amount of cleavage. The suit was skin tight, accenting her every curve, covering everything while curiously leaving little to the imagination. Her two and a half inch, black boots climbed up her long legs stopping just under her knees, blending seamlessly into the blue of the suit. Her incredibly long blond hair was straightened and pulled back into a ponytail at the base of her skull, leaving her face exposed in strong, gorgeous lines, emphasizing the full pout of that lush pink mouth. Her face was stunning without an ounce of make-up but tonight she had added only two things; a deep pink lipstick and mascara that curled her lashes into a solid curtain of black around those light chocolate eyes, turning them into something extraordinary to behold. She was breathtakingly sexy in the uncharacteristically bold outfit. The costume left her with no options to carry weapons but I trusted that if the situation called for it, she'd be able to defend me and anyone else. I had seen her hand-to-hand. She moved with a liquid grace and mind-boggling speed that was devastating. Weapons were fun but completely unnecessary. She was lethal without them. I turned to face her alone.

“We need to get Mr. Moto and his cabinet members out of here with as little incident as possible.” She nodded.

“Where is Hanabusa?” 

“Doing a perimeter check of the building.”

“As soon as he is back our top priority is to get Mr. Moto and our people out of here.”

“Understood.” She turned around and looked out into the crowd. She made some hand gesture and three men, not ours, began making their way over. By the formal black suits they wore I knew they were Dai's men. The rich copper scent of blood suddenly crept up my nose and kicked me in the brain, thick enough that I could taste it at the back of my throat. Ruka whirled and was reaching for me when the first gunshot sounded. No one in the gym seemed to care, none of them knew anything was wrong, not yet. It was times like these that made me wonder how humans could not smell, taste things on the air, how they couldn't hear, not like we could. Sometimes I wondered how I had survived as human for as long as I had. I grabbed Dai by the upper arm and began hustling him towards the back exit. Ruka was right behind and to the left of me. 

“Ruka raise the alarm, get as many people out of here as you can but it is imperative that we get Mr. Moto and his cabinet members to safety. Do whatever you have to do.” She was suddenly in front of me, blocking my path forward. 

“My first priority is getting you to safety, Lady Yuki.” I felt my face fall into hard lines, my commander face. She shook her head hard a firm, quick motion. 

“You are our Lady, we follow you and our lord and no one else. No one's life holds as much value as yours.” Lord and Lady were the vampire equivalent of King and Queen. I stepped forward until I invaded the hell out of her personal space and because I still had a firm grip on Dai's arm he was forced to move with me. She glanced down at my hold on him then she focused back on me, eyes stern.

“In this moment I am not your friend. I am not your queen. I am your commander and until you can claim the same over me you will do as I say without question and I say you will do everything in your power to ensure the safety of our allies. Do we understand each other, Ruka?” I could see the indecision fight across her face. 

“Lord Kaname would kill me if I ever let anything happen to you.” She shook her head hard. “I will not, I'm sorry.” I struggled with my rage for a moment before answering her in a voice so cold it sounded foreign even to me. 

“This is not negotiable, Ruka. You will do as I say and if you don't...” I stepped into her until the fronts of our bodies brushed. Ruka's eyes widened and she took a small step back. “You won't have to worry about Kaname getting his hands on you because there won't be much left when I'm through with you. I will not tolerate insubordination. Do as I say, Ruka.” Her face was still set in stubborn lines but I could see her resolve cracking around the edges. 

The sweet flavor of gunpowder mingled with the bitter, coppery taste of blood, a lot of blood. Whatever was going on outside this room was getting closer and we had only moments. I glared at her as I spoke the next between gritted teeth. 

“I treasure you and Hanabusa more than I should, Ruka. Do not make me have to do something I will regret. I am your friend but I am your Lady and commander first.” She looked away into the crowd, an edge of panic creeping into her face. 

“But you are our queen.” I was taken aback by surprise for a moment before I shoved it away. To refer to your Lord or Lady as King or Queen was to profess great affection for them. In essence, it was a term of endearment in the vampire culture. I wasn't aware Ruka cared for me that much. I shoved all that down. One thing at a time. 

“Then listen to me, trust your Lady. Do as I say. Please.” She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, nodding as she did. When she opened her eyes a second later the fire of the old Ruka was back. 

“I will do as you say.”

“Good. I will get Mr. Moto to the back entrance. You focus on the other five. Be quick about it.” She could smell and hear what I did so I didn't need to explain the urgency to her. She dipped her head in silent agreement, keeping serious eye contact that seemed to say, don't you dare die. I smiled as she ran off through the crowd, slithering through the writhing bodies like water between rocks. I began making my way through the crowd again and was joined by the two guards that had seen us before. They flanked us and as we moved we began to draw a crowd. People were noticing finally that something wasn't right. Dai yanked on his arm in my grasp, getting my attention.

“What is the emergency, Yuki?” I pulled him next to me and spoke into his ear as we moved. 

“The air reeks of spilled blood and gunpowder and it's getting closer. Our people are putting up a fight but its only a matter of moments before whatever is going on outside spills inside.” His breathing and heart rate doubled and the acrid scent of fear wafted off him. 

“Who is it.” I shrugged. 

“Our enemies are plenty, Dai. I tried to tell you this earlier. It could be any number of them out there.” We were almost to the back entrance when I smelled it. I whirled and put my body in front of Dai's. We were moving fast enough and the stop was so abrupt that he collided against me and I had to reach out and steady him. 

“Why'd you stop.” Oh no. They weren't moving fast enough, no one was moving for the exits yet. We were out of time. I focused on the stage where the band was playing and the feeling of fire burned through my veins as I imagined the thick velvet backdrop hanging behind them lighting ablaze. The curtain burst into flame. 

“FIRE!” I screamed. “FIRE! EVERYBODY OUT! GET OUT! FIRE!” I yanked Dai behind me as I began running to the side of the room, not making much progress through the panicked crowd. I froze as I smelled it getting stronger I was choking on the sweetness of gunpowder and underneath of it was something else. I whirled and shoved Dai into the arms of his men. 

“Get him behind a pillar, NOW!” They didn't even question me they just did as I said. I yanked the dress up in giant handfuls as I ran towards the back exit. I wasn't going to get there in time. I yanked Artemis free of her holster. She helped me direct my magic and I was going to need it. As I'd relearned how to use my magic we'd all discovered that I was incredibly gifted in redirecting, absorbing and harnessing energy. The vampires called me a shield and right now I could be the difference between the life and death of a great many people. I screamed over the chaos, willing the air to carry my voice. 

“BOMB AT THE BACK EXIT! EVERYONE RUN TO THE FRONT! MOVE!” The chorus of screams that went up and the riptide of people as they rushed the opposite direction let me know that my message had delivered successfully. 

I heard a slight ping reverberate through the air and had enough time to extend Artemis into the monster scythe that she was before I felt the vibration of the explosion, smelled the burning of a thousand different things until I couldn't hardly breathe. I felt the heat before I saw the flames. I braced myself and brandished Artemis in front of me like I would bar the explosion from going any further. I let my magic implode through me and screamed as the roar of my magic and the intensity of the explosion collided. The flames crashed against the swirling, greenish wall of my shield. You could see the flame lick and ripple along it. The sensation of all that power roaring against mine was body numbing and I siphoned energy from the flames to maintain the barrier I was trying to keep between the students and it. Pain shot along my spine, the first sign that this was too much for me. I had never tried anything like this and for a second I thought I might not be able to do this. I screamed as another bolt of pain tore through me. I screamed for the pain, out of fear of failure. I screamed because I had to. Then something deep inside me clicked and suddenly my shield began swirling with the red of the flames until the green was gone and the heat from the flames rolled in front of me, a wall of heat and wind that blew my hair back from my face. My head rocked back on my spine as all the energy of the flame swirled into me in a vortex of power. The flames extinguished in a surge of power that blasted through the room and for a moment, I couldn't breathe. My heart stilled in my chest before racing triple time to catch up and breath rushed back into my lungs. Artemis was glowing in my hands, a mercurial swirl of the jade green of my magic and the red-orange of the flames I had just absorbed. I could see the people at the edges of the smoke preparing to rush in. I could smell the sweat, taste at least a dozen heart beats on my tongue. I glanced over to the square pillar on the side of the gym where Dai was staring at me with wide eyes. 

“GET HIM THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!” His guards snapped out of the daze they were in and suddenly they were lost in the crowd of people running for the front exit. I had to hope that my people had cleared the way for them. I had to believe that or we'd lost. I turned back to the threat ahead. The wall where the back exit had been was blown all to hell about thirty feet in either direction but the destruction stopped in a line where my shield had maintained it only about three feet from where the wall had been. It wasn't until The first man broke through the black of the smoke that I realized I could have just redirected the explosion back on them and saved myself a fight. Oh well. I was kind of spoiling for a good fight anyway. 

I saw the flash of the gun first and as I imagined a shimmering bubble around me it appeared, except this time instead of just stopping the bullet I deflected it back. As the man's bullets ricocheted off my shield I both felt and saw them turn on him with my magic still clinging to the lead. As he was impacted he screamed as his body erupted in flame. More screams echoed him and I hadn't realized how fascinated I'd been by what my magic was doing until five other men began screaming as they burned alive. The gunfire stopped as the other men with them holstered their guns, eyes wide with fear. To be honest the smell of burning flesh wasn't doing too much for me either. Their were seven men left, one more than I had thought, a careless miscalculation that might have cost someone their life. They all reached for their knives at the same time as they ran toward me. I smiled and then my heart stuttered in my chest as a familiar smell abruptly swam through my reality. Zero was bleeding, a lot. I would recognize that smell anywhere. I panicked. 

I needed to get to him, that was the only thing running through my mind. I didn't think, couldn't think past the fear clawing at the back of my throat, I just did. I didn't have time to play with these fools. I felt the fire of the explosion roar through me as I imagined the men charging me exploding in flames but I was too unfocused, too panicked and shoved too much power into them. I could hear their blood boiling in my ears a millisecond before they exploded simultaneously like over-filled water balloons. I stared in horror for a minute at what I had done, allowed myself to feel the magnitude of the grotesque nature of their death. They hadn't even had time to scream. The ground was redecorated in chunks and shards of bones, blood and much thicker things. Two of the men I'd set on fire weren't screaming but they were making a horrible, high-pitched keening noise. I closed my eyes cutting off the gory scene as I shoved more power into them. The flames roared and in seconds they were dead. 

I turned to see Ruka, Hanabusa and...Kaname? They stood thirty feet back from me, all staring as if they'd never seen me before. In that moment I didn't care. I whirled and ran as fast as I could towards the smell of Zero. The scent of his blood was too thick. He was badly wounded and I had to get to him. Images of Akatsuki flashed through my mind, the pain of his loss tore through my heart making me stumble. Not Zero. I couldn't lose him! I heard someone calling my name but I didn't stop. Blood poured out the side of his mouth, over my legs, soaking his hair beneath my fingers. I shook my head hard. Stop it! I screamed at myself again and again. 

Fingers wrapped around my upper arm attempting to yank me to a stop but I was moving too quick, had too much momentum. I turned on my heel and when my palm connected with the center of his chest, I knew it was a man but didn't know or care who it was in that moment, I blasted him back with a burst of energy then turned away and ran towards Zero. I could hardly breathe by the time I rounded the corner. 

Zero was down on one knee. Four men and a woman were dead on the ground around him. I came to a skidding stop in front of him and dropped to my knees. 

“How hurt are you?” He stared down at the ground. “Zero?” He still stared down, not reacting to me calling his name. I went to look at his wounds but he wouldn't move. 

“Zero!” His eyes snapped up to mine. “Let me see your wound.” His eyes widened, panic fluttering at the edges as he reached for my face with both of his hands, which were covered in blood. Whether it was his or someone else' I didn't know. Probably a combo of the two. 

“So much blood. Yuki-” I grabbed both his hands in mine and shook my head. 

“It's not mine. Now let me check your wound!” He stared at me for a moment before his hands dropped out of mine to rest limply at his sides. I shoved him back onto his butt and moved the jacket. I hissed as I saw the deep puncture wound low on his side. There was a shallow stab wound just to the left of his belly button and a deep slash across his upper chest that poured blood down the bare expanse of his chest and stomach, soaking into the once pure white of his hakama. 

“Smell so good.” His words were slurred and his head thumped back onto the ground as he fell flat on his back faster than I could catch him. He groaned as his eyes began to roll. He was going to pass out from blood loss. I straddled him and hauled his upper body against mine, one arm across the back of his shoulders while the other hand cupped the back of his head, forcing his face into my neck. On my knees the height difference was perfect for this. 

“Feed from me, Zero.” I felt him try to shake his head but I jerked him more firmly against me. 

“Feed, dammit! That isn't a request!” I think he might have chuckled but then he did as I asked. 

The sharp jolt of pain from the strike of his teeth was immediate, letting me know he'd bitten hard and deep. I held him close to me, listening to his throat convulse with every swallow. The first rush of endorphins came and I closed my eyes. His arms slowly wrapped around my waist, holding me tight to him as he drank as deeply and quickly as he could. It became increasingly difficult to simply stay on my knees. I had to focus everything I had on keeping us upright. Zero made some noise in the back of his throat and his whole body spasmed against mine a second before he broke away from me. He threw his head back to the sky and cried out, mouth ripe with the rich red of my blood, as his spine bowed. His hands spasmed on my hips and I had to catch myself with both hands on the ground before I fell on top of him as I felt and smelled his release. He cried out again and I stared down at his body beneath mine watching him convulse, tasting the thickly delicious scent of his orgasm on the back of my tongue and wished he was inside of me. After everything that had happened tonight that was the only thing I could think about in that moment. He cried out once more, spine bowing in a way that looked nearly painful before he fell bonelessly against the ground. I licked my lips and stared down at him for a moment, the wet warmth of desire for him pooling between my thighs. I wanted him and because of that reason I had to get off of him because it was only then that I remembered, Kaname was here. I stood up on shaky legs and stared down at him. His skin was slick with blood but there wasn't a single wound anywhere the eye could see. Amazing. He hadn't really fed that long and was completely healed. 

“It's magic.” I glanced up and saw Kaname propped against the wall, arms crossed as he watched me. 

“I know it's magic. There's no other way to explain it.” 

“No. That's not what I meant. The level of magic you've used tonight gives the blood a...” He glared down at Zero where he lay in a boneless, heaving heap, eyes fluttering and rolling senselessly. “heady kick.” He finished while still glaring at Zero. “Even I am tempted to...” He shook his head and looked off into the forest. 

I noticed, just above where his arms rested, a hand-shaped hole burned into his shirt in the center of his chest. I remembered the blast of magic I'd sent into the person who'd tried to keep me from getting to Zero. My eyes bugged out in my head to the point where I thought they might fall out the sockets. 

“Oh gods! Kaname, I'm so sorry!” I walked towards him, legs substantially steadier now. I ran my fingers over the pinkened and slightly blistered skin where my hand had blasted him. He had my full hand print on his chest. I shook my head and looked down at the ground. 

“I'm so sorry, Kaname! I- I didn't know. That's not an excuse but-” He silenced me with the softness of his lips against mine. It was a gentle kiss that was almost cautious, questioning. I kissed him back, wrapping my arms around his neck, turning the kiss into something deeper as he lifted me off the ground, pressing our bodies together in a solid line with an arm around my waist. He broke the kiss with a laugh and set me back on the ground. My body was wound tight with desire again, but it felt...different somehow. 

“You were in battle mode, Yuki. You acted on instinct. Don't ever apologize for that because that will keep you alive. Just the way I like you.” I chuckled but my heart wasn't in it. A pang of shame and guilt rang through me. I looked away to find Ruka and Busa both diligently waiting behind Kaname. I looked around and then back up at Kaname.

“Senri, Takuma and Rima?” He smiled down at me, understanding my question just fine. 

“They are doing damage control on the day class students and I have several other new employees doing the same to the piranhas snapping at our gates.” I nodded. He meant that the end of the night events were being wiped from their minds. 

“And the gym? How are we going to fix that? There is rubble, blood and other things all over the place in there.” 

“It is already being taken care of.” That was Kaname for ya. I made a mess, he cleaned it up. Like always. I sighed and nodded then frowned. 

“Seiren?” She was almost always at his side. He frowned and a look of near pain settled in his eyes. I looked up at the sky and blew out a deep breath. The last I had seen of Seiren she and Kaname were trying to convince Toga to work for us since we needed numbers now more than ever.

“What happened to her?” 

“I sent her and Toga on a reconnaissance mission in South Africa. The South African government gave a green light to anyone who was capable, citizens included, to kill vampires on sight. I was attempting to meet with them and offer them peace terms but sent Seiren and Toga ahead of us to scope out the safest route for our people to travel.” 

“Let me guess, they didn't come back.” I was still staring blankly at the stars. He was quiet for a moment and I almost said never-mind, I really didn't want to know. But I didn't because I had to know. 

“Seiren did.” His voice trembled with rage and I couldn't help but look at him. “In pieces.” I took several deep breaths and stared at the ground as my vision blurred. 

“And Toga?” 

“M.I.A.” I snapped my head up to see him glaring out into the trees. I wanted to ask what he thought had happened to Toga but I think we both knew. He was either dead or he'd gone mad after Seiren's death. After Toga rescued Seiren from the rubble of the battle with Rido they'd gone off together for a while. But when Kaname asked Seiren for her help the woman hadn't refused and, just as they'd left together, she and Toga came back together. Obviously convincing Toga to join us had been a success. A brief one but a success nonetheless. I shook my head and swiped a stray tear off my cheek before anyone cold notice. I turned to Ruka, giving Kaname my profile.

“Are Mr. Moto and his people safe?” She was quiet for a minute before she nodded.

“They are with Head Master Cross and a company of heavily armed guards.”

“Why is he still on campus?”

“I told Hanabusa and Ruka to take Mr. Moto and his companions there.” I took a step back so that I didn't have to crane my neck so far up to look Kaname in the face. 

“I told them to get him to safety.”

“So you did and he is as safe if not safer here on campus with us than off.” I stared at him for a moment. How dare he undermine what I'd said. 

“Ruka.” I addressed her without looking away from Kaname. 

“Yes.”

“You and Hanabusa get Zero back to his room and meet me in the Headmaster's...?” I let the statement to trail off because I had no idea where my father would have them. Kaname smirked slightly before he answered also without looking away from me. 

“Conference room.” I looked away from him towards Ruka who was glancing back and forth between the two of us.

“Don't look to him. I gave you a task to do.” She locked her eyes on me and nodded before making her way past me, Busa right behind her. 

“They are your guards, Yuki. They won't do much good halfway across the campus.” I smiled at him and it wasn't entirely pleasant. 

“I'm sure I won't come to harm with Rima, Takuma, Senri and of course, yourself at my side.” He frowned at me and I almost smiled. Why had I never noticed before how the skin around his eyes creased and his lips thinned when he frowned? He glanced over my shoulder and dipped his head before glancing back down at me. It was only then that I realized Ruka and Hanabusa had frozen, unsure of who to listen to. I didn't envy them their position right now. Logically, I could see their dilemma yet still their indecision irritated me. 

“Yes. Take the little vampire back to his room.” He made little sound like a dirty, slightly perverse word. “My wife and I have much to discuss.” 

“Yes. We do.” I heard them making their way away from us towards the dorm. Zero was protesting that he could walk unaided and a small smile peeked at the corner of my mouth. Kaname was watching my face intently as if he might find the secret of the universe written somewhere on it. When they had rounded the corner he finally spoke, though I knew, if they really wanted to, any of them could hear us. Sometimes the illusion of privacy was all one really needed. 

“What are you doing, Yuki?”

“What I came here to do.”

“No. You are not. I agreed to let you come here so that you could improve the relationship between vampires and humans at the academy.”

“And I am doing that.” 

“No. You are making a mess.” That pissed me off. 

“Sometimes you need to make a mess before you can clean something up. You taught me that.” Only the edge of anger was audible in my voice. He shook his head. 

“What you are doing is dangerous.”

“This whole fucking campaign is dangerous. What's your point?”

“Dammit, Yuki!” He nearly shouted it and a loud crack sounded as a fissure formed in the stone wall of the building ten feet away from us. I raised my eyebrow at him.

“Temper, temper, dear.” He glared at me and made some noise in the back of his throat before speaking.

“What the fuck are you doing, Yuki? You were not authorized to come here and try to weasel your way into the Japanese government's good graces.” I opened my mouth, a whole slew of insults and angry retorts ready to pour out. I clamped my jaw shut, sucked in a deep breath and turned, walking ten paces away from him. I held my breath and counted to ten, very, very slowly and still it wasn't enough. When I thought I was calm enough that I wouldn't scream at him I spoke. 

“We founded this coalition together. I am your wife and your partner, not your paparazzi pinup girl and certainly not the ornament hanging on your arm for an improved political image.” I whirled to face him sure the anger on my face was very clear. “I began to insert myself into Japanese politics, not to one up you, not to make a mess or to piss you off. I did it because without the support of Mr. Moto and his cabinet everything I'm trying to accomplish here would be like screaming into the wind. I don't need your 'authorization' to do what is necessary when necessary is exactly what this is.” I nearly spit the last at him. The look of astonishment on his face made the bitch-fest so very gratifying, until his face fell into something like pain. 

“This is truly how you feel?” I felt my anger crack around the edges at the pain on his face but I had started this so I was damn well going to finish it. I nodded and when I spoke my voice was devoid of anger.

“How else am I supposed to feel when you flaunt me around like a prized possession, move me around like a pawn without consulting me and worst of all, treat me like I'm not capable of taking care of myself, like a child? Can you tell me? Because if I'm not supposed to be pissed about that I honestly don't know what I'm supposed to feel.” Silence stretched between us for so long I felt like clapping, shouting, blowing raspberries, doing anything that would make noise.

“I see now that I have wronged you.” He looked up at me finally but wouldn't meet my eyes. “You have to know that I did not do this to hurt you. I fear for your safety. We have lost so much already. I could not bear to lose you.” I shook my head.

“And I for you but do not pretend like everything we have done is for my safety.” He smiled slightly at that.

“No. I suppose not. But just as what you've done with Mr. Moto is necessary so is the acting and playing dress-up and all the lights and cameras. It is a small sacrifice to make. We all have things we must sacrifice.” I scoffed at him.

“Don't you think I know that, dammit!” I nearly screamed it. “No. It is not a small sacrifice. Living under constant scrutiny, having to watch every word and action, laughing at bad jokes, making polite, meaningless conversation, having to memorize hundreds of names and faces and backgrounds simply to be able to carry on small-talk. Individually these things are tolerable. Together, all at once, it is a hailstorm of bullshit that grates at ones sense of self. It is not easy, nor is it a small sacrifice.” I took a deep, supposedly calming breath. “We are not only sacrificing ourselves but our friends, family and allies and their friends and families hearts along with them.”

“I never said it was going to be easy.” I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at that. 

“Easy? No. This is anything but easy.” I looked away from him towards the heavens. 

“You hate this.” It wasn't a question so I didn't respond. “I am sorry that you are having a crisis of doubt but we must carry on. We must honor our cause above ourselves.” I closed my eyes and just breathed. I wanted to scream and throttle him. I wanted to run away, to trade places with someone, anyone else. A great well of exhaustion overflowed inside me as I spoke.

“I guess someone has to try. Why not us, right? We've only got eternity.” Eternity. The word made me cringe. I could not, would not survive an eternity of this life. “I guess it helps that we can take one hell of a beating and keep on ticking, eh?” His arms wound around me and I remained stiff in his hold. He tensed at my lack of reaction but didn't pull away. We stayed like that for so long that I began to feel silly not returning his hug. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his chest pulling the smell of him deep into my lungs. He still smelled sweet, almost too sweet, like some candy I couldn't quite put my finger on. It startled me to realize that though I enjoyed the smell, it no longer comforted me the way it once had. It was still a comforting smell, but something was just missing, gone. Or maybe I was just out of it. Shock?

“How ever did you get Mr. Moto to join our cause anyway?” I laughed and shoved at him, pushing him back from me a foot or so. 

“Why? Because your deviously charming ways didn't win him over you thought he was a lost cause?” He shrugged and looked down at the ground, rolling just his eyes up to look at me through a curtain of thick lashes. Beautiful, coy and dangerous. Oh yes. Very dangerous. I'd seen that look seduce quite a few politicians in the past four years. Having it directed at me made my heart beat a little faster. 

“I have my ways.”

“How?” I rolled my eyes and pretended to be outraged.

“Why is it that as much as you men pine after us you still underestimate the allure of our pussy powers?” Kaname's eyes flared wide, jaw dropping open. The disbelief on his face did me in. I couldn't stop laughing. My stomach actually cramped I was laughing so hard. I laughed until I was crying and out of breath. I laughed until it hurt and even then I couldn't seem to stop. I finally fell silent and Kaname still looked at me as if he'd never seen me, for the second time that night. 

“What? Does my language offend you?” I giggled a little after that and had to shove my hand against my mouth to stifle the laugh trying to come forward again. He shook his head and cleared his throat. 

“You didn't?”

“Didn't what? Fuck him?” Just when I thought his eyes couldn't get any wider he proved me wrong. I giggled again, pressing my hands into my stomach. It really did hurt to laugh. 

“Yes.” I giggled once more and shook my head.

“No. I just happened to have much better timing than you.”

“Then why imply you had?” He never really had been one for humor. I grinned at him.

“You're just so much fun to play with.” He was suddenly in front of me and then I was in his arms being held a foot and change off the ground while he kissed me deeply. He quickly reminded me that there were much more fun things to play with. He broke the kiss first and stared into my eyes from inches away. I shivered at the dark gleam of promise in those eyes so like my own. My body remembered him. Oh yes, it remembered him well. He smiled a wide, devious twist of lips that caught my breath in my throat.

“Come, my queen. We have places to go and people to attend to.” I nodded, offering him my version of the same smile he showed me. 

“And miles to go before we sleep.” My body slid along the length of his as he slowly lowered me until my feet were flat on the ground, a sort of strip-tease since I already knew how the body that slid under mine looked without clothes on. 

“Miles.” It amazed me how much sex he could put into one word. I shivered at the promise gleaming in his eyes and he turned from me, walking towards the front of the building, trailing a richly masculine laugh that said more than any number of words that he knew exactly what he did to me. He wouldn't be laughing if he only knew. 

….......Two hours later we're still in the conference room.............

I sat back in one of the two dozen chairs surrounding the massive rich oak table that was the centerpiece of the conference room, pinching the bridge of my nose between thumb and forefinger. A wave of exhaustion swept over me and for a moment I squeezed my eyes shut and pretended I was anywhere but here, sighing deeply. 

“I'm sorry, are we boring you, Lady Yuki?” I smiled slightly and answered him without opening my eyes. 

“Yes, actually you are, Mr. Shiki.” 

“This is why women don't do well in politics! They have no head for it. I beg you. Please, Prime Minister. Reconsider this partnership.” 

“Lady Kuran?” I took several deep breaths, counting to twenty before exhaling. “Yuki?” I flicked my eyes open to find Mr. Moto standing before me, concern deepening the wrinkles around his eyes. 

“Yes, Dai?” He smiled slightly before getting very serious. 

“You must be more attentive to these pressing matters.”

“Oh, I am being attentive.” I looked over all the people in the room, one at a time before continuing. “In fact, I can count the number of things that have been discussed in the last hour and a half that was not a reiteration of some form of the first half hour on one hand and still have fingers left over.” 

“She mocks us!” I whipped my head to the right to glare at Shiki who's sexist remarks were really starting to piss me off.

“I have spent the last hour and a half listening to you fools rant and rave over how following a woman for less than twenty-four hours has led you into the biggest PR disaster since the recent scandal blew up the media. We have explained to you that the only people that know of what has happened tonight are those of us in this room. You-”

“You have led us into the arms of disaster!”

“You are trying my patience, Mr. Shiki, of which I can promise you I have very little left. You allow your hatred of women to cloud your judgment. If you would but take a moment to think above such petty grievances-”

“I will not speak to you any longer, oni bitch!” I closed my eyes for a second before glaring at him.

“Mr. Shiki-”

“Silence, devil whore! I will only speak to those with competence!” Takuma who had been so lazily, disinterestedly sprawled across the cherry stained oak table-top was suddenly vibrating with rage. The wall five feet behind Shiki cracked, sounding like thunder in the enclosed room. Everyone in the room, including Kaname, was yelling. 

“Enough!” I yelled it but was drowned out by the shouting match that was on the verge of turning into a slug-fest. I stood up, allowing my rage to build a nice warm fire in the pit of my core. 

“I said enough!” A frigid wind tore through the room, coating everything it touched with ice crystals, the arctic breeze whipping my hair around me, carrying my voice like a clap of thunder. The humans cowered back, cuddling into their own bodies for warmth, everyone except Dai who simply turned to stare at me. I realized the wind was swirling outward from me and that killing my allies would probably look pretty bad. I cut off the wintry blast so abruptly that everyone fell to their knees, even I had to steady myself with a hand on the solid oak separating me from them. Kaname, of course, was excluded but only because he maintained a death grip on the edge of the table. I was breathing hard, skin burning with the flames of my rage heating it from within. 

“I am through wasting my time here. You will listen or you will leave. My people have sacrificed much to get to where we are, they have given everything!” I gestured at them all standing so close together from the near altercation on the opposite side of the table. “All I see is a bunch of imbeciles bickering over semantics, inventing problems where there are none instead of trying to think like rational, competent individuals to find the solution to the one about to bring war to all of our doorsteps!” Rage like none other I had ever felt before burned like how I imagined the fires of hell would, tinting my world red. 

“What the fuck have they sacrificed for! What have they died for? This?!” I was all out screaming at them and had to reign myself in. I was breathing like I carried twice my weight on my shoulders with the effort to regain my composure as I leaned into the table. “Fuck. That.” The words were so calmly spoken as my anger pumped ice through my veins and fire into my heart, a combination that was unsettling and yet oddly soothing. I stood calmly, straightening my spine like it might break if it bent. 

It was in the perfect, dumb-struck silence of that moment that I finally saw my hair floating in curled wisps on a soft wind that touched only me. My dress fluttered gently in that breeze and I was willing to bet that my eyes would be glowing vampire garnet red. I took a deep breath to calm myself a little before speaking, it didn't work. 

“As the old adage goes, 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend'. My enemy is the war between vampire and human that is looming over us like a long feared prophecy. If it comes to pass it could decimate a large portion of life as we know it. As of this moment anyone who finds themselves the friend of my enemy is in my way. If you are in my way, I will remove you by any means necessary. The enemies of our cause will be removed either by my hand or any hand loyal to me. This is my decree and my first law as Lady of the vampires to be obeyed until, or if, I ever deem fit to lift it.” I paused and swallowed hard before continuing. “This includes but is not exclusive to humans.” I took a moment to meet the eyes of every vampire in the room, all of which were on the other side of the table with the men of Dai's cabinet and the prime minister himself. Ruka and Hanabusa, as much as it pained me, were no exception. I looked directly at Dai as I spoke the next.

“I am going to ask that you capitalize on your position as Prime Minister and the powers granted you therein to dismiss Mr. Shiki from his duties. He has proven that he holds his own bigotry closer than reason. We cannot afford such an oversight.” Shiki made a noise of outrage.

“I am his Minister of Defense!” I spoke without looking at him. 

“Which only provides more grounds for your dismissal. That is far too important a position to be occupied by a moron.” Dai was quiet as he analyzed me, face wrought with contemplation. Shiki however was loud and irritating as ever.

“I won't stand for this you devil-” My anger spoke for me, cutting the hateful little man's words short.

“You have gravely insulted me once, Mr. Shiki. Do it again and I will take a personal interest in matters of your removal.” I flicked only my eyes over to him as the last word left my lips and I wanted him to finish his insult. I wanted him to give me a reason. Dai spoke finally not looking away from me. 

“Goro.” Shiki looked to his Prime Minister. 

“Sir?”

“Shut the fuck up before you get yourself killed.” I smiled rather unpleasantly at Dai.

“Now, now. I never said anything about killing anyone.” He gave me a look that said, liar. He was right. I was lying because I had meant every word. I'd tried nice but nice wasn't working. Maybe they'd understand practical ruthlessness better. 

“What will you do if I choose not to remove him?” He seemed to be waiting for a confession of my intent to murder the man. I'd actually probably really enjoy killing the fucker. But I spoke rationally. 

“I will trust that you have sound reasoning for your decision and will respect it. I only ask that he not be present for any of our dealings.” Dai frowned.

“Just like that?” My smile widened. 

“Until you give me reason to doubt your capacity to rationalize and reason I will trust your judgment.”

“And if you begin to doubt me?” Again my smile widened, it was getting to the point that my face was starting to hurt a little and yet I couldn't seem to stop smiling. 

“I feel that we both have a vested interest in assuring that this partnership works.”

“But if you begin to doubt me? What then?” 

“Let us hope it does not come to that, Mr. Moto.” He frowned. 

“What happened to Dai?” I actually laughed at that. 

“My answer still stands, Dai.” I put a little emphasis on his name. He nodded, more a dip of the head really. 

“As Prime Minister of Japan, I call upon the rights granted to me by such title and release you, Goro Shiki from the title and all duties and responsibilities warded to you as Minister of Defense. You have been found unfit for the honor due to lack of rational judgment.” Shiki's face fell into lines of disbelief. 

“Mr. Moto-” Dai cut him off, turning to face the man as he continued. 

“Witnessed before all in this room I denounce you from this day froward as a member of the National diet and cabinet of political office. You will-”

“Dai-” Shiki's voice cracked in horror as the reality of the situation finally sank in. Dai continued, voice more firm with resolve and an edge of anger at continually being interrupted. 

“You will be escorted back to the National Diet building to clear out your office and claim any belongings that are yours. When you are finished you will be escorted from the building for the final time never again to enter it's premises with any level of political authority. This is my official decree, so shall it be known.” 

“It is known.” Every vampire in the room said in quietly forceful tones that combined turned those three words into a dull roar. Dai looked curiously at them in turn, not expecting the formality. It was common practice for vampires to echo the final decree of such formal declarations. I don't know why. They just did. 

I looked up at the soft cry I heard, quickly looking away at the silent tears and quiet anguish on Shiki's face. I might have demanded it be done, and I had good reason but despite the man's rudeness, I did not enjoy the pain he was feeling. I'd never liked inflicting pain on others, an unfortunate personality quirk that at times like these overcomplicated my life and I was about to rub salt in his freshly dealt wound. 

“Mr. Shiki, it should go without saying that any and all matters you have been privy to both in discussion and in practice shall henceforth never be leaked in any form to anyone else. If you should be discovered relaying such things you will be convicted of treason and punished within the limits of such a crime.” I left off the part where I threatened to silence him personally, but I was pretty sure that part was understood. “Dai?” He turned only halfway to me, offering me his profile. “I would like to send one of my vampires with your men to escort Mr. Shiki to the National Diet building then home from there, wherever home is.” He seriously thought about my offer then nodded.

“Agreed.” I put one of the newer guards that I was completely new to on the task, serious about my offer whilst not offering up anything I valued. It would be a loss of course, every life is valuable, but I could live with the death of a stranger. I couldn't live with the death of another friend. Not so soon. When Mr. Shiki and his escort left Dai sat down across from me and simply stared. I sat as well and a few moments later everyone else sat too. After several minutes of silence Dai finally spoke.

“You are proving to be quite the fearfully formidable ally, Yuki.” I grinned.

“Better a fearful ally than a monstrous enemy.” Dai smiled slightly and dipped his head in agreement. 

“You would indeed make a monstrous enemy and even though I never thought I would work with so...odd an ally I am most grateful I decided what I did.” I laughed and the tension in the room flowed away on the tails of such a genuinely cheerful sound. Dai had a knack for amusing me. I liked that in an ally and especially in a friend. Maybe we could be friends. Though in the long run, it might be healthier to simply leave it at allies. 

“War makes for strange bedfellows.” We all laughed. Dai came around the table as we all stood and took my hand in his. 

“Queen Yuki.” He placed a gentle, chaste kiss on my knuckles, eyes rolled up to my face as he did so. I smiled and playfully rolled my eyes, gently taking my hand from him. He stood and, still smiling, dipped his head towards Kaname. 

“Lord Kuran.” Kaname's face was pleasantly, professionally blank as he dipped his head back. 

“Prime Minister Moto.” Without another word we all made to leave the conference room. I don't know why but I glanced over my shoulder and smiled as the deep shadows of the far corner of the room that had been moving, stilled. I laughed to myself as Kaname, who had opted to be the last out, closed the door. 

I hope you enjoyed the show, Zero. 

….............................

Dai had sincerely apologized as we all walked out of the building together for not recognizing the danger of his decision to come to the academy tonight after the announcement earlier. He was lucky that most of our assailants tonight had been human. There were a few vampires, but for the most part it was a human assault. Many fathers, sons, husbands, wives, daughters, mothers, aunts, uncles and friends wouldn't be coming home to the ones who loved them. Not ever. No matter how much they spent on spots in the newspaper or how many pictures and pleas they put on social media they, unlike most people, would never know the comfort of closure, if there is to be any comfort in burying/burning the ones you love. Their corpses would disappear along with all knowledge of tonight's performance, except to those privy. And for what? Jealousy, blind hatred, religion. Are those things really worth dying for? 

As Kaname and I walked back to the once abandoned dorm I couldn't seem to reel my mind away from such thoughts. Why might you ask were we walking to the dorm originally intended for the night class, the Star Dorm I believe they called it? Oh, because they suddenly finished construction today. I was informed by my father that my room was ready for me now, fully refurnished. What a coincidence. Kaname pops up and voila! My new room. 

“Yuki?” I stopped just in time to avoid colliding with Kaname who had stepped in front of me.

“What!” I snapped, my anger flaring up. “Why do you have to be so dramatic? You could have just asked me to stop!” I was breathing hard, pissed for no reason at all. The worry on Kaname's face helped me cool down a bit, but it wasn't enough, I was still angry. 

“I've been talking to you for the past three minutes. I called your name multiple times. Are you okay?” I stared blankly at him for a few breaths before slowly walking around him.

“Yuki, I asked if you were okay.” He sounded slightly petulant. I guess he wasn't used to people ignoring him. I wonder how long it would take to piss him off simply by doing just that? The thought made me smile. 

“I heard you, Kaname. Clearly the answer is no. Did you ask me such a stupid question just to receive audible confirmation? Or did you actually have a reason for it?” I felt his fingers wrap around my upper arm a second before he spun me to face him. His face was set in hard, frustrated, nearly angry lines, lips thinned out with the strength of his emotions.

“What is the matter with you?” His words were a low hiss. I ignored his question and stared calmly into his eyes as I spoke. 

“Let me go.” The flat, emotionless tone of my voice struck a chord with him, his eyes widening slightly before his fingers loosened one at a time. I turned from him and pulled my arm from his grasp before his fingers could completely loosen. I continued making my way towards the dorm feeling Kaname's eyes on me but not hearing his footsteps. I stopped about three hundred feet from him and waited. I closed my eyes, sucking in giant lungfuls of air, holding each breath as long as I could before exhaling. I was mostly calm by the time Kaname's steps were close enough that I could feel the small vibrations of them in my soles. He stopped a little away from me but didn't say anything. The silence grew thick and finally he spoke, realizing I wouldn't.

“There never used to be so many secrets between us.” He wrapped his arms around me from behind in a gentle almost-hug. “Talk to me, Yuki, please.” I sighed quietly and forced myself to relax into his arms one muscle at a time. When I was noticeably relaxed he closed the small space between our bodies, holding me as close as he could. I raised a single hand up to rest on his forearm across my chest but that was the only reassurance I gave him that I appreciated the touch. If he noticed it didn't show. 

“What's wrong?” His words were calm, gentle and coaxing and made me smile slightly while also inexplicably adding a spark to the dull ember of my rage. 

“This whole day just pisses me off.”

“Really? The whole day? There wasn't a single part that made you smile?” I remembered the interlude in my room earlier with Ruka and Zero. I could nearly hear Zero's laugh, feel the smile stretching my face as I once again felt the warmth hearing that wonderful contralto echo through my memories. I was smiling. 

“There were a few.” Even I could hear the smile in my voice. 

“Yeah? Just a few?” I knew he wanted me to admit that seeing him had made me smile but honestly the only thing I could think of when I thought of the moment I realized he was here was the moment I'd thought I was losing Zero. I remembered the kiss we'd shared, the feeling of my body pressed so eagerly against his and the way my body responded the way it always did. Then I remembered the feeling of Zero's hands gripping my hips and the way my stomach and chest fluttered, thighs moistening with both my arousal and his release as his body bowed backwards. And the sounds he'd made. I shivered in Kaname's arms and shoved the memory away before I got sucked back into the moment. 

“There are only ever a few.” My voice was slightly husky with the edge of sex. Kaname chuckled a slow, sexy roll of sound. I'd never met anyone who could make a chuckle sound so sexy. I shivered for him this time, knowing exactly what thoughts accompanied that laugh. 

“Come with me, my lovely wife so that I might enjoy getting you out of this dress.” He leaned down and whispered the next in my ear. “As amazing as you look in it, you'd look even better out of it.” I shivered once again and he laughed as he picked me up in his arms. Then we were moving towards the dorm at speeds I couldn't fathom quantifying.

I wasn't sure if our guards even tried to keep up or if they'd purposely allowed us to abandon them, knowing what we were intending. I bet they'd heard at least part of our conversation and had opted out of being privy to the sexcapades about to ensue. 

I was on the bed before I could register the rest of my surroundings. I'd seen very little of the dorm, but I was about to know at least the bed rather intimately. He rolled me onto my stomach tracing his fingers delicately across my skin, teasing caresses, as he unlaced the back of my gown. My body was more than ready to accommodate his by the time he was half-way down my back. I squirmed under his affections and made small noises of protest. I wanted the damned thing off and him inside me. I had no patience tonight. I felt the final cinch of the lacing release, the dress loosening so that it slid easily to the sides under his fingers. I couldn't take it anymore. I rolled onto my back so quick that I actually got to see the startled look on his face from so unexpectedly quick a movement. 

“Take it off. No more games.” He raised an eyebrow before leaning over me, doing exactly what I'd said. He jerked the dress over my hips and the soft silk of the liner slipped along my leg, a last kiss of cloth before my body was splayed nearly naked before him. The only thing I wore was the small, black lace underwear, garters and hose and the heels he had forgotten to remove. He licked his lips as his eyes roved over me. He wrapped his fingers around my ankles, pulling me across the bed until my thighs were on either side of his hips. He smiled as he bent so that he could pull my nipple into his mouth. My breath hitched as a spike of pleasure shot through me from his mouth feeding at my breast to groin. His fingers rolled my other nipple as he began kissing his way down my stomach. I felt the tips of his fangs brush across my hip, and looked down at him. His eyes glowed a brilliant ruby, tongue bright pink as he ran it across my hip in a quick flick. I threw my head back and moaned as my spine bowed in anticipation. Seconds later his fangs bit in deep, just above my right hip. I gasped, eyes going wide before moaning as he rolled both nipples between his fingers while his mouth sucked at me, a bit of pain to go with my pleasure. My body throbbed for him, aching where I needed him most. All the sexual tension with Zero had done a number on me and I needed this. 

Zero. I saw him again. Head thrown back, mouth scarlet with my blood as he cried out. I echoed that phantom cry and a snapping noise crawled it's way up the wall, sounding like a small explosion. Kaname pulled back so that he was hovering over me on all fours but it wasn't me he was staring at. He stared at the massive crack in the wall to the far right of the room. I reached for him, fingers deftly working on the buttons to his crisp white button down. He'd been wearing a black and white formal tux. I wasn't sure where the jacket had gone but I was eager to get him out of the rest of his clothes. He turned his head back to me, an odd expression on that strikingly handsome face. 

“Your powers are growing.” I nodded, reaching for the last button. His fingers wrapped around mine, trying to still me. “You are growing frightful in your capacity for magic.” I nodded again, moving into him for a kiss. He kissed me back but seemed to be lost to thought. I abandoned his lips and kissed along his jaw, down his neck.

“I thought you might have just had a temporary power boost for the display you put on earlier.” I made a noise of frustration against his neck. 

“Yes, yes. That's all very fascinating.” I laced my fingers into his hair using my grip in his long dark waves as an anchor to pull myself closer to him, which just meant I was more solidly under him. 

“How long have you known about your growing abilities?” I fought not to tighten my hand in his hair until it was painful, though I knew he didn't mind hair pulling. “How long, Yuki?” I made another noise of frustration and fell back onto my elbows, allowing my head to fall back on my neck while I struggled to breathe past my hormones. 

“Kaname, please. You want to talk about this now?” My words were breathless both with desire and disbelief. 

“How long?” His words were simple and stern. I shrugged, easing up so that my lips brushed his neck as I spoke. 

“I don't know. A while, I guess.” I kissed my way back up his neck, lifting one hand up to trail down the smooth, muscled length of his chest and stomach. I was nearly to the buckle of his belt when his hand closed nearly painfully around mine. I gasped but the pain was a booster to my high, not a downer. I'd found out I liked a little more pain with my sex, more than Kaname was comfortable dealing out. Apparently that was not the reaction he wanted right now. His other hand was suddenly in the middle of my chest, pinning me to the bed under his weight. I closed my eyes and fought the little surge of both adrenaline and desire. 

“Why didn't you tell me?” I pushed against him but he pushed right back showing I was going nowhere unless I was willing to hurt him. I growled in frustration and forced myself to go limp beneath him or strike out in outrage. “Why?” He sounded kinda angry. I was so not in the mood for this. I looked up at him and put sex, heat, passion, danger, everything I wanted in that moment, into my eyes. 

“Fuck me, Kaname. Fuck me! Just, please, shut up and fuck me! I don't want to talk! I want to rip your clothes off and fuck you like an animal.” The last was said with a growl of something close to warning. His eyes widened a second before he shook his head and looked back to the crack in the wall

“This is important, Yuki.” I shouted in frustration. That was it. I pushed against his hold on me and when he wouldn't move I did something I'd never done before. I let my magic pour through me like a dam breaking. It crashed into me hard enough to jerk my body forward so that his hand on my chest hurt. 

“Yuki-” He stared down at me with incredibly wide eyes a second before I thrust all the energy of my pent up sexual frustration into him. He gasped loudly and I sighed in relief. He closed his eyes and seemed to be fighting all that energy, all that sex, my sex. I watched him swallow convulsively, body vibrating with the most primal urge we know. I rolled out from under him, sweeping one of his arms out in the process. He fell face first onto the bed as I rolled to my feet. He moved onto his side and hissed, seeing me standing nearly naked beside the bed before slamming his eyes shut. I watched his body slowly curl into a ball

“Yu-...ki-...” He gasped my name out and as angry as I was I suddenly felt horrible for what I'd done. I very carefully got up on the edge of the bed so that the combo of hose on silk didn't send me crashing to the floor and began moving towards him. His eyes flared wide as he watched me come for him. I reached out to touch him but he fell to the floor in his attempt to move away from me. I cursed under my breath. 

“I can't help if you keep running from me.” Then again I wouldn't have to help him if I'd never done this in the first damn place. I mentally kicked myself as I landed in a crouch next to him. He cried out, spine bowing as I placed a hand on his stomach. I opened myself to the familiar essence of my sex and desire. At first it trickled back, not nearly fast enough for me so I called for it, but apparently I wasn't taking it back fast enough because one second I was sipping through a straw and the next I was trying to swallow it down before I drowned in it as Kaname shoved it at me. I felt the last of it leave Kaname, my own desire and sex settling in a hollow deep inside me with a click that I was betting he couldn't hear. However, I got more than I'd bargained for. I squirmed on my side where I must have fallen with the swirling pressure of Kaname's desire as well. I swallowed hard. I guess I deserved this. I pushed off the floor and wobbled back to my feet. Kaname glared up at me, panting where he'd fallen. I forced myself to close my eyes and calm my body as I rolled the flavor of his desire around in my head. It was a zesty flavor, something like citrus mixed with something a little earthier. I was steady on my feet when Kaname fumbled to an upright position long enough to fall onto the bed. 

“What-” His voice was rough like his throat was too dry for speech. He swallowed several times before he spoke again. “What the fuck!” Not a question, just a pissed off exclamation. I actually saw the anger swirling through the red of his eyes as he glared at me, still lightly panting. I shrugged.

“You wanted to talk about my growing powers.” 

“So you, what, thought you'd just save some time by showing me!” I shrugged and looked down at the ground. 

“It's been a really long day and I was so angry that you wanted to talk instead of have sex. I didn't really think. I just acted.” 

“So because I didn't fuck you on demand when I was worried about you, you decided to drug me with your desire. What were you hoping, Yuki? That I'd lose my mind and ravage you?” I shivered a little at the thought he proposed but was steadily getting angrier. He noticed my reaction and his eyes narrowed a little.

“I already told you I wasn't really thinking at all. That you would jump to the worst possible conclusion hurts me.” He was quiet for a moment before spitting out a harsh laugh.

“Hurt you? That shit fucking hurt!” I tried to feel bad again but suddenly I didn't regret what I'd done so much. “You like pain like that?” He made pain sound like a dirty word. I looked down at the ground again. 

“Yes. I like a little pain with my sex but that wasn't why it hurt you.”

“A little? No, Yuki. I like a little pain. You are just a fucking sado-masochist.” I turned away from him as tears burned up the back of my throat. I had never heard Kaname speak to anyone this way and nothing even close to this had ever been directed at me. I swiped away the tears as I moved over to where my dress had slid to the floor. I had to do something. Anything except stand there and see that look in his eyes. I moved over to the closet and began slipping the dress onto a hangar while I spoke. 

“It hurt so much because of how much energy I shoved into you, not because that is the level of pain I like.” He scoffed as I continued. “Sex is just another form of energy.” The most delicious kind. “You know how skilled I am at manipulating energy. It is my favored form of magic.” 

“And?” I turned to glare at him. 

“So what you felt was a shit ton of energy being shoved into you with nowhere to go.”

“If it was just energy then why did I want to ravage you until you screamed for me to stop?” I swallowed hard and looked at the ground, knowing he wouldn't miss my reaction. 

“My god. That turns you on doesn't it?” I didn't answer. 

“Energy is infinite. It can change form but it never extinguishes. It never...dies.” That word would have to do since my vocabulary seemed to be abandoning me. “It can only change form. I shoved all my sexual energy into you and wasn't thinking enough to change the essence of it nor, do I think, I wanted to. I wanted you to know how badly I needed you.” He made a rude noise in the back of his throat. 

“Are you trying to tell me that you were so horny that it was painful and that's why it hurt me?” His voice was so incredulous that all I could do was nod. It was embarrassing enough without having to say it aloud. For a moment I saw a look of pity cross his face before his rage flared back up. 

“You are inventing things to excuse your actions.” I thought I might implode, like I'd made those men do earlier, as my blood boiled from the heat of my fury. One of the curtains exploded in flame, quickly spreading to the other one. He whipped his head towards the flame before looking back at me. I took a deep breath and extinguished the flame but it was too late to save the curtain as it fell from the rod in a wall of ash. I took one step forward and stopped myself.

“With you being unable to so much as stand yet I figured I needn't show you again how painful the truth of my situation is. Perhaps I was wrong.” My voice was both pained and colder than I'd ever been towards Kaname. His eyes widened. 

“You wouldn't.” I laughed and shook my head, turning from him to root through my suitcase, once again packed for the move into the Star dorm. 

“No. You're right. I wouldn't. I don't enjoy inflicting pain on others.”

“Are you trying to lie to me or yourself?” I whirled with a handful of clothes.

”What I prefer in the bedroom and how I behave in every circumstance and situation other than that are two separate preferences entirely!”

“Is it, Yuki?” He was incredibly calm, calculative, which was not helping calm me. I threw my clothes onto the ground at my feet and stalked a few steps forward in anger before I steeled myself against the urge to do something I'd regret later. 

“Fighting your inner sadist?” I ground my teeth and the tears burned up the back of my throat again. I shook my head. No! I would not cry! 

“Why is it so hard for you to accept that this is just a part of me, a part of my desires?” My voice trembled with the effort to simply stay standing where I was. I kept my eyes squeezed shut tight.

“Why do you want it? How can you enjoy pain so much?” That took me aback. He made it sound as if I wanted him to gut me as he fucked me. 

“I'm not asking for much, Kaname but I'm not made of porcelain. When I say fuck me I want you to fuck me. You don't always have to be so careful.” I just wanted, well...I wanted everything the term fuck entailed. 

“I don't want to “fuck” you! I want to make love to you, to treasure you! Why do you want me to hurt you, Yuki?” For a moment the room was quiet enough that I could hear him breathing heavily from the shouting he'd done only moments before. I stared anywhere but at him, swallowing back my tears again. “WHY!” I jumped and screamed right back at him. 

“I DON'T FUCKING KNOW! OKAY? I JUST DO!” He stared at me and I watched his eyes grow dark with something I didn't much like. I turned from him, crouching to pick my clothes up off the floor and suddenly I was slammed flat against the ground. Kaname's weight pinned me to the floor as he laid the full length of his body on top mine while he shoved my legs apart with his knees. My heart was racing in my throat. He sank his fangs into my shoulder as he grabbed my underwear in his fist and yanked. I couldn't hear the fabric tearing over my moan but I felt it part from my body in one hard jerk that made it hard to breathe. Endorphins rushed through me and my body began to roll against his all on it's own. He grabbed a handful of my hair and yanked my head back hard as he released my shoulder, growling in my ear. 

“Is this what you like?” I couldn't speak. He wrapped his fingers around my throat, using his hold on it to lift me to my knees, keeping our bodies pressed together as he did it. He squeezed one of my breasts in his left hand and I gasped. Then his nails scraped down my stomach making me writhe against him. 

“This is what you like, isn't it?” His hand suddenly dipped between my legs at the same time as his fingers tightened on my throat to where it took some concentration to breathe. He moved over me in quick movements, bringing me closer and closer to that golden edge. I couldn't breathe, didn't care to remember such a tedious action. 

“Answer me.” He growled. “You like this, don't you?” The throaty growl in his voice almost did me in except his fingers that had been going so fast suddenly stopped, the hand around my throat easing up enough for me to take a gasping inhale. I only got one. His hands tightened and sped me close again before stopping, followed by a near screaming inhale and then it started all over again and again and again. He did it once more before I actually screamed in frustration. 

“Answer me!” He screamed as every quick swipe of his fingers spiked pleasure through me. 

“Y-yes...” I gasped out. 

“What? I didn't quite hear you.” I was nearly stupid with anticipation. I could feel that heavy weight of orgasm but he kept slowing and speeding his fingers, keeping me right on the brink. 

“YES!” I screamed around his hand squeezing my throat. Please, please, please! So close. His hand tightened on my throat to where breathing was impossible and that was it. I was cresting, falling into that orgasm and suddenly I was thrust into the floor a noise of disgust sounding from the man behind me. 

I was boneless, defenseless as the floor came up and hit me. I was breathless, body screaming in denial, head pounding where it had connected with the floor, every flutter of my heart sounding like a bass drum within the confines of my skull. I lay there, boneless, unable and unwilling to move as my body raged against me. My lungs rebelled at the lack of air, the pain in my head intensifying until it was almost too much but the more my head hurt the less my body rebelled against me. Which pain was worse? I decided I liked the head pain better. I felt hands on me, rolling me over but I didn't open my eyes or respond at all. I knew who belonged to those hands that pushed my hair back from my face and cradled me into a lap I was too familiar with. I ignored him and focused on the slowing beat of my heart. It was slow. So slow now. Why was it slowing like that? My brain screamed at me and the pain was too much. I was forgetting something wasn't I?

“Yuki!...” His voice was muffled, distant though that was weird since I could feel his lap just under me. Then I realized I couldn't. I couldn't feel much of anything anymore. My heartbeat had given way to something sluggish, lazy. “BREATHE!...” A man screamed it with everything he had but still it sounded far away, an echo of something much louder. Breathe? Oh yeah. I was supposed to do that right? 

The action seemed too much at first, the weight of a mountain on my lungs, but as soon as that first woosh of oxygen hit my lungs they burned for more. I took a screaming inhale, spine bowing as that first rush of air burned my lungs like I had inhaled lava. My heart began to race to make up for all those lost beats. I laid in his arms as I relearned how to breathe. Why had I stopped in the first place? I couldn't remember. I blinked up to see Kaname hovering above me, tears running freely down his face as he cradled me closer. I let him hold me only because I couldn't move yet. I remembered now. I remembered my head hitting the floor and choosing that as the lesser pain. 

I tried to sit up and, to my shock, found it was easier to move than I thought, except the throbbing in my head. Every muscle felt like it was wired to the spot that had connected with the floor so that the smallest movement felt like I was jabbing my new boo-boo from the inside out. I winced as I tried to stand. I felt his hand on my hip and jerked forward, nearly falling again. He was saying something and I think he was trying to help me to my feet but I slapped at his hands until he left me alone. I finally got to my feet, pain roaring in my head, the world wobbling enough that I almost lost my balance. I opened my eyes only when the world stopped swimming. It occurred to me that I might have a concussion, a pretty bad one. It most definitely hadn't helped that I'd gone so long without breathing. I should be healed nearly completely from such a mundane wound in about an hour from now, but for the moment the nausea was my primary threat. 

I slowly moved over to where I remembered throwing the clothes I'd plucked out of my suitcase at random. I looked in confusion at the floor when I didn't find them there. Kaname held them out to me and I snatched them without looking at him, turning away and making my way back to the bed. I leaned against the solid oak post of the bed frame as I fumbled into a small pair of cut-off shorts that I loved to wear when the cameras couldn't see. Kaname had at one point shown quite a liking for them as well. I was still wearing my garter belt and the hose, having taken to wearing the garter under the underwear to make life easier, but the actual underwear were toast and I didn't care enough to dig for more. I pulled on a summery, light, plaid, orange, red and yellow button down. It was thin enough that in the right light you would probably be able to see my nipples but I really didn't care. When I was as dressed as I was going to get I propped myself against the post, leaning my head back against it as I stared at Kaname, his face as blank as I'd ever seen it. The tear tracks still stained his face, eyes still watery. Again, I didn't care. It didn't stop me from saying what I had to say. 

“I do not need you here to guide me through political negotiations. From what I saw earlier I honestly think in this particular situation, I'd fare better by myself.” 

“Yuki, I'm so-” I held up a single hand to silence him. 

“Do not apologize to me right now, Kaname.”

“I did not mean to hurt you.”

“Oh, don't try to lie to me, Kaname. I'm really not in the mood right now. You meant everything you did. You may not have meant to hurt me like you did, but you did the rest out of spite. To make a point.” He looked down at the floor and if I didn't know better I'd swear he was ashamed. “Consider your point made.” I had to close my eyes and fight off a wave of nausea. 

“Are you-”

“Okay? No. Not currently. You saw to that. But have no fear. I will be back to physical perfection in an hour or less. If that is your biggest worry then your conscience may rest easy.”

“You know that is not my only worry.”

“Really? You have hurt me several times tonight but you didn't seem to care before now.” He opened his mouth to say something then closed it again, looking down at the floor again. I tried to feel bad, staring at the incredibly sad image he made before me. Honestly, I did. I just couldn't find anything to give him right now but hurt, disappointment and regret. 

“When the sun sets tomorrow I want you to make your way back to whatever part of the world you were wooing before you felt I needed you to drop everything and come to my aid.” I could have said tonight but I was still trying to be nice. I'd give him a little time to make whatever arrangements he'd have to make.

“Yuki, I am so sorry! Let's just sit down and talk about this.” I laughed weakly.

“That's all you've been doing since you showed up in the middle of a fight that wasn't yours, to clean up a mess that wasn't yours, to insert your two-sense into political negotiations that weren't yours and to hurt something that is yours.” I took a deep steadying breath because the world swam a little as my anger tried to swim to the surface past the nausea. “I am through talking to you. If you are here when the sun rises thirty-six hours from now I can promise you, I won't be.” I watched a single tear trail down his face and my heart clenched tight but I wouldn't yield. He finally nodded, searching my face for anything that might help him but he found nothing. I began moving towards the door. 

“Where are you going?” He asked as I moved past him. 

“You may stay here.” His fingers gently grabbed my wrist. I stopped and fought to remain passive in his grip. My heart raced and tears scorched my throat, the nausea growing to the point where I thought I really would throw up. 

“Let me go, Kaname. I will not ask again.” The pain in my voice was thick enough to walk on. His fingers slipped from my wrist in a lingering caress that seemed to scream I'm sorry, please forgive me! I'd try but I wasn't sure I'd be able to. In a nutshell, he'd called me a pervert and a freak, sexually tortured me then proceeded to physically hurt me, to make a point. It didn't matter that he hadn't meant to physically hurt me or that I could heal it. It did matter that he hadn't realized he had hurt me until I was visibly injured. I was almost to the door when he spoke.

“How will we politically function if we cannot talk to each other.” I turned and smiled, more a grimace, at him.

“If you intend to use politics to win back favor you are so far from the mark you may as well already be half-way across the globe.” He looked stricken as if he hadn't expected me to see through his obvious ploy to get me to talk to him. If he wanted to pretend he was talking politics I could play that game too. “I think to avoid future situations like today we should consult each other before making major political moves, keep one another informed to avoid any further surprises.”

“And everything else? What about the small things?” I'm pretty sure he was no longer talking politics but I was going to pretend that he was. I offered him an empty, sad smile.

“I have always and will continue to trust in your ability to make sound decisions until you show me you cannot.” The implied one way mistrust struck him like a hammer between the eyes, widening those beautiful orbs. “You may fuck, weasel and murder whomever you feel necessary to get us where we need to be with my full consent.” I turned away and was twisting the knob in my hand when he spoke again. 

“I am sorry, Yuki.” Tears spilled up my throat, nearly choking me, to pour down my face. 

“I know you are.” I quickly opened the door, closing it firmly behind me as the first sob broke free. I was startled to see Takuma propped against the wall on the other side of the hallway, bored, lazily stirring a cup of tea that was no doubt heavily spiked with jam. He looked startled, worried and at a loss for what to do seeing me in tears. 

“Lady Yuki?” I very firmly shook my head at him when he tried to come near me. 

“I am fine. Kaname and I just had a little disagreement, that's all.” His eyes narrowed dangerously as he set his tea cup down and took a cautious step toward me. 

“He struck you.” It wasn't a question but a blank statement. I quickly shook my head. Not necessarily.

“No. Just an accident.” Hanabusa and Ruka came tearing around the corner. Oh great! I chastised myself mentally for not cleaning up in the bathroom before leaving the room. I'd forgotten how strong the smell of blood was to vampires in my haste to get away from Kaname This probably looked so bad. Hanabusa was suddenly in front of me, fingers in a firm grip on my chin, gently moving my head so that he could observe the no doubt technicolor bruise on my forehead. I watched that warmth leave him as his face closed down into a wintry cold, anger. He began to breeze past me toward the room I'd just vacated. Both Takuma and I grabbed an arm but he wasn't stopping. 

“Busa, please! It was an accident!” He did stop then, turning slowly, almost reluctantly to look down at me. He looked my face over and shook his head. 

“You smell of sex, tears, misery, pain and...” His eyes widened and he pulled me into his arms in a nearly fatally tight embrace. I hugged him back. 

“I smell it too Aido.” Takuma's voice was nearly pleasant, only a hint of anger hidden beneath. 

“As do I.” Ruka's voice was ripe with violence and I began to worry for my guards safety. I pulled back from Hanabusa, shoving a little when he wouldn't let go. 

“Smell what?” I demanded but I feared I already knew. We vampires couldn't die from wounds like my head injury but we could “visit death” as they liked to call it. He brushes us, letting us know that we were gravely wounded and, were we anything but what we are, would be in his grasp. Takuma was the one to answer. 

“You have been brushed by death this night, Lady Yuki.”

“I am having a hard time believing all of this was an 'accident'.” Busa, my sweet, charming, adorable Busa was nearly vibrating with rage, ready to rush in there and defend my honor. 

“Even if it wasn't an accident, which it was, he would kill all of you if you tried to go against him.”

“I do not care! No one gets to hurt you like that! No one.” Those last words were filled with so much cold rage I shivered. I shook my head and hugged him again, holding him tight.

“I care. He could never hurt me worse than if he took you from me. Any of you. I can't lose anyone else. I can't.” And that was the horrible truth, my greatest weakness. I took the lives of countless people who had loved ones and friends that would miss them while I held mine close and I hated it. His arms wrapped around me then moments later I felt and smelled Takuma's tall body press into mine, arms wrapping around both Busa and me. Ruka placed a single hand on my arm where it rested against Busa's lower back. The moment was perfectly warm and comforting. I allowed them only to hold me for a moment before I moved between them. They all stepped back so that I stood between the three of them. There was just one person I needed to see now to make the ending to this night perfect. But I had one last order to issue as Lady Yuki for the day. 

“I need one of you to make sure that Mr. Shiki is kept under heavy surveillance.”

“May we inquire as to the why behind your decision?” Takuma asked. I nodded. 

“I warned him before he left not to speak of anything he knows.”

“He couldn't possibly know much. You were only allied with Mr. Moto for less than twelve hours before you had Shiki removed from office.” I nodded. 

“It has been a long day. In such a short period of time Mr. Shiki has been exposed to quite a bit of damning knowledge about us. I did warn him.” They all nodded. 

“We know.” Takuma said. I took a deep breath, steadying myself for what I was about to say. 

“Put him under twenty-four hour surveilance.”

“For how long?” Ruka this time. 

“Until I deem him a threat to no one.”

“And if he proves to be a threat?” Takuma's eyes were perfectly calm, that glow of amusement I usually cherished replaced by something I couldn't put my finger on. I knew he was weighing me, trying to measure me but after having lived for as long as he had I really didn't know what or who he was comparing me to. 

“If he talks to anyone I expect that he and anyone he spoke with be quickly, quietly taken care of.” 

“You have never to my knowledge issued an order like this, Lady Yuki.” I smiled at the surprise in his voice. It was always entertaining to knock the old ones for a loop. He was correct. If I needed someone killed I usually did it myself. I had always thought that was the least I could do. But I was beginning to see the error of my ways. 

“No I have not. I am beginning to see that to rule I need to be a soldier when needed but I am the Lady of the vampires first and foremost, which requires me to pick my battles, not try to win every one of them from the front lines.” Takuma stared for a moment before bowing deeply. He spoke while bowed. 

“I may have underestimated you, my queen.” I smiled, touching my hand gently to the soft golden halo of those wonderfully golden locks. 

“Stand, Takuma.” I hated it when people bowed to me. He didn't stand until I pulled my hand from where I stroked through his hair. He smiled at me and I offered him one back. 

“If Shiki talks, kill him.” I said to no one in particular as I smiled at Takuma. 

“I will gladly do it myself.” Takuma said a note of genuine joy in his voice. I genuinely smiled. He was still mad about how the man had insulted me. 

“I know you would.” He had referred to me as his queen, an honor I had yet to hear bestowed upon Kaname despite their history. I knew he would do just about anything I said without opposition. “Unfortunately you will be leaving with Lord Kaname tomorrow when he returns to his duties so if it is to be done, it must be by someone else' hand.” The news seemed to be an utter shock to him and he quickly looked away.

“Why do you turn from me, Takuma?” He swallowed before looking back to me. 

“It was my understanding that we were to remain here with you at the academy for some time until things settle once again. Plans have changed?” His eyes flicked up to the throbbing ache on my forehead before locking on my eyes. I smiled. 

“They have.” I gave him no more. His beautiful face fell into worried lines. “Do not worry for my safety, Takuma I have many guards here at the academy, quite a few of them are vampires and I can take care of myself.” He laughed and nodded.

“Indeed you can.” I patted his arm as I moved past him. Busa and Ruka parted and turned as if getting ready to flank me. I spoke without stopping or turning to them. 

“No. I do not need nor want company right now. I will not leave the dorm. I simply wish to walk through and familiarize myself with it. I will find you when I have found a room I like.” They stopped and seemed to be debating on whether to follow me anyway. 

“Leave her to herself. Much has happened today, she has a great many things to think about.” I smiled slightly at the calm, understanding tone in Takuma's voice as he reassured Busa and Ruka before I allowed myself to get lost in both the hallways and my thoughts. 

…........................................

The hallways were labyrinthine and lavishly decorated with paintings, suits of armor, stone busts of endless varieties. Every hallway had a different theme, painted different colors and as hard as I tried to discern when exactly the paint had shifted from blue to yellow or maroon to turquoise I continually failed. It was all very intricately done. Each hallway offered so much that I could probably walk the building a hundred times and still see something new every time. The foyer was breathtaking. The marble floor was one giant mosaic of our solar system, each planet done in startling detail as if to say “You are here.”. The ceiling was of the milky way and shimmered and twinkled as I walked. There was no chandelier to distract the eye from the view of the room. I couldn't really tell where the light source in the room was coming from. As near as I could tell the light came from the ceiling itself. The carpet running up the grand staircases that curled down either side of the massive room was a deep color that was a deep blue or purple, I couldn't tell it seemed to be shifting as I moved, with golden and silver thread twisting and twining through it in a devastatingly beautiful dance of light. I must have stood there for at lest twenty minutes trying to take it all in and still I always found something new to marvel at. 

I began making my way down the hallways on the other side of the dorm, deciding I could stand there all night if I let myself. I was so lost to the beauty of the dorm that I nearly jumped out of my skin when I looked up to see Zero standing at the end of the hallway I was exploring. My heart beat a little faster the way it always had when he was around. 

“Have you looked at the rooms yet?” I shook my head. “They're quite exquisite.” I raised an eyebrow. Zero didn't strike me as a person that would take the time to appreciate art, which is exactly what this whole dorm was. He began moving slowly down the hallway towards me. 

“Are they as beautiful as the hallways?” He quickly looked around him before smiling. 

“For the most part. None are quite like the foyer though.” I laughed.

“Nothing could compare to that!” He smiled.

“How could you know that when you haven't seen everything the building has to offer?” I shook my head.

“I just know.” He shrugged, stopping a few feet back from me. 

“A matter of opinion, I suppose.” I nodded and began walking down the hallway again. His fingers brushed the back of my hand as I moved past him, stopping me. I glanced down at his hand where it had fallen back to his side then up into those violet eyes. 

“Would you like to accompany me in my wandering curiosity?” He smiled slightly.

“I probably won't be very good company compared to the kind you usually keep.” I scowled and punched him in the arm.

“Ow!” He said as he rubbed his new bruise. 

“I have always enjoyed your company.” He frowned at me. 

“Not as of lately you haven't.” Well that was debatable, but I didn't say that of course. I shrugged and looped my arm around his as I began moving us slowly down the hallway. 

“Maybe that can change.” He was quiet for so long we made it through two hallways before he spoke, gently using my arm wrapped around his to pull us to a stop. He stared very intensely into my eyes.

“I'm going to ask you some questions and you need to answer them truthfully.” I blinked up at him for a second and sighed, nodding. 

“What did you do earlier to contain the explosion?”

“How do you know it was contained?”

“I was there remember? I was surrounded on all sides when I felt and smelled the explosion go off. I heard the roar of the blast. It distracted me enough that two of my assailants got the drop on me.” I so didn't want to think about the fact that I'd almost lost him. “I went back. I saw the damage.”

“Yeah. The damage is extensive and will be mighty costly to repair.” 

“Not as extensive or as costly as it could have been. I know how badly it should have gone, but it didn't because of you.” 

“How do you know it was me that stopped it? There were plenty of others there that could have done it.”

“No. There weren't.” He stared at me as if trying to figure out why I didn't want to admit to what I had done. “I had heard that your specialty was in manipulating energy.”

“I am particularly good at that, yes.” He laughed.

“Pretty damn good if you ask me.”

“I ask again, how do you know I stopped it?” He was quiet for a moment.

“Why is it so difficult for you to admit that you stopped the explosion?” I looked into those curious eyes and tried to find an answer, one that made sense to both of us. “You saved everyone at that dance tonight, Yuki. It is a good thing.” I shook my head and he frowned at me.

“Nothing good comes without a price.” I looked to the floor and had to blink rapidly to keep the tears gathering in my eyes from falling. 

“I saw the scorch marks.” I rolled my eyes up to see him staring at me then quickly away. I didn't want to hear what he was about to say. I didn't think I could handle being called a monster again. Not today. 

“Are you going to call me names and point fingers too?” My voice sounded bland, tired. He cocked his head to the side and frowned at me. 

“Who has called you names? What names?” I shook my head and smiled tentatively.

“I have been called many names today. You have been privy to some of them.” He raised an eyebrow at that.

“I have? Really?”

“Don't play coy with me, Zero. I have no patience for it tonight. I saw you in the conference room. I know you were there. Did you like the show?” Anger flashed across his face but it wasn't directed at me.

“Not particularly.” He was silent for a minute, eyes searching my face as if he was calculating something. “But I did like watching you handle the situation. You are quite good at politicking you know.” I smiled sadly.

“I guess it's fortunate that I am.”

“Given your choice of partners I'd say it's a hell of a bonus.” I nodded and smiled while his face fell flat. “What will you do if Shiki doesn't heed your gag warning?” I gave him my professional smile as I answered.

“Kill him.” His eyes went a little wide at that but he didn't say a word against my decision.

“I saw the scorch marks, Yuki. The air reeked of burning flesh.” I looked away down the hall. He stepped back into my line of sight, crouching slightly so that he could see my face. “Did you do that?” There was no running from what I'd done so I simply answered, but I didn't like it.

“Yes.” I waited, waited for him to scream and yell and call me a monster but he didn't. He stood straight, stared at me for a handful of moments and then dipped his head in acknowledgment. His lack of reaction startled me and I couldn't help but poke at it.

“You're not going to scream at me?” He huffed a small laugh and turned, beginning to mosey down the hall again. He held his arm out and I took the invitation to sidle closer to him at face value. We walked arm in arm down the hallway. He didn't speak until we were halfway down another. 

“You're not a monster, Yuki.” I was so startled by his declaration that I stumbled. His arm tightened and he slid his other hand on top of mine, steadying me. He stared straight forward as if he couldn't bear to look at me as he spoke. “I was raised, born into this hatred for vampires. It's a part of me. And I have killed. I've killed countless Level Es in the five years you've been gone. When I started killing them it felt good, I felt like I was saving people by hunting the vermin into extinction.” He was quiet for a few moments and I could visibly see him gathering his courage, holding it close to his chest.

“I'm not sure when being a hunter lost it's glow but one day as I stared down the barrel of bloody rose at one of them I realized I pitied them. I didn't want to kill them. You were right Yuki.” I was? He took a deep breath and shook his head. “I tried to hate vampires just for being what they were based on principals that don't really matter. They have alternative food sources that keep them from feeding on humans and the death of my parents? Well...any act of murder starts a vicious cycle of vengeance that might never end. They killed Shizuka's love so she killed the ones I loved and in turn I killed countless others who at one time or another had people who loved them. It never ends. One day I'll kill the wrong person and someone they love will claim my life in vengeance.” He did stop then as if he needed full concentration for his next revelation. 

“The truth is, I never stopped to think about it until you came back and made me. I thought about killing you so that you didn't have to live like this. Oh yes, I thought about it almost non-stop when you first came back to the academy. I had countless opportunities, opportunities you left open. I don't know if you did it to test me or if you even knew I was there, but you did know that I might kill you and you didn't seem to care. But I did, I cared and I hated myself for it. I beat myself up about it. I hated that every time I smelled you, saw you, tasted you it made me weak.” He shook his head and pulled away from me, wandering over to a suit of armor like he was going to examine it closely. All I could do was stand there in awe as he told me everything I had wanted to hear. It was too good to be true. 

“That first week after you returned was the hardest week of my life. I skulked around and as much as I wanted to, I never got close, never allowed myself to talk to you, only to watch, to search for a reason, anything would have done. I was waiting for you to show me that the old Yuki had been swallowed by the monster you had become, as you'd said before leaving. I searched for that monster. I wanted you to be monstrous...but you weren't.” He was shaking his head, sending all those long silver locks swaying across his broad shoulders. He laughed suddenly and I jumped a little. “You were just as clever as you'd always been. You saw my game and turned it on me. At every turn you brought the monster out in me. I tried to get you to succumb to your hunger and feed on me and I fed on you. I laid tests out for you and in the end I wound up failing the very same tests. Even now when I confront you about you killing people and plotting the death of another I see the regret in your eyes, the hatred. You hate what you have become. Not the vampire, you don't mind that. You hate the queen you are forced to be because that is what you are. I see it, Yuki. And for better or for worse I can't see a monster in you.” Something close to a sob sounded but was cut of abruptly. “You're not a monster, Yuki.” The last was said on a whisper. I could smell his tears on the air and my heart hurt like a giant squeezed it tight in his fist, my eyes swelled over with tears of my own. I wanted to go to him so badly my skin itched with the desire but I stayed where I was. 

“You realize that means you too are not a monster.” I could hear my heart in my throat. Could he? He laughed a sad sound and nodded. He turned around and my heart broke. Those huge lavender eyes were glassy as they filled and leaked tears down his the flawless, pale perfection of his face. He took a step toward me then stopped, a look of pain on his face. I fought with everything I had not to run to him and hold him close while I kissed away his pain. 

“You have stolen everything from me, Yuki: my rage, the hunt, my mind...my heart.” He closed his eyes and tipped his head back, hands balled into fists at his side. “When I even think about you in danger I can't breathe, can't think. It's like everything just loses it's capacity to function. And you are always in danger.” He swallowed hard several times. “It only takes being around you and I lose control of my body.” 

He opened his eyes and stared at me, really stared at me from head to foot the way he'd done that night in the bathroom, like he was undressing me with his mind. My heart raced and that thing low inside me clenched so hard and fast I gasped. I could smell his arousal on the air and I couldn't keep myself from going to him. I didn't want to stay away from him. His eyes followed me and I could almost taste his racing heart on the back of my tongue. I pressed my body against his and wrapped my arms around him, laying my head on his chest. His arms wrapped around me without hesitation. We stood there like that and only our racing hearts and too fast breathing punctuated the silence. Time meant nothing. I wanted more than anything in the world to hold his naked body against mine. I closed my eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath before taking a step back. His arms fell away without question but he was pleasantly startled when I took his hand in mine, twining our fingers together. I smiled at him and the one he gave me in turn was absolutely beautiful, breathtaking. I began moving us down the hallway. 

“Have you picked a room yet?” He cleared his throat before answering.

“Yes.” 

“Do you remember your way back to it?” I heard his heart rate double and smiled.

“Yes.”

“Then lead the way.”

“You want to see my room?” I smiled up at him. 

“I would like to go back to your room, get down to as little clothes as possible,” Preferably none, “and both hold you and be held by you, if you don't mind that is.” He swallowed hard before shaking his head. 

“Sounds wonderful.” He led us around the corner and turned a devious smile on me that made my heart stop then beat triple time to catch up. My heart always did funny things around him, like he should come with a label, WARNING: product is hazardous to health. Anyone with heart problems should turn the fuck around and leave immediately. 

“Is this your ploy to get me out of my clothes?” I struggled to breath for a second before laughing. He smiled, something I'd never see enough of. 

“Maybe.” And that one word was filled with so much sexual promise that there really wasn't much talking to be done after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N- Hey guys so here it is, hot off the press. Please be kind and don't judge any gramatical/spelling errors too harshly. I tried my best to edit the biggest bulk of the first 2/3 of this chapter. The last third was just...yeah. I will try to have the next chapter to you soon but for now I hope you enjoyed this super long, juicy chapter! Peace out, lovelies! ;-*
> 
> P.S. I'd love to hear some reactions to this chapter. So much happened, there's just no way ya'll don't have something to say.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAPTER FOUR
> 
> A/N- Greetings again, my friends. Firstly, I want to take a moment to thank all of those who expressed their interest in me continuing the story after I went on a very long hiatus. I do apologize for making you wait so long but life sort of kicked my legs from beneath me. I'm back now so I really hope you enjoy this chapter! Tell me what you think, okay?
> 
> Alright, without further ado I give you the next sneak peek into my world! Enjoy!
> 
> QUICK DISCLAIMER- Shit is about to get real emotional, graphic in every way and intense as fuck up in this chapter. There will be hurt/comfort and some of ya'll are going to have a lot to say.

I'll be quite honest, I didn't really see the room at all. All I could look at was Zero, the way his body moved in a lithe line of muscle and strength as he moved around the dark room. A light came on by the bed, bright enough to cast a dim glow in the darkness so that I knew his room was incredibly large. I could see that his bed was huge, much bigger than a California King. He moved slowly back towards me, stopping several feet back. My skin ached for his touch. I didn't want him so far away so I began closing the distance between us. He watched me come and I could see his heart in his throat. I stopped inches from him and stared up at him as I slid my hands softly over the expanse of his stomach, up his chest, under the short, ragged jacket, of the costume he was still wearing, as I slowly slid it off those incredibly wide shoulders. I licked my lips as that pale, pale skin was laid bare before me. With nothing to distract the eyes I was left staring at that broad chest, the pectoral muscles guiding the eyes down to the taught plains of his abs. I balled my hands into fists at my sides to keep from reaching out and tracing my fingers along the sharp V of his hips as they disappeared into the black sash sitting so dangerously low. I noticed that his shoes were gone, leaving his feet bare on the plush carpet underfoot, nothing like the hardwood floor of my room. He smiled at me and I found myself giving him one in return. 

He slowly moved, quite as the wind after a storm, behind me, pressing his body against mine. My heart hammered in my chest so hard it was difficult to breathe. My stomach fluttered with the wings of a million butterflies as his fingers deftly popped the first button of my shirt open. The fluttering in my stomach worsened the closer he got to the finish line. When the shirt fluttered open with the last button undone he didn't stop there. 

I stopped breathing as his fingers ghosted along the flesh just above where my shorts sat low on my hips. His clever fingers popped the button on my shorts; My heart stuttered and I forgot how to breathe. The sound of my zipper was incredibly loud in the dark of his room. He trailed his fingers back up my sides, only gently brushing the sides of my breasts but my body reacted, nipples hardening. He never touched my breasts as he slid my shirt off my shoulders and down my arms but that one graze along them had set my body on fire. I felt him lean down. 

“Breathe.” The word was breathed so softly, so close to my ear that his lips tickled along the edge of it. I shivered and took a shuddering breath that sounded embarrassingly loud. I felt his lips pull into a smile before he lightly ran his nose up my neck, burying it in the hair just behind my ear. My skin erupted in goosebumps as he took the smell of me deep into his lungs. I had a moment to thank the gods I had stopped off in one of the bathroom's in the endless string of rooms to take a quick shower. Every bathroom was so nicely stocked with fancy smelling soaps. 

He grabbed my hips and pulled my body against his. We both made a small sound as my bare back met the naked expanse of his chest. I shuddered as he flattened one of his hands across my stomach, holding me firmly against him. A sigh shuddered out from him. I turned and wrapped my arms around him, my face against his chest. He took a hissing inhale and wrapped his arms around me. We stayed like that, listening to each others racing hearts. He pulled back from me sliding one hand across my shoulders, and down my arm as he moved back until his fingers twined with mine. I both visibly and audibly heard his heart nearly triple as he looked at me wearing nothing but a small pair of jean shorts and the black heels I'd started the night in. The hose and garters were in a trash can in one of the bathrooms somewhere on the other side of the building. The heels were much more comfortable with the hose, but were bearable without them. 

He guided me toward the bed, letting go of my hand at the foot of the monstrous thing as he climbed across it. My mouth watered watching the muscles in his back roll underneath the pale silk of his skin. He turned and lay on his back, chest slightly elevated because of the mound of pillows behind him. He held a hand out to me and I was suddenly moving across the bed towards him without thinking about it. One moment his face held everything I wanted to see: rapture, lust, that dark gleam men get in there eyes when sex is on the table. The next he was frowning, angry and something that was so primal I couldn't find a word to describe it. I watched his stomach muscles bunch as he sat up and got on his knees, closing the few feet of distance between us, stopping half a foot away. He reached his fingers out and gently brushed his fingers over a spot on my shoulder. I glanced down and saw the dull, shiny, pink scar on my shoulder that he ran his fingers over. Just like that I snapped back to myself. I was off the bed before he even registered I'd moved, the shock on his face was very apparent. I wasn't angry but I just no longer wanted him to see me. To see the stories written in the scars across my body

I, like Kaname, could use my powers to manipulate how I physically appeared. I usually maintained that glamour to hide my battle scars. I tried to put it back in place but I couldn't seem to concentrate enough right now. I shook my head, tears welling in my eyes as I turned and made my way back to where my shirt had fallen. I heard Zero curse with real feeling under his breath as I gave him my back, showing him more of the hideous things. I snatched my shirt off the floor and was shrugging it on when I felt Zero's hand on my shoulder, not rough or demanding, just a gentle touch that froze me in place.

“Why are you hiding yourself from me, Yuki?” I swallowed hard, blinking rapidly to fend off the tears threatening to spill over. 

“Its just a habit, a facade I have to maintain for the cameras. The humans think us invincible. I can't let them think otherwise. If they know we can be hurt they'll do everything in their power to figure out how and when they do-” I shook my head and couldn't bring myself to finish the thought aloud. If they ever discovered our weakness vampires as a species would be in danger of extinction. It both baffled and scared me that the vampire hunters had held the secret of anti-vampire weapons as closely to the chest as us. 

“That doesn't explain why you maintain your glamour even among your own people.” I could have spouted a half-truth about how people value less what they know can be broken but I didn't. Instead I hated myself for the tears that slipped down my face. I casually swiped them away though there was no way of hiding it from Zero. Damn vampires and their super noses. I heaved a sigh and decided that if he wanted to know I would tell him. I was tired of dancing around secrets. I shouldn't have to do it with the ones I loved but unfortunately I had found that sometimes, as much as one might hate it, keeping secrets from those you loved was necessary. This was not that kind of secret, though Kaname certainly wouldn't like me telling Zero. I thought about it for a moment then shrugged, more to myself than anything. Fuck him. I was pissed at him right now. 

“You really want to know?” He paused for a moment.

“Yes.” I nodded and realized I suddenly didn't want to tell him just so that I didn't have to say it aloud and wished he'd said no. 

“I hide them because Kaname can't seem to get past the scars. For whatever reason, if any of them are exposed he stares at it until I cover it.” I hugged myself and let one of my most embarrassing moments sweep over me, letting it pour out for Zero to hear. “After I received my first scar on my stomach whenever we had sex he would only be able to finish if I wasn't facing him. Then I received several more, two of which were on my back. He avoided having sex with me for a while at first. Then we only had sex with the lights off. I thought when we started having sex with the lights on again that maybe he was getting used to them. But I started noticing that the only time he wanted to have sex was when we were somewhere moderately public and extremely risky. I thought it was the thrill of getting caught or something but then I realized it was because we both remained mostly clothed when we fucked that way.” I took a deep breath as tears flowed down my face before continuing. 

“Then on a diplomatic trip to a small village in Africa we ran across something we'd never encountered before. We went there to ransom in person for the release of our people whom they had somehow enslaved. A woman, a witch, was not in charge technically but her power...she wielded so much power that no one dared defy her. So, for all intents and purposes she was their leader. From the moment we stepped foot on her people's land we could feel her power. It was like walking through water, and breathing? That was an interesting task.” I shook my head. “So much power. The closer we got to her the harder it got to breathe, the more it crept along our skin. When we saw our people-” I took a step from Zero and began pacing, the memory setting me on edge. 

“I can't even begin to explain how they looked. It was like she'd hollowed them out, taken everything that made them who they were and filled them with her power. She told Kaname that if he could withstand her powers she would release our people. I tried to convince him not to do it. We had no idea what powers she could wield. 'These are our people, Yuki. If we can't save them then no one will and they are lost.' He went to her and between the two of them the magic was so thick in the air that breathing was nearly impossible. The battle was pretty evenly matched until our people under her control, without a word spoken from her, suddenly attacked us, me and our guards. Kaname got distracted. Everything happened so fast.” I shook my head hard, sending my hair flying around my shoulders. “I still remember the awful sound of Kaname's scream. I've never heard anyone scream like that.” I had to stop and just breathe past the tight knot my heart had twisted into for a few moments. 

“He was on his knees before her, spine bowed back so far that I could see his face, hands clawing at the air. His eyes were rolled so far back into his head they were completely white, her hands on either side of his head were the only thing keeping him from falling to the ground. The black of her lipstick was smeared across his mouth that was open wide as he screamed as fast as he could draw breath. I didn't know what to do. We were surrounded and losing. Kaname had lost his battle.” 

“Yuki, you don't have to-” I held up a hand and he fell quiet. I'd started telling it and now I had to finish it. I just had to. 

“That was the first time I knew I could manipulate energy. I discovered it in a moment of pure desperation. I sucked up all the magic she'd leaked everywhere and used it to kill her. I thought killing her would end it but it made things worse. Our people that had been under her control fell to their knees and screamed, clawing at their faces. Kaname didn't stop screaming either, he just writhed on the ground blind to everything around him. The ones we'd come to save suddenly stood up, faces nothing but shredded, red masks and came at us like animals. They attacked indiscriminately, slaughtering the village people as if they couldn't tell friend from foe. I had no choice. I had to kill them in order to save us but I didn't kill them soon enough. I didn't save everyone. We lost two of our guards in that battle.”

“Why are you telling me this?” I hadn't talked to anyone about what had happened in that village. I still had nightmares about that place, everything painted red with the blood of the village people and the imploded vampires we'd gone to save.

“Kaname still screamed and writhed on the ground like he was in pain. I wanted to go to him but Senri wrapped me in his arms to keep me away. I struggled against him and Akatsuki stepped in front of me, blocking my view of Kaname, shouting over his screaming so that I could hear him. 'We have no idea what kind of magic this is, Lady Yuki. If you go to him and it spreads to you we could very well lose the both of you and I'm sorry but we can't allow that.'” I had to close my eyes, skin breaking out in chills as Akatsuki's voice spoke only in my head, never again to be heard aloud. “I calmed as we tried to figure out how to help him but we were at a loss. We couldn't transport him if we couldn't touch him and we didn't want to use magic on him for fear of it reacting badly with whatever she'd done to him. We were all panicking, but none so much as Ruka. We should have been watching her more closely. I saw her resolve crack and screamed for someone to stop her as she raced toward Kaname, crying as if he were already dead. Even as I screamed it I knew we'd all be too late. Akatsuki was the closest to her. He tried, he really did. The second she touched him we all knew the nature of the magic. Her eyes rolled back into her head and Kaname and her ravaged one another. All we could do was watch in open mouthed horror as they tore the clothes from one another and fed at each other's bodies like they were starving for the feed.” Zero's face was aghast, mouth hanging open in a painfully similar way to how we had looked. . 

“Kaname and Ruka? They-” He cut himself off but I knew what he'd meant. I smiled at him and nodded. 

“Yep, non-stop for nearly three whole days.” His eyes widened to the point where I thought they might fall out of his head. His reaction was too perfect.

“What did you all do while they...”

“While they fucked each other's brains out?” 

“Yeah.” I shrugged 

“We thought we'd just let them at it until the magic burned off. After they carried on like that for a day or so and they just kept going we decided to try to find some help. We found a shaman several villages over and asked that he come consult for us. After telling him exactly what had happened and showing him the result he informed us that the magic they were under was one meant to consume everything it touched in 'the flames of carnal pleasures'. One would feed at the other until either one or both of them died or they were strong enough to burn through the magic before it burned them up. He advised us to remain cautious and steer clear of them because if one of them died the other would either find another partner or burn from the inside out with unquenchable desire.”

“There was no way to stop it?” 

“Nope. It was originally intended for her to be able to feed from the sexual energy and life force of those afflicted but with no one there to control it the magic once unleashed could run rampant as long as there was another victim for it, spreading by the simplest of touches.” I shook my head. “At first we stayed in the hut, over-looking their...activities to ensure that they didn't actually kill each other. Akatsuki was the first to leave the hut, then Senri. Seiren stuck it out the longest but eventually even she left. I stood alone in that hut for hours, watching them roll naked and writhing across the floor covered in sweat, blood and other fluids. I don't think I'll ever forget how they moved together. No matter how many times they came they just seemed to burn for more.” 

“Jesus.” I nodded. I had lived for nearly two more days wondering if I'd lose Kaname and Ruka, watching them off and on for hours on end.

I shuddered, remembering the way Ruka had ridden him, fingers carving thin, bloody trails down his chest and the way he bellowed for her. Or the way he had so roughly flipped her onto her stomach, balling his hand in her hair, using it as a handle to pull her against him and slam his way inside her. Her body arched back against his, breasts bouncing with every thrust...and the way he growled as he sank his fangs into her neck. Her scream crept along my skin even now. Her darker skin against the pale of his as they moved in an endless cycle of pleasure was hypnotic. I remember the distinct urge at some point to scream at them, “This is reality, not fucking porn! It can't feel that good for fuck's sake!” 

Of all the positions they had fucked in I was haunted by one in particular. Ruka sat in his lap, legs wrapped around his hips, head back in ecstasy, one arm around his shoulders, the other hand twined through his hair. His hands gripped her ass, arms corded with muscle as he helped her ride him, mouth feeding at her breast. He pulled free from her with a wet pop, throwing his head back, her blood trailing down from the corner of his mouth, as they both shuddered and screamed their pleasure to the sky. While he still cried out for her she cradled his face between both hands, riding him for all she was worth as she kissed him deep, swallowing his moans. I shook free of the memories of that night, getting back to the story. 

“I was bent out of shape, but Akatsuki...” I turned from Zero. “He loved her. Gods he loved her. He'd loved her for so long. He was inconsolable, sitting in a corner of one of the huts on the opposite side of the village. He wouldn't let anyone but me near him.” I put a hand to my heart like that would stop the pain searing it. “I quietly held him for hours, running my fingers through his hair and along his back and finally he broke. He huddled around me like I was the last candle in the dark and cried. But he never spoke a word.” A fresh wave of grief racked me as I remembered the sight of such a strong, proud man bending and twisting as much of that tall lithe body as he could so that it fit in my lap or around me. 

“Did you cry with him?” I shook my head.

“No.” But I cried now. I cried once again for my lost friend. Grief was a funny thing. Just when you thought you'd healed, it came along and gutted you again. 

“Why not?” 

“Because he needed me. I was his anchor in a world turned topsy-turvy. He cried for us both while I gave him the only thing I could.” I had held him while his heart broke but who was there to hold me when my heart broke over him? I shoved the anger that was trying to rise up right back down.

“I'm going to assume they both made it out of there since they're both here.” I nodded.

“Yep. Three days of moaning, groaning and screaming. They both fell into a coma after, their bodies depleted of energy, blood count well below what it should have been, dehydrated. The shaman told us they needed to feed or they wouldn't wake up, but they needed to wake up to feed. He gave us a needle and tube, advised feeding them at least twice a day, said he had nothing left to offer us and that he would pray for us and left. Senri was the first one to go in. When he didn't turn unto a ravenous sex beast we all took turns hooking ourselves up to the tubes and waited.”

“How long did they sleep?”

“Almost two weeks to the day they went into the coma. We hunted and ate anything in the surrounding area to keep our blood supply up, slept in shifts and checked on them religiously, donating blood to them twice, sometimes three times a day in hopes that they would wake up.”

“How many of you were there?” I heaved a heavy sigh.

“Four.”

“Four! How the hell did you manage that? Why didn't you call for help?” I turned to look at him.

“A cell phone isn't of much use when the nearest cell tower is over a hundred miles away. And we mostly hunted and slept to keep up our strength and donated blood. A week and a half in Seiren no longer had the strength to donate, she couldn't even hunt. The constant blood depletion, combined with the diet of strictly animal blood was too much. Three days later they woke up but were unable to move on their own, their bodies too sore, despite the two week long slumber. By that point Akatsuki, Senri and I had lost an average of forty pounds a piece and were worn ragged. The only way out of that village was on foot.”

“How the hell were you alive? Losing forty pounds should have killed you!” I smiled weakly.

“I admit that I was indeed quite a frightening sight to behold. Had they kept on for any longer I would likely have died in that village. However, I have discovered that you only discover how truly strong you are when you need your strength the most.” He nodded once, accepting my answer.

“How did all of you get out of there?”

“We all carried someone. I carried Ruka, Akatsuki carried Kaname and Senri carried Seiren. In our diminished state I can honestly say, it was probably one of the most physically taxing things I've ever done. We stumbled across sixty miles through the grasslands to our truck which had stalled out at the border of the tribe's land to find that our people had formed a search and rescue party.”

“Then why couldn't they find you?” I laughed.

“Apparently the magic she had soaked her village in acted as a sort of mystical force field and when I absorbed it and killed the witch she somehow permanently transported the entire village to another plane of existence, that apparently was where the damned thing resided anyway. Or at least that was how it was explained to me. Unless we physically left and brought someone in with us you could walk right through the village and see nothing, nor would we. It's kind of awesome actually. Unless she wanted you to find them you never would.” We were both silent for a few minutes before he quietly cleared his throat.

“Not that I don't...appreciate the insight into what you've been up to the past few years but why did you tell me this.”

“The witch's magic had a lasting effect. Kaname and Ruka were nearly inseparable for more than six months after that. They got naked together every chance they got.”

“How did that not bother you?” I scoffed then laughed, a loud, harsh burst of sound.

“It did bother me. Ruka has been in love with Kaname for almost as long as Akatsuki had been in love with her. I didn't blame her for being unable to fight the witch's magic. I didn't blame either of them, but especially not Ruka. I don't know whether I hated their union more because of how it hurt Akatsuki, Ruka's impending heart break when the magic finally wore off or if I was just being selfish.” 

“How were you being selfish?” He sounded slightly outraged. 

“I tried to seduce him. I tried to lure him to my body instead of Ruka's. Every time met in failure. He only desired Ruka. All my attempts did was frustrate us both. 'I want to desire you, Yuki. I am damned to lust for her...but I love you.' That's what he told me about two months after we'd left what had happened in Africa behind us. Except it wasn't behind us. So, I just abandoned my own needs, ignored them, only partially slaking them when seduction was part of our political game. I'm ashamed to admit that I began looking forward to sexual interludes with sleazy politicians. I took my pleasures where I could find them.” I bit my lip, blinking away the tears gathering in my eyes. “We went to bed one random night and for the first time in over six months he suddenly sprung a boner. We were thrilled. I was fucking ecstatic!” I cleared my throat as tears threatened to clog it up.

“In the beginning when all these new powers were uncontrollable for the most part I couldn't hold or really even use my glamour but by that point I'd perfected it, thinking he didn't want me because of my scars. I'd gotten really good at maintaining it.” I scoffed. “I wasn't as good as I thought. About three minutes into the actual sex when I climaxed, in that moment of total abandon, my control fled. I didn't even notice until his erection began to flag. I knew he hadn't finished and couldn't figure out why he'd gone soft. He was on top of me, completely still. I thought something was wrong when he refused to look at me. When I realized he was staring at my scars I was livid, heartbroken. I shoved him off of me, put my clothes on and left while he was still babbling. I couldn't tell you what he'd said if my life depended on it.” It was so quiet in the room that the sound of Zero's racing heart and too fast breathing sounded thunderous. For no reason at all I began to cry, biting my lip to keep most of it in. I sucked in a sharp breath and blew it out. 

“After that night he stopped bedding Ruka. It was a long time before she would even talk to me after that. I know why he stopped fucking her. He did it for me. To prove he didn't need her anymore. But I'm not stupid. I see the way his eyes follow her. I know he still wants her and I don't think that will ever change.”

“And that bothers you.” Not a question just a statement. I shook my head, wiping uselessly at the tears silently falling down my face. 

“Not anymore. I think I just don't care. I used to but I've shared too much of him for far too long. I think I've grown accustomed to it.” His arms wrapped around me and he hugged me to him. 

“You shouldn't have to, dammit.” His voice was squeezed tight with a cold rage. I smiled and patted his arms where they wrapped around my chest. 

“It's fine, Zero.” He suddenly whirled me to face him so fast my shirt flared open around me. I quickly, reflexively grabbed the lapels and wrapped it tight to hide my scars. His eyes tracked the movement and there was an anger so pure in them but then that gave way to a look that made my heart flutter in my chest, a look of compassion, longing, possession and...love. 

“Don't you ever let me hear that from you again Yuki Cross. Do you hear me? Don't ever let me see you settling for less than you deserve ever again. He has you and doesn't know what to do with you. I want you, would wrest all the stars from their home in the heavens if they'd only compare to your light...and I can't have you.” There was real regret and pain in his eyes. Fresh tears rolled down my face as I stared at the fierce love lighting those lavender eyes like gemstones in the dark. He slid his fingers along the lapels of my shirt until his hands rested on top mine over my stomach. 

“Please, don't hide from me, Yuki. Let me see you. All of you.” I fought with my inner demons, struggling to overcome the self conscious beast that had taken up residence in me. In the end it was the love, patience and hope in the eyes of the man kneeling before me that won out as I dropped my arms to my sides and gave myself to him, trusting that he wouldn't break me. 

He slowly slid my shirt back off before dropping to his knees in front of me, trailing his fingers down my body. He stared into my eyes as he hooked his finger under the denim waistband of my shorts. I fought for breath as he slipped them gently, delicately down my legs, lifting one foot at a time until he threw them over his shoulder. I stood completely naked before him and was torn between wanting to go for a towel or something to cover up with and ravishing the man before me. He broke my gaze and sat back on his heels roving his eyes very, very slowly up my body. When he got to my face the lavender of his eyes was swirling with garnet turning them into something absolutely stunning. He was breathing hard as he leaned forward, eyes rolled up to mine as he kissed his way along the long, thin scar on my lower stomach, a few inches below my belly button. I closed my eyes and tipped my head back, sighing at the immeasurably gentle, feather-light caress of his lips across the sensitive skin of my scar. My knees were shaky by the time he reached the other end of the scar and when he ran his tongue along it my knees buckled. His hands caught me, parting my legs on either side of his hips so that I sat on his lap. My insides quivered as he ran his fingers up my spine, stopping to trace the stab wound just off to the left, about four inches from my heart. He froze. 

“This was very close.” I nodded. 

“I almost died.” Multiple times actually but I wasn't going to say that. He shuddered before he looked up at me. 

“Don't you ever do that. Don't die on me, Yuki.” What could I say to that? I was trying to think through a response to that but then he nuzzled his nose up the side of my neck and I couldn't do anything but shiver for him. The tips of his fangs grazed my neck and I moaned. He slid his hands up my back, burying one of them into my hair and then my heart stopped. My world exploded, falling around me in pieces as we kissed for the first time. His lips were softer than I'd ever imagined, moving against mine like silk given life. I slipped my tongue between those so soft lips, dancing it between his fangs. Kissing a vampire was an art I had long since perfected. He moaned into my mouth, sending my heart into spastic seizures and the kiss deepened into something burning with passion and an edge of desperation built from a desire cooked up over long years. So many almost kisses, so many times we'd held each other close, wanting but never daring. 

He broke the kiss first and we both gasped for air. We laughed and I twined my fingers in his hair kissing him again. He groaned and I broke the kiss with a squeal when he exploded up off the floor, launching me. I was air-borne for a second before I landed on the bed with a bounce. I laughed past my heart trying to come out my throat and sat up to see him stalking towards the bed, a predatorial sway to his walk. I swallowed hard and something clenched low within me so hard I gasped as he began unwrapping the sash around his hips. The sash fell to the floor and I either lost time or he moved just that quickly but one moment he was wearing the white hakama, the next he was naked. I moaned and without thinking began moving toward him. He was suddenly kneeling right in front of me. Stripped out of clothing he was more glorious than in them. 

I marveled at the way every muscle of his tall, lithe body flowed seamlessly into the next like a perfectly carved marble sculpture with skin stretched over it. His cock stood out from his body and it wasn't his length that was impressive but his girth. He stared down at me and I showed him with my eyes that I wanted him more than I'd ever wanted anything. He growled and then I was pinned beneath his body. He watched my face as he slid down until he could flick his tongue across my nipple. I grabbed his hair and yanked him up so that I could kiss him hard and deep. I broke away and held his face between my hands, staring into his eyes, now that rich swirling red, from inches away. 

“I want you, Zero. I want you now. No more waiting, we've already waited too long.” 

“Are you sure?” I'd never been more sure of anything in my life. I put everything I wanted from him into my eyes and my voice when it came was husky with sex. 

“Fuck me, Zero.” I ground my hips up into him to emphasize exactly what I wanted. His eyes slid closed and he moaned lightly. He wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me, sitting back on his heels. His lips fed at mine as my body began to roll against his on its own. I was so wet that his lower stomach was slick with my juices. He made some noise deep in the back of his throat and without any further coaxing thrust into me. I broke from his lips to throw my head back as we both cried out. He was wide enough that there should have been more prep-work involved before anything as rough as what we were doing was actually done. He stretched me wide as he thrust into me again. I cried out again, the pain of him shoving so much so fast inside me heightened my pleasure to the point where I couldn't breathe. He stopped moving. 

“Am I hurting you.” I wanted to say yes, but it feels so good! More, please! But I couldn't breathe to speak. I sucked in a shaky inhale and shook my head, leaning into him to breathe in his ear the only thing I could actually say.

“Harder.” His eyes were only a little wide as he pulled back. I swallowed hard before speaking. “I'll tell you if you're hurting me but for the love of the gods just fuck me, Zero!” I nearly screamed the last and he took me at my word. He shoved me back onto the bed using the bounce and the fall to maximum advantage, thrusting so deep and hard inside of me that the pain was almost, almost too much but it wasn't. It danced that fine line between pleasure and pain just right. I screamed for him and dug my fingers into his ass, pulling him into me to reassure him he hadn't hurt me. I wanted him to fuck me as hard as he could while I was still tight enough that the pleasure/pain combo still confused my brain. He gave me just that. 

One second I was lucid enough to think, the next I was lost to the rhythmic pounding of our bodies. Zero moaned and between one thrust and the next my body exploded with pleasure. I raked my nails, that had grown out a little, down his back as the pleasure grew, swelled inside me, filling me up and stretching my skin with the golden glow of orgasm that with one final thrust spilled out of my mouth in one long scream, bowing my spine. Zero cried out above me and his rhythm faltered before he thrust as hard as he could against me sending me spiraling back into oblivion. 

I came out of it breathless and wild with hunger. Hunger for him, all of him. I wanted to feel him thrusting into me as I plunged into him. I shoved his left shoulder and rolled his body so that he stared up at me with a slightly shocked look on his face. I ground and rolled my body above him, dancing him in and out of my body. The look of absolute pleasure on his face, the rapture in his eyes as he watched me was beautiful. His hands found my hips, thrusting up into me as I rode him. He cried out, throwing his head back and just like that I came again, screaming as my body pulsed around his. He cried my name. And I felt the fine tremble in his body beneath mine. I opened my eyes and stared down at him which was my mistake. I saw that wild look in his eyes, the hunger there for me to the very thing I fought not to do. I grabbed a handful of his hair and yanked his body up to mine, he moaned for me and I closed my eyes, fighting the urge to help free the caged beast roaring against the side of his neck. 

“Bite me.” He gasped out. “Bite me! Oh god, Yuki!” “Don't hide from me, Yuki.” His voice played through my mind and something I couldn't begin to explain slipped away from me, replaced by the most profound sense of peace I'd ever felt. Whatever resolve I had left snapped as I plunged my fangs into his neck. His body spasmed fingers ripping through the bed sheets with a nearly meaty sound as he screamed his release. I tasted his orgasm with every pull of my mouth on his throat. His breathing was erratic, fingers digging into my ass, helping me ride him faster and either the endorphins kicked in or he was sensitive, or some combo of the two, because he came again. I tasted a new burst of endorphins in his blood with every mouthful. He screamed and I had to hold him tight so my fangs didn't rip his throat open as his spine tried to bow. His hands gripped me tightly as he came again and again the more I drank from him. My own release came, with no warning, again and his fingers spasmed against my body.

“YUKI!” He screamed my name on one ragged breath. I pulled away from his neck. As soon as my fangs no longer held him captive his body flopped bonelessly back onto the bed. His blood dribbled down from the corner of my mouth as I threw my head back and screamed one final release that made Zero cry out again before I fell on top of him. I couldn't think, move, breathe. Our hearts were loud, racing at nearly the same speed. I struggled to breathe past the meaty hammering of my heart against my ribs. I swear I saw stars behind my closed lids. 

We lay like that for time unknown before I could finally move enough to slide to the side of him. Both of us cried out as our bodies separated where we'd been joined and I had to relearn to breathe again. I recovered before he did, propping myself on my elbow to look down at him through nearly closed lids. He licked his lips and groaned sucking in a deep breath. 

“Holy...fucking...hell!” His voice was rough from all the screaming and he still couldn't open his eyes. I Laughed and wiggled until I could kiss him. Our mouths danced in a lazy rhythm. He turned his head and gasped for air. 

“Need...to breathe...woman.” I laughed again and snuggled down next to him. We both sighed and I remember thinking, I love you, Zero. I don't think I ever said it because the next thing I knew blackness ate my world and I was happy to fall into it with the smell and feel of Zero wrapped around me.

…..................................................

I woke to the delicious smell of midnight lavender on a spring breeze. I smiled as I felt his fingers lightly tracing up and down the fine hairs on my forearm. I was pressed against his back, arm slung over his waist, face snuggled against the soft skin between his shoulder blades. The curve of his ass fit perfectly into the V of my lower stomach and upper thighs. 

“Good evening.” I could hear the smile in his voice. I kissed his back and smiled. 

“Evening. How long have you been awake?” He rolled over to face me and my eyes stung with tears to echo the undiluted joy I saw on his face. 

“A while but I didn't want to wake you.” He kissed my forehead and when he pulled back there was a devious grin stretched across that full, pale pink mouth. Oh boy. I rolled onto my back so that I could see his face without straining my neck.

“Did you know you snore?” I blinked in shock before playfully smacking him on the shoulder, puckering my lower lip out in a mock pout. 

“I do not.” He laughed a loud, completely comfortable, joyous sound I had never heard before he ran his thumb lightly across my lower lip. 

“You do but it isn't loud. It's soft, quiet like a baby snore. It's actually rather adorable.” He leaned in and placed the softest, most chaste kiss on my puckered lower lip. Before he did that I might have protested being called adorable. Then I saw that gleam of joy in his eyes again. He could call me anything he wanted as long as he never stopped looking at me like that. He trailed his fingers over the scar on my lower stomach that he'd so carefully kissed this morning. His face lost some of it's joy, glowing with curiosity instead. I tried to prepare myself for whatever he was about to ask.

“Can I ask where you got this?” He stared patiently down at me from where he was propped on an elbow. 

“A sword fight gone wrong.” He raised an eyebrow.

“I didn't know you were skilled with a sword.”

“I wasn't. Not when I got that scar.”

“And now?” I smiled.

“Maybe you'll have occasion to find out one day.” He frowned for a moment.

“How did you have occasion to even pick up a sword?”

“When it was the weapon of choice in a personal challenge against my authority.” Both eyebrows raised this time.

“They had an anti-vampire weapon?” I nodded. “And still you accepted the challenge?”

“I didn't know at the time that it was an anti-vampire weapon or I would have insisted on them switching the sword for a more mundane weapon.” He seemed to accept that answer, trailing his fingers across the triple spiral puckered just under my sternum. 

“And this one?” 

“Did you know that the Irish are one of the only cultures in the world that have no lore about vampires? None. Not a single myth. The closest they have is ghosts and the faerie world.” 

“Really?” I nodded. 

“They are also a highly superstitious/religious people.”

“And that's where you got this scar?” I nodded again.

“They didn't very much like vampires being on their island, though vampires had in fact been living there for quite some time, they were just impeccably careful. They thought that they might be able to purify my soul so that I might stand a shot in hell at getting past the pearly gates, I'm paraphrasing here of course.”

“So they branded you?” It was a valid question since fire was the only thing other than anti-vampire weapons that if applied thoroughly enough could kill a vampire, and scarred like a bitch. 

“Not exactly. They slowly pushed a hot iron triple spiral into me. Something about the pain being necessary for the cleansing process.” I pointed to where the bottom part of the scar widened, appearing almost like it was smudged. “This is from when they began angling up for my heart.” His eyes were wide.

“They intended to kill you.” I nodded. 

“Well, actually they intended to prep me and then send me on the way for my judgment.”

“Fucking Zealots!” He nearly hissed. I patted his arm and smiled up at him in what I hoped was a soothing way. 

“Yes, they were. Akatsuki and Kaname saved me before they could though.” He nodded, pointing to the perfectly round scar slightly higher and off to the left of the triple spiral. It was about the size of a half dollar. 

“This one?” 

“That is the exit wound for the much larger entry wound on my back.” His eyes widened again.

“What did this?” 

“A very long, sharp, four sided blade.”

“But the wound is circular.”

“They decided to add insult to injury by twisting the blade.” 

“Were you distracted? How did they get your back?” I smiled. 

“You won't like the answer.” He just stared down at me with that ever patient stare. “That blade was not intended for me.”

“Who then?”

“Kaname. He was on his knees, they were about to impale him through the head. I dove forward, shoved him away and took the blade instead.” Emotions flitted across his face like clouds before the sun. Finally he just nodded.

“You really must sit down and tell me some of the stories from your travels sometime.” I laughed.

“Maybe I will but I must warn you in advance, not all of the stories I have to tell are as interesting as the ones detailing how I got my scars.” He smiled and shrugged.

“There are multiple scars running down your back. What are they from?”

“You want to see them.” I could hear the curiosity in his voice so I didn't ask but he nodded as if I had. I just rolled onto my stomach. His breath drew short as he gingerly trailed his fingers across one of the five ragged scars. 

“How? What did this?”

“I was engaged in combat with two others already. The enemy that dealt this wound wore gloves with incredibly sharp claws like that of some large cat. They slaughtered one of our guards before coming at my back.” 

“Who is it? Who did you lose?” I took a breath and held it for a moment before responding. 

“You wouldn't know her.”

“But you did.” I smiled sadly and nodded.

“Kokoro. Her name was Kokoro and had she not died we might have become friends, her and I. She was lovely by every definition of the word.” I laughed abruptly. “Except for in combat. That was the only time she did not smile.” I rolled over so that I faced him and he couldn't ask about any more of the scars on my back. He smiled sadly at me. 

“Don't do that.” I shoved the slew of emotions that tried to rise up back into the box I kept them in. He shook his head and his face was pleasantly blank. His face fell into painful lines as his fingers reached out to hover over, though not touch, the quarter size scar on my right shoulder. My heart squeezed tight for a second and I began pulling back from him until I saw the hurt flash through his eyes and stopped. I thought about getting mad but realized I couldn't. I had shared my pain with him and didn't need to tell him this story. He watched my eyes for a moment before he stared back at the scar on my shoulder. His fingers still hesitated just over it. 

“Why can't I bring myself to touch it?” I couldn't help the tender look on my face as I spoke, sorry that he felt my pain so profoundly.

“I've come to learn that the wounds that hurt the worst are often the ones that leave no physical scar.”

“But there is a scar here. It's physically not a fatal wound but...the loss that accompanies the memory of this scar sure felt fatal.” The tears that had welled in my eyes spilled over as I saw the glassy sheen of compassion in his lavender eyes. 

“Yes. It did.” He didn't say it but he didn't have to. His eyes said it for him. I'm so sorry. He leaned over and I watched as he kissed that shiny, pink wound, for it can hardly be called a scar if the wound never heals. I closed my eyes and swallowed convulsively trying to control the emotional overflow. His arm wrapped around me and he pulled our bodies together, holding me as I silently cried. 

“I'm here, Yuki. It's okay. Cry. I'm here now.” His next words were whispered into my ear. “I'll be right here to put the pieces back together when you're done falling apart.” 

That was all I had wanted for so long, I'd just never let myself admit it. Now as he held me tight it all came crashing in again. All the loss, the blood, the pain, the screaming, the heartbreak. The faces of those I'd lost swam through my mind. The chaos of all those emotions filled me up until I felt like I was going to burst as I wept. Then Akatsuki's face, memories of him flooded through like a perfectly pieced together fucking montage or something. Me holding him as he wept, him holding me as I cried, our mouths feeding from one another, us laughing, his wondrous smile, play fighting, us playing chess, hang-man, checkers, yahtzee, standing up at a karaoke bar singing Bohemian Rhapsody together...all these memories but it was the words he'd uttered in his final moments that shattered me all over again. “Fight, my queen! Fight!” My body quaked against Zero's and through my sobbing I heard him.

“Scream, baby. Just scream.” And just like that five years worth of misery compacted inside my tiny heart poured out of my body in racking sobs, tears and screams. 

I cried until I had nothing left. It was like I had run out of windshield wiper fluid or something...and I was okay with it because even though the ache was still there, and I felt like I could still cry, I felt so much better. When I fell quiet I could hear that Zero was softly humming something but I couldn't figure out what it was. I rolled slightly in his arms so that I could see his face to see that he too had cried, though for him it had been more like shedding a few tears. 

He smiled gently bending down to me. I thought he was going to kiss me but instead he bypassed my lips. I stopped breathing as his so soft lips kissed away my misery. He kissed every drop of my broken heart from my cheeks and still he kissed my skin. Then he nibbled along my jaw and discovered I was ticklish along the soft skin just under the jaw before the neck begins. I squealed and shoved at his chest when he wouldn't abandon my newly found weak spot but his strong arms held me close as he relentlessly nibbled me until I had dissolved into a giggling fit that proved I still had more tears in me. He finally stopped, laughing a rich, pure roll of happiness that made me smile up at him, still breathless from his tickle torture. His face glowed with joy as he placed a soft, chaste kiss on my lips before rolling over so that he was above me. I watched that look of rapture light his eyes again before he spoke. 

“Lets go get sudsy together!” The almost child-like glee in those words made me laugh. I nodded up at him and he grinned, sliding his hands under my ass, cupping it and pulling our bodies together as he lifted me from the bed. I wrapped my legs around his waist and arms around his neck as he moved us towards the bathroom. He turned on the water and stepped into the shower before the water had time to warm. 

“The water isn't-” I didn't get to finish before the cold spray hit my back like an electric thrill down the spine. I squealed and squirmed in his arms to get away from the water. 

“ZERO!” My voice was high-pitched and petulant. Zero was nearly hysterical with laughter as he turned me from the water. I slapped his shoulder.

“What the fuck did you do that for!” He knew the water was cold! He still smiled, but his eyes had darkened as he used his hold on my ass to jack me up higher on his body. 

“For this.” His mouth closed around one of my now very hard nipples, rocking my head back on my spine. I moaned, lacing one of my hands into his hair as his tongue danced across my nipple, teeth gently pulling and nipping at the taught flesh, lips feeding at the soft skin. He suddenly pulled me from his body, setting me down at arms length as I reached for him. He shook his head and laughed, stepping back too. He turned and when he turned back he had a wash cloth and soap in hand. 

“The water is warm now.” He gestured to the spray, inclining his head towards it when I didn't move. I frowned at him, which made him laugh again, as I stepped under the spray. 

I sighed and closed my eyes, basking in the glorious rain of the shower. I opened my eyes to find that Zero was watching me while washing his body in slow circles. Ahhhh...now all was becoming clear. He wanted a show and was going to provide one in exchange. I grinned. I could do that. I turned under the spray so that I could squeeze soap onto my hand, stepping from under the spray, which put me about four inches from Zero, as I raised my arms and began washing my hair. I scrubbed my scalp, watching his face as the first trail of suds made it's way down the side of my neck, slowly trailing across my breast and down my stomach. I smiled as I stepped back under the water. Zero made some small noise as the water and suds began cascading down my body. 

When my hair was soap free I opened my eyes to find Zero completely scrubbed down and soapy. I swallowed hard, balling my hands into fists to keep from reaching out and touching him. I wasn't fully aware of the rules to this game but I was pretty sure that the first person to cave to their desire lost. I applied conditioner and smiled seeing a loofah hanging on a hook under the body wash dispenser. He preferred wash cloths to loofahs. That was fine with me. I was a loofah girl. I took the puffy and soaped it up as I moved around him, gesturing at the shower spray. He laughed as he complied. I turned and my jaw nearly hit the floor as all the air in my body escaped me. The combination of water and soap rolling over all that incredibly pale skin, making it shine in the light was almost too much. He tipped his head back, letting the water pour over him as he ran his hands down the flats of his pecs, fingers dipping and diving slowly across the peaks and valleys of his abs. All this water and my mouth ran dry. How was that possible? 

His hand slid across his hip and I dropped my loofah when he groaned as his fingers wrapped around his very hard cock. His other hand came up and began massaging his balls, very thoroughly removing every ounce of soap. I was so focused on watching his hands that I didn't realize he was watching me watch him until he spoke. 

“It would seem you dropped something.” His voice was husky and deep to accompany the promise of sex in his eyes. 

I swallowed hard and nodded, crouching as I patted around, searching for my loofah without looking away from him. He laughed and turned to get shampoo. Oh, I was so going to lose this game! I shook my head hard and forced myself to look away from him. I don't know what it was about seeing men all naked and dripping wet that turned us women into drooling, slobber-buckets, but damn! Men + water just flat did it for me. If I could figure out the chemistry behind it I'd bottle that shit and sell it. I washed my body the way I usually did, thoroughly, though not nearly as slowly or provocatively as he had. There was no point in me playing this game. I was going to lose anyway. 

I tried to just mind my own business but the lure of Zero and water was too perfect. I looked up and licked my lips as he stood, arms raised over his head, fingers working through his long, thick, silver locks, water shimmering over all that alabaster perfection as the soap swirled down the drain. Ye gods! I finished scrubbing myself quickly as I moved towards him, dropping the loofah as I moved. He opened his eyes and moved his head to look at me. 

“Touching is against the rules.” He grinned as he said it.

“Fuck it. You win.” I slid my hands over the slick expanse of his chest, sliding my body against his. 

I moaned feeling him hard and so ready against my lower stomach. He spun me so that I was under the spray and grabbed a handful of my hair, using it to yank my head back. I gasped, holding my breath as he ran his fingers through all my long hair, washing it clean like he'd done to his. He moved me again so that I was bowed backwards under the spray so that my face wasn't being hit by the water but everything else was. His arm at my lower back steadied me. I felt his hand slide up my inner thigh and my breath hitched, heart nearly stopping when his fingers slid along the outside of me, toying with me ever so gently. His fingers dipped shallowly inside me then up and over my clit in tantalizing circles. I gasped for breath at his gentle, teasing touch, digging my fingers into his shoulders as my breathing quickened. My knees buckled and he effortlessly took my weight, quickening his fingers. That weight of pleasure intensified, getting heavier, heavier, heavier. I cried out, spine bowing against his hold on me as the orgasm swept over me, leaving me limp in his arms. He pulled me close to him, chuckling as he swept my legs up into his arms, carrying me against his chest. I don't know when he'd done it but the water was off. 

“Towels. Need to dry off. Water ruins silk.” He laughed. 

“I believe this silk is a little beyond such worries.” I didn't question him again as he began crawling across the bed to lay me on it. 

He nuzzled my legs apart with his face, sliding his hands up the inside of both thighs until I was spread as wide as I could get. His eyes were locked on my most private of parts, a low moan vibrating up his throat. He rolled his eyes up to mine as he leaned in slowly, so slowly. My heart worked overtime where my lungs failed completely as he flattened his tongue and slowly licked from hole to clit. I shuddered for him and then his mouth moved over me, kissing me like he had my mouth. Not very many men could make oral sex feel like a make out session, but he did. He was all tongue and lips as he explored every inch of me. He licked and sucked every part of me into his mouth until I was nearly mad with the sensual overload, fingers clawing at the bed, searching for anything to hold onto. One second he was kissing me the next his mouth locked around my clit, tongue and lips feeding at it like he was trying to eat me. I cried out and my legs spasmed as the first mini-orgasm swept over me. I was about to beg him for more when between one lick and the next the pleasure exploded, bowing my body off the bed. I threw my head back and screamed his name, thighs trembling beneath his hands as wave after wave of pleasure racked me. It felt like as long as his mouth moved against me I'd just keep coming. When he finally stopped I flopped bonelessly back onto the bed like a puppet whose strings had just been cut. His tongue dove into me and I cried out, writhing as aftershocks coursed through me. He growled and then his mouth was feeding at mine, a sound echo of what he had done between my legs. With the flavor of me on his lips and the orgasm so fresh I moaned as another mini-orgasm came and went. 

“Look at me.” I opened my eyes as far as they would go, which was roughly half-way. He moved back so that I could see down the lines of our bodies, see him lift my hips with a hand under my ass, improving the angle a second before he began to slip inside of me. “Don't look away.”

I made little noises of pleasure, watching as he slid almost painfully slowly inside of me. When he was in as far as he could go we both cried out. He pulled out and then slowly in. He did that a few times before he suddenly switched to a shallow but quick rhythm, hitting that spot close to my entrance. Normally I couldn't get off from that spot but he was wide, so incredibly wide and this was one of those times that proved width could be just as impressive as length. I tried to roll my hips, find a rhythm of my own to match his but his hands gripped my hips, holding me passive. It didn't take long before I raked my nails down his back and screamed my pleasure to the ceiling. I wrapped my legs around his waist, trying to urge him to go faster but he was set on maintaining a slow pace. I was about to protest when he found a new rhythm, one that was slower but deep. He was slow until he was about to bottom out and then he added a little extra oomph and rotation to his hips that managed to hit the spot deep inside me. I cried out as he topped off each thrust, a thicker, headier pleasure filling me drop by drop. The orgasm came out of nowhere, hitting me so suddenly with so much force that Zero groaned as he strained to hold my hips still beneath him. I was still screaming my release when he suddenly switched his rhythm again, this time to an alternating stroke between hard, fast and deep to shallow and quick, switching between the spot deep inside me to the one he'd hit first. The combo sent me flying into another orgasm so that one could hardly be separated from the other. My body bucked and seized beneath him but he wasn't done with me. He reared back, throwing his head back as he shouted and then he let go of his control. He thrust into me hard, harder, harder. His hands on my hips angled me so that every thrust hit that special spot deep inside me that was almost pain. His breath left him on moans, mine leaving me on shouts of pleasure. He threw his head back, mouth wide, fangs gleaming as he screamed, body crashing into mine, showing me that even when I thought he'd lost control he hadn't. I cried out one final release, bucking and clawing at the bed. 

He collapsed over me, barely catching himself in a push up position above me. Instead of pulling out of me and moving to the side he simply grabbed me and rolled so that I laid on his chest, an echo of this morning. We lay there for a while until our world reformed. His fingers trailed lazy circles along my side. I was the one that moved to the side, making us both squirm again as we parted. He rolled onto his side so that I faced his chest, running his fingers through my hair. I smiled at him and I saw in his eyes what I wanted him to say. I wanted him to say it. Please, say it. He opened his mouth. He's going to say it. I just know it! Maybe he would have too, except just then his phone rang. It sounded dull, like it was buried under a crap ton of things. If we didn't have super hearing I doubt either of us would have even heard it. He groaned, kissed me quickly on the lips and rolled three times across the bed, falling over the edge. He thudded onto the floor with a grunt. I erupted into laughter which only got worse when he began cursing under his breath, throwing clothes, shoes, torn blankets and a towel over his shoulder as he rooted around for his phone. The ring tone stopped for only a second before it started again. 

“Aha!” I was still laughing as he flicked open his razor phone. “Yeah?” 

“What time is it?...Oh shit....Good....No. I'm fine....Yes, I'll be in training tomorrow....No, this isn't going to be a regular occurrence....Okay, great. Thanks for the update....Bye.” He snapped the phone shut and stood from his position on the floor to sit on the bed a mile wide grin stretching his face.

“Guess what time it is.” I smiled at him.

“It couldn't possibly be that late in the evening. Maybe...twelve? One at the most?” His grinned widened and my eyes bugged. “Nooooooo...what time is it?!” I sat up as he laughed. 

“It's almost seven-thirty. The sun is about to set...again.” 

“Again?” I looked up at the ceiling as I did mental math, so not my strong suit. “Okay, I left Ruka, Takuma and Hanabusa about an hour after sunrise, so that was like...around seven and you said it's almost seven-thirty and the sun is about to set, again.” I took a moment. “Again?” He nodded. When I finally did the calculations my eyes bugged out. “Nooooo! You couldn't mean-”

“Yep!” He laughed.

“Holy shit!” He was laughing so hard he could only nod. His phone rang again and he had to hand it to me because he was still laughing. I flicked it open without checking the caller ID smiling and shaking my head at him. 

“Hello?” There was a sharp intake of breath on the other end followed by silence. “Heello?” 

“I can't believe he was right.” I frowned. 

“Takuma?” He was quiet, not answering me. I checked the caller ID. Takuma's number wasn't a saved contact in Zero's phone but I recognized the number and new it was his. 

“Oh god, he's going to be pissed.” I don't think I'd ever heard Takuma curse. 

“Takuma what are you talking about?”

“Have you checked the time? Do you know how long you've been gone?” I swallowed hard. 

“Close to thirty-six hours. I should have checked in with someone. I'm-”

“You're damn right you should have checked in with someone! You have no idea, none whatsoever of the-” He cut himself off, an even mix of fear and anger twisting his voice into something I'd never heard from the characteristically easy-going aristocrat. 

“Takuma?” He mumbled something I didn't catch under his breath.

“Kaname is searching the dorm for you. It won't be long now before he finds you and he's going to be pissed. If I were you I'd get Zero out of there. Consider yourself warned.” The phone clicked in my ear and I dropped it on the bed. 

“Fuck.” I mumbled. I looked over at Zero as I sprang to my feet. “Did you hear that?” He nodded.

“Kaname shit-storm coming our way. Do we have an evacuation plan?” Just then someone banged on the door. Zero and I looked at each other. Fuck! I really didn't want him to see us together, especially reeking of sex in the room we'd destroyed. 

“Yeah.” I motioned to the window with my head. “You go out the window.” He raised an eyebrow.

“YUKI!” Yup. That was definitely Kaname at the door. We both looked at the door then back to each other. Zero shrugged. 

“I've heard worse plans.” He began scrambling through the cloth on the floor, searching for his clothes. He shrugged the jacket on but was still fumbling for his pants. I began scrambling around searching for my own clothes. 

“YUKI! OPEN THIS DOOR! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! I CAN SMELL YOU!” I found his Hakama and threw them at him. Zero was stumbling into them as the door quaked and shuddered with the force of Kaname banging on it. 

“OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR!” I whirled to Zero. 

“Go! You have to go! If he sees you right now I'm not sure what he'll do!” Zero threw himself in a roll over the bed, grabbing his phone in his hand. He snatched his sword off the floor, kissed me quick on the lips.

“Be careful!” He was a blur as he moved and was half-way out the window when the door splintered. I crouched and covered my head as the splinters rained down. Kaname waltzed into the room, the heat of his rage preceding him, crawling along my skin. I stood, pulling my shorts up as I did, quickly fastening them. Kaname eyed the movement and the rage in his eyes gleamed. 

“You were with him, weren't you?” I plucked my shirt off the floor, putting it on and buttoning it in record time. I took a deep breath, looking him directly in the eyes while I answered. 

“Why are you asking me when you already know the answer?” His hands balled into fists at his sides and his eyes squeezed tight shut. 

“Say it. I want to hear you say it.” His voice was squeezed tight with rage, quiet, otherwise he'd start yelling. I was familiar with the feeling. I put my hands on my hips and looked at the floor, saying a quick prayer for strength before standing straight and squaring my shoulders. 

“Fine. Yes. I was with Zero.” He stared at me for a moment, speechless I think, before he started to walk into the room. He stopped at the foot of the bed, staring at it as he spoke. 

“I knew I had hurt you and was ready to get on my plane tonight. I gave you your space and, as much as I wanted to, didn't seek you out for fear of what you might say, how you might react.” He scoffed and shook his head. “Then I hear you've been missing since you left our room. Have you any idea how scared I was?”

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I should have-”

“I'm not finished!” He whirled and his eyes were scarlet, face flushed with his rage, a unique feat amongst vampires. “You see, the thing is, this dorm was under a constant perimeter surveillance and no one saw you leave, so you had to be inside somewhere. Then I knew.” He took a step toward me. “I asked after Zero and what do you know? No one had seen him either.” He looked around the room before settling on me again. “I don't know how Cross did it but these rooms are good quality. One-hundred percent sound-proof and mostly smell proof. But I could smell your sex as soon as I rounded the corner. You might be able to fool the ears, but the nose is different.” He made sex sound absolutely filthy. His eyes turned nasty, voice nearly slithering with his rage and disgust. “Did you enjoy fucking him, Yuki? Did it feel good?” I didn't want to hurt him so I didn't answer, which was the wrong response. “DID IT?” I stared unflinchingly into his eyes and let the truth set me free, or damn me to hell. 

“Yeah. It felt good to be with a man that I could just let myself go with. Yes. It felt good to be able to not have to hide myself and just fuck. Satisfied?” My voice was surprisingly calm as I spoke but my heart hurt as I watched Kaname's eyes go wide, frantic with something close to desperation as he flicked his gaze around the room, like he was searching for words. When his eyes settled back on me they were livid. 

“You ran into his arms when you had mine.” He almost vibrated with his rage. “You...WHORE!” He screamed the last at me. My own rage flooded through me so fast I actually stumbled from it. I pointed my finger at him and stepped forward. 

“You don't get to call me that! You are the one who encouraged the sleazy politics. You-”

“You have seen how necessary these 'sleazy politics' are!”

“Yeah. I have. Which is why I can't really hold that over your head.” He lifted his chin and looked down his nose at me. 

“So what else are you going to throw in my face?” 

“How about the three day sexathon you and Ruka went on? Or the six month long affair you two had that only ended when you couldn't keep it up for me! What about the fact that you broke her heart to try and appease me?”

“BUT I DON'T LOVE HER!” I shook my head and smiled sadly at him. 

“That makes it worse.”

“How? How does that make it worse? I don't love her. You don't have to compete for my affection because I love you! But you love Zero, I've competed for your affections since I realized how divided your heart was!” I shook my head and scoffed at him. 

“You may be blind, Kaname, but I am not. You think I don't see the way your eyes follow her? I know you still want her and I have made my peace with the fact that yes, I have your heart but I don't have your body.”

“Then why even bring it up?”

“Because it pisses me off! It is the most frustrating thing I have ever had to deal with!” He shook his head. 

“Yuki-” I held up a hand and shook my head.

“I'm not done, Kaname. You will listen to me now. I have sat by and shared you with politicians and split your affections with another woman for half a fucking year, it's just a cruel twist of fate that it should be Ruka. I never once said anything about your union or the fact that you couldn't get it up for me. I didn't ask you to stop consorting about with her. You made that decision on your own.”

“Yuki-” 

“I said I am not finished, Kaname.” I stopped and glared at him, let him see the rage in my eyes. “I on the other hand have taken only political lovers, never indulging elsewhere. Where do you get off calling me a whore? I'd really like to know.” I waited and I don't think he would have answered if he didn't realize I wasn't going to break first. I could wait here all night if I had to. Patience was one of the virtues taught to me by politics. 

“I was-” He shook his head and scrubbed at his face with his hands. “I let my anger consume me and spoke rashly. I apologize.” I nodded, accepting his apology at face value. People often said things in anger that they didn't mean. He took a step towards me and I held up a hand, stopping him. 

“Apology accepted. However, I have one question I want you to answer.” A look of confusion settled over his face. 

“Shouldn't I be the one asking questions here?” I laughed and shook my head. 

“Unless you want to know what positions we fucked in I'd say your time for asking questions is over.” He seemed to seriously contemplate my words before nodding, face set in hard, angry lines. 

“Ask your question.” It just rolled out of me.

“Why can't you get past my scars? Am I so disfigured that you cannot even bare to see me naked?” His mouth opened and closed several times before he raked his hand through his hair and paced a small circle. I cocked my head as I watched him. He rarely displayed such outward signs of discomfort. I smiled slightly. He stopped. 

“Why do you smile?” I shrugged. 

“You're uncomfortable.” He rolled his shoulders as if trying to ease or shift some tension. 

“Why does that make you smile?” I shrugged again. He shook his head and began pacing again. Maybe his inability to keep an erection grated on him as well. Good. I felt no sympathy for him in that moment. 

“Answer my question, please.” He made some hissing noise and whirled to face me, rage stretching the handsome lines of his face into something fiercely frightening. 

“You will wait.” I raised my eyebrows. 

“I think I have waited long enough.” He shouted in frustration.

“GOD, YUKI! Why are you making this so fucking difficult!?” My anger exploded out from me on a very small wave of magic. 

“JUST ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION, GODDAMMIT!” The hair on his body stood up, even the hair on his head, as my anger literally crackled through the air. 

“Fine! You want to know that every one of the scars on your body marks for me a time when I failed to protect you? Does it make you all warm and tingly inside to know that when I see them I can't stand myself? Is that what you wanted to hear?” I stared at him as he breathed hard from his outburst. “Every one of those marks is my fault!” He fell quiet and stared at the floor while I watched him. I stared at him for so long, thinking. He couldn't get a boner for me because he blamed himself for my scars?

“Say something, Yuki.” His voice was soft with pleading. I blinked in silence at him. What could I say? What was left to say? “Yuki, please. Talk to me.” Now he wanted me to talk to him. I almost laughed but bit it back at the last second. Mustn't poke fun at his wounds. I finally thought of something to say. 

“I have tried to blame you for the things that I've seen, the people we've lost, all the pain and the tears. I have tried, Kaname. Believe me, I've tried.” His eyes welled with tears and I had to look away as my heart clenched tight. I couldn't watch him cry. “But none of this is your fault. You didn't choose this life. I was the one who chose to stay at your side when I picked you. I chose to join you, knowing full well what I was doing. The fault is mine, not yours. It was my decision, not yours. So stop playing that woe is me card because I do not pity you. We're in this shit together so suck it up, buttercup! Stop your whining and bitching because I don't want to hear it. If I can do it why can't you?” His mouth hung open in shock before he closed it. 

“I have lived much longer than you, Yuki. I'm tired.” He shook his head and stared down at the floor and I kind of just wanted to stroll over and slap the piss out of him. The urge was so strong I had to take a step back before I actually did it. 

“You lived for what? Twenty years nearly ten thousand years ago? Yes. Technically you've 'lived' for a long time but you literally slept most of it away. You had ten thousand years of undisturbed slumber. So, nice try, Kaname, but I think it's time you woke the fuck up. Stop being such a mopey dope.” Again his mouth hung open with shock so pure I had to laugh. 

“When did you start speaking so bluntly, Yuki?” I laughed harder. You'd think no one had ever called him on his bullshit before, which was very likely since he was vampire royalty. 

“I've always been kind of blunt, you just never noticed.” Because I'd never needed to talk this way to him until recently. I shook the rest of the laughter off and got serious. “Look, if you want to lay with Ruka I am fine with that. I just ask that you not break her heart when she wears it so openly on her sleeve.” He stared long and hard at me. He turned to face the bed again, staring at it as if he was carrying on a conversation with it that I couldn't hear, before he gingerly sat on the edge of it. 

“Yes, I do still desire her. When I saw her dressed in that costume-” He shook his head and smiled. “Who was she dressed as anyway?” I grinned. 

“I believe she was dressed as Jill Valentine from the fifth game in a series called Resident Evil.”

“Jill Valentine.” He mumbled the name and shivered. “Your idea?” He looked up at me then. I smiled and shook my head. 

“Hers.” His eyebrows raised and the look of incredulity on his face almost set me laughing again. He looked away from me back to the bed. 

“She looked...” He seemed unable to find the words so I helped him. 

“Sinfully sexy?” Even I thought she had looked like a walking, talking wet dream. His head whipped around with a look close to shock. “What? I've tasted my fair share of women since we began this political campaign.” A flash of mischief gleamed in his eyes. 

“Have you...acquired the taste for women, Yuki?” Had I? My first time with a woman was awkward but I didn't recall ever having shied away or hesitated. No. In fact, I could recall a few occasions where I had lusted after the women more than the men and more than once I had found myself watching Ruka as she moved around me for no particular reason. The woman was undeniably sexy. Maybe I had. Or maybe I'd always enjoyed the company of women more than I'd let myself believe, or the occasion for sex had never risen. I shrugged and looked him in the eyes as I answered him. 

“Maybe.” I saw that dark gleam in his eyes spark to life before he averted his gaze back to the bed. 

“Yes, I lust for her. I thought I'd one day be free from this spell but I no longer believe that.”

“Then take her to your bed if she'll allow it.” Though I doubted she would deny him. He fell completely still and contemplated it for so long I thought that maybe he hadn't heard me. Finally he answered me.

“No. I will not take Ruka to my bed.” He stood and faced me. I braced myself for his next words, seeing the determination on his face. “Just as you will not take Zero to your bed again.” I raised an eyebrow at him while my heart stuttered at the thought of never having Zero again. 

“You would damn us both to a life of chastity then?” He frowned.

“We would have each other.” I rolled my eyes and paced to the window. 

“You have not heard what I've said. There can be nothing between us, you desire Ruka and cannot maintain an erection long enough for intercourse to be possible between us. I will no longer shield myself and deny myself the pleasures I deserve.” I heard him move toward me and moved so that I was far away and facing him. 

“I will not have Zero in your bed, Yuki. Do you hear me? This is not negotiable.” The cold edge of anger was leaking back into his voice but my own rage was there to calm me as well. 

“I will not deny my heart what it desires when you would not deny your body it's carnal pleasures, nor did I ever ask you to do so. Why do you ask me to do this?” 

“I do not ask for there is no answer here but mine. I will not share your heart with another man.” My rage spiked and a wind blew through the room that was strong enough that Kaname had to grip the bedpost to regain his balance. I decided in that moment that regardless of what Kaname said there would be no words he could say that would change my mind. If you couldn't stand up for love then what could you stand for?

“I will not be bullied, Kaname. Not by you or anyone else.”

“You can be pissed but you are my wife and on this my decision is final!” He yelled it over the wind ripping through the room. My heart squeezed tight and tears once again burned up the back of my throat. 

“I love you, Kaname. I do. So, I'm asking, please, do not do this.” He shook his head and pushed against the wind, taking several steps forward. 

“I love you too, Yuki. I always have. But just as you will not accept anything less than what you deserve, nor will I, and I deserve to have a wife that loves me, only me.” I bit my lower lip as the first tears streamed down my face and were whipped away into the wind emanating from me. I shook my head. 

“I don't think I can do what you want me to, even if I wanted to. I'm sorry Kaname but I can't.”

“Won't. You won't. What you keep forgetting is that I'm not giving you an option here.” My stomach dropped into my feet and it was beginning to get harder to breathe. 

“Please don't.” The words were a whispered plea that he probably couldn't hear. I knew what he was going to say before he said it. 

“You will finish here at the academy and leave everything behind you, including Zero. If further politics here are required I will attend to them.” I shook my head, my rage and heartbreak helping me square my shoulders as I glared into his eyes. 

“No.” That one word held so much defiance and weight that it echoed on the wind. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth. 

“Yuki, I will do whatever is necessary to guarantee that Zero stays out of your bed.”

“You can take him from my bed, but you can't take him from my heart.” I cocked my head. “But I guess since you can't please me no one else will, huh? Can't have him giving me what you can't, right?” The challenge in my voice rang clear and his face mottled with rage. 

“Yuki, so help me, god-”

“So help you god what? What are you going to do, Kaname? You going to take me from here kicking and screaming?” I narrowed my eyes in open challenge and defiance. “Go ahead and try. I can assure you you'll find I am much harder to subdue now than I was five years ago.” His face crumbled, pain creasing that handsome face.

“Don't make me hurt you. Please don't make me have to hurt you, Yuki.” I could hear the regret in his voice but it was the determination just under it that broke my heart. 

“I'm not making you do anything, Kaname. Everything you do is by your own choice.” He nodded, eyes wide as he stared at the wall just next to me, not meeting my eyes or even looking at me. 

“I am packed and will be leaving the academy before the night is over.” He turned from me, walking toward the door. “I just have to take care of something before I go.” I nodded, though he couldn't see it. He paused in the doorway, looking at me over his shoulder. 

“I love you, Yuki. Remember that.” Those words held so much regret, sadness and an edge of finality like he had made his mind up. I opened my mouth to ask him...ask him what? If this was the last time I saw him? Could I live my life never seeing Kaname again? My heart seized in my chest. 

“Kaname!” I called after him but he was already gone. I ran out into the hallway and at the far end of it I could see Hanabusa and Senri, staring down the long length of carpet and suits of armor at me as if they knew I'd be there. I began jogging towards them, bare feet squishing into the plush carpet. I stopped in front of them.

“Where did he go?” They both pointed down the hallway to their left. Was it a coincidence that the walls were painted a deep red or was I just over analyzing? I was moving before I had time to think about it. 

“Lady Yuki!” Senri called after me. 

“My queen!” Hanabusa this time. I ignored them and kept running. “YUKI!” I stopped dead in my tracks. Hanabusa never called me by just my name. I turned to face him, seeing them both jogging over to me. Busa stopped about three feet back and held my phone out to me. 

“There is a call waiting for you that you'll want to take.” I stared at the phone then shot a glance down the hallway before turning to face him fully. 

“Who is it?” He waggled the phone at me. I growled and snatched it from him. 

“Who is this?” I nearly growled into the phone. 

“Yuki it's me. We have no time for pleasantries.” I frowned.

“Dai?”

“Yes, it's me. Now listen. There is a massive incursion of vampire hunters coming your way and they're coming fast. I'd say you have two hours or less before they're at your gate but they won't knock before entering if you catch my drift.” I nodded even though he couldn't see it. Perfect fucking timing! This couldn't have happened later? 

“How did you get this information?”

“A very reliable informant tipped me off and now I'm extending you the heads up. Whatever you're going to do it has to be fast. Time is not your friend, Yuki.” 

“How many qualifies as a mass incursion?”

“I don't have numbers but from my understanding a small army is about to kick in your front door.”

“Fuck.” 

“Yeah that about sums it up.”

“Thanks for the heads up. I gotta go.” 

“Yes you do.” I was about to hang up when Dai called my name.

“Yuki!” I put the phone back to my ear.

“Yes?” I couldn't help the frustration in my voice.

“Try not to make a mess we can't clean up.” I laughed, a harsh sound.

“I'll do my best.” I hung up before he could say anything else and shoved my phone into my pocket. 

“You both heard that?” They nodded in unison. Good. No need for explanation. 

“Hanabusa, you're in charge of evacuating the students and faculty. Get them out quickly with as little incident as possible. They cannot know what is about to happen. Only use drastic measures if absolutely necessary. I don't care how else you do it, just get it done.” He dipped his head.

“Yes, my queen.” He turned and moved down the hallway at a blur. 

“Senri, you're in charge of informing our people. Make sure everyone is armed and up to speed on what is about to happen. Get a perimeter up and running only around the Star dorm, call all forces to me. We will hold our ground here.”

“Why the Star dorm, my lady?”

“If we are all here they'll be forced to come to us. If this dorm is destroyed that is fine, it would be the more acceptable loss. Find all the emergency exits and make sure everyone knows exactly where they are. If I have to sound the retreat I don't want anyone fumbling for an exit. You have about an hour and a half. Go!” He bowed his head and was gone so fast the backlash of his speed whipped my hair back from my face. I turned and ran down the hallway at full tilt, so when Ruka came around the next corner I had to jump to the side to avoid crashing into her at warp speed which sent me into the wall and she slid to a stop so fast she wound up on her ass. I hugged the legs of a giant suit of armor to steady it and keep it from falling over from my impact with the wall next to it. And this is exactly why that old cliché of not running in the halls would always be in effect. 

“Yuki, I just heard. What do you want me to do?” Wow. That was fast. It looks like I picked the right man for the job, though my choices had been slim, Senri worked fast just as I'd told him. I liked that. I righted myself, noting the slight smirk peeking at the corners of her mouth. Admittedly, my collision was kind of funny, given the circumstances. 

“We need to get Kaname out of here. Right now.”

“And you?” I shook my head. 

“This is my academy and my people I will not abandon them to die for a ship without it's captain.” Of course the academy was more a political project for me but I had many fond memories here. My father though did captain this ship and I wouldn't see it sink without a fight. 

“But-” I shook my head, holding a hand up for silence. 

“No. Ruka, I have made my decision. I'm staying, but Kaname cannot. If one of us falls the other may still carry on. If we are both here we could very well both perish. I cannot allow that.” She analyzed me with wide eyes and if those gorgeous orbs seemed a little watery I'd just attribute it to the chaos of the situation. She bowed her head, a deep, neck bending motion. When she lifted her head her face was set into the stern lines of business casual. 

“I will follow you, my lady.” I smiled and turned to begin running down the hallway again. Then I realized I had no idea where I was going. It wasn't like Kaname had told me where he was going. I stopped at the next hallway intersection looking first left, then right. Would he have gone back to his room? 

“You don't know where he is.” Ruka didn't bother asking and I didn't bother lying, let alone answering. 

I was about to turn down the left corridor when my skin erupted in goose bumps with the feeling of magic crawling along it. Kaname's magic. I didn't question it I just turned and ran down the opposite hallway. I ran as if the earth itself gave me speed. Ruka kept up, stumbling only once. We were both breathless as I threw the door open and froze as Zero's scream sent my heart into my throat. The magic in this room was so thick it left no room for air and my lungs burned in rebellion. Zero was on his knees, a purple aura around his head where Kaname's hands held him. Kaname had his head tipped back, eyes closed, face furrowed in concentration. “I will do whatever is necessary to guarantee that Zero stays out of your bed.” I suddenly knew exactly what he was doing and my emotions exploded, swirling inside me like a kaleidoscope of chaos so that one was nearly inseparable from the next. 

“KANAME, NOOOOO!” I moved without thinking. I moved faster than you'd be able to blink, planting my hands into his side and shoving. He was airborne and crashing into the wall across the room as I fell to my knees, catching Zero in my arms as he began to fall to the floor. His body was limp in my arms. I squeezed him tight to my chest, rocking him. 

“Zero? Zero, look at me. Please open your eyes.” My chest constricted, lungs burning. My vision blurred as I stared down at the man in my arms. “Please.” It came out as a whisper. Zero's eyes flared open as wide as his mouth as he sucked in a huge lungful of air, spine bowing, hands gripping my upper arm in a painful death grip. I laughed, tears cascading down my face as I pulled him closer. His eyes locking on mine, face desperate. His mouth moved and I think he was trying to tell me something but I couldn't comprehend it. A single tear slipped from the corner of that lavender eye before he threw his head back and screamed. I knew that scream, was familiar with the way heartbreak carried on such a sound. Once you've heard that sound you'll never mistake it for anything else. His eyes rolled back into his head and then he fell unconscious. The room was silent except for my tears and quiet sobbing. I gently laid him down on the floor, running my fingers through his hair, staring at the peaceful, blankness of that face that had haunted my dreams, plagued my conscious. I leaned in and placed a chaste but lingering kiss on the soft, pink fullness of his lips that only a little earlier had so lovingly kissed me back. I stood, still staring down at him. 

“Did you just do what I think you did?” I could hear Kaname swallow from where I was. 

“Yes.” My voice was squeezed tight and low with the virulence of my emotion as I spoke and every word sounded dangerous.

“What did you take?” He was quiet for a moment before answering. I stared down at Zero, refusing to look away. Peaceful. He looked so peaceful. 

“I can't steal or hide emotions but-”

“What did you take, Kaname?” I was pretty sure I knew what he'd taken but I needed to know for sure. I needed to hear him say it. 

“I took his memories of you.” The world spun off it's axis and my heart broke, it's broken pieces falling into my stomach. 

“How?” I almost choked on the word. 

“I asked you not to make me do this. I didn't want to hurt you. You-”

“HOW!?” There were so many memories between the two of us. How could you take away ten years of memories? How was it possible to delete someone from a person's brain?

“I substituted your presence in his memory with another, completely erased the last three days from his mind...”

“And?” He sighed. 

“And he might believe that the woman he loved was murdered by a level E.” I whipped my head up and looked at him with wide eyes, actually staggering a step from the news. He had not only taken my Zero from me but had killed this imaginary love he'd replaced me with, giving him nothing but more grief to fuel the rage of his hatred for vampires. 

“Undo it. Right now! Bring your ass back over here, lay on hands and undo this!” He shook his head slowly, face a tight blankness. 

“Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. Once done I can't undo it. If it is to be undone only he can do it, but I doubt he'll want to.” No. He wouldn't. He wouldn't want anything to do with me or any other vampire. 

“Have you any idea what you've done?” The panic in my voice was thick enough to walk on. He took a step toward me, hand outstretched. “Dont!” He froze and my rage roared through me. “HAVE YOU ANY IDEA WHAT YOU JUST DID!?” I screamed at him, a roar of sound that made him take back the step. He dipped his head, not taking his eyes off me. 

“I asked you, begged you. You wouldn't hear it. I told you I'd do anything to keep him from your bed. I meant it.” His eyes flicked down to the man at my feet and I wanted to scream at him to look away, that he didn't deserve to look at Zero. “This way he'll never come to your bed again. He'll never come to any vampires bed again.” I stared back down at Zero and my heart broke again. Kaname had stolen his happiness and replaced it with a life of hatred and grief. I tried to imagine never seeing him smile again and realized I'd do anything to see him happy. 

“Undo it. Please, undo it. I'll leave. I'll leave it all and never come back. Take it back! Just take it back! Please, Kaname just take it back! Please-” My words cracked under the weight of desperation and heartbreak, tears pouring down my face until I nearly choked on them. As painful as it was to imagine a life without Zero I would. I would leave the entirety of Japan behind me if Zero could get his heart back because sure as I breathed now that was exactly what Kaname had stolen. You can't live without a heart and I wanted more than anything for Zero to live, really live. The pain on Kaname's face was real and it really pissed me off. 

“I know you mean that. I can hear your heart breaking and I'm so, so sorry, but I can't.” I was blind and deaf to the world around me as my world spun out of control, coming to a screaming halt somewhere I'd never thought to return. I moved in a blur, not thinking just letting my emotions drive the bus. I don't really remember touching him but Kaname was suddenly flying across the room. He hit the wall beside the door so hard I could see the hallway through the hole in the plaster, the metal beam beneath bent, the crack from his impact trailing from floor to ceiling. I stalked toward him, swaying to the tune of my anger. I hated him. He'd hurt me. Worse, he'd hurt my Zero, stolen him from me. Never again. I smiled at those sweet words as they danced through my mind. 

Kaname groaned as he rolled onto his feet. His eyes widened when he saw me coming for him a second before I bounced him off that bent support beam again, snatching him by the throat with my left hand and slamming him into it once more, decking him with my right hand. I hit him three times, faster than you could breathe before letting him go and uppercutting him. His head rocked back and slammed into the beam as I planted a side kick in his chest that sent him through the beam, spiraling across the hallway to crash into yet another wall. I don't remember moving through the wall but I must have because I suddenly had him by the throat up against the wall dangling two feet from the floor. I was floating again. Huh, imagine that. His lip was busted open and torn, probably from his own fangs. His eye was swollen the white of it shot through with red where I'd busted some blood vessels. His hands gripped my wrist. 

“Yuki-” I slammed him into the wall hard enough that his eyes rolled into his head from the impact before using my unnatural strength to throw him into the floor beneath us. A suit of armor toppled on top of him. Which he clumsily brushed away as he struggled to pull himself away from me. I watched him from where I levitated on a wind of my own creation as he slowly stumbled to his feet. He propped himself against the wall behind him, slightly hunched in on himself. I dropped back to the floor in a crouch. He shook his head then winced.

“I won't fight you, Yuki.” His voice was thick with the blood pouring from the corners of his mouth. I smiled. That was fine with me. 

“Then you'll die.” And in that moment I knew without a single doubt that I would kill him. I palmed the fallen sword dropped from the suit of armor and ran him through before he could fully comprehend what I'd just said. I shoved the sword into him, through the wall until the hilt dug into his flesh. I somersaulted backwards landing once again in a crouch, staring at him as he gasped for breath. His feet dangled several inches off the floor, hands gripping the hilt as if he could pull the sword from his own chest cavity. He could, but it was physically impossible for him to do it in a single motion. The sword was unrealistically long and unwieldy so even if he did choose to yank it out the process would be incredibly painful. He thumped his head back into the wall, closing his eyes, pain twisting his face as blood poured down his body. I had impaled him only inches away from his heart so I knew he was badly wounded. 

“Can't...kill me...” He gurgled around his own blood. He cried out as he pulled on the sword, moving it marginally. I grinned and knew from the look on his face that it was a thing of nightmares. 

“I guess I'll enjoy trying then, won't I?” I grabbed a piece of the fallen armor and tore it until it was a flat, torn hunk of metal. His eyes widened right before I threw it at him, burying the thing so far into his shoulder that only a small piece of it protruded. He cried out. I stood and was swaying towards him when Ruka suddenly appeared in my path. She held her arms out to either side as if she would bar my way. I cocked my head at her, a curious look stretching my face. 

“You would stand in my way? For him?” She swallowed hard and nodded. I could see the fear in her eyes but I could also see determination...love. 

“I would stand in your way for you. If you do happen to kill him you would be hunted till death for regicide. Everyone would be searching for you. Your own guards, us, your friends and allies might have to kill you.” Tears of her own trailed down her face and I realized she had been crying for some time now. “Please, please don't make us have to do that.” Her plea was soft but heartfelt. 

I wondered if she was really crying for me or for the man she loved possibly falling by my hand. That thought stopped me. “...any act of murder starts a vicious cycle of vengeance that might never end. They killed Shizuka's love so she killed the ones I loved and in turn I killed countless others who at one time or another had people who loved them. It never ends. One day I'll kill the wrong person and someone they love will claim my life in vengeance.” Zero's words stopped me. If I killed Kaname because he'd stolen Zero from me then Ruka might have to kill me, either because I killed the man she loved or because duty required her. Then one day someone else might kill her for killing me or somebody she was commanded to kill because I wasn't here to command her otherwise. A vicious cycle indeed. How could I do to Ruka the very same thing Kaname had done to me? I walked towards her and she stood her ground. I smelled and tasted her fear, heard her heart racing, saw it in her eyes and still she stood her ground. I stopped just in front of her. Her bravery astounded me. I admired her for it. I placed a hand upon her cheek and tears softly flowed down my face once again. 

“I pray that one day, when I need it the most, my bravery will stand as boldly by my side as yours.” I smiled sadly at her before leaning in and placing a lingering kiss on the opposite cheek. I felt her body relax marginally, smelled the gratitude coming off her in waves. I stared into her eyes and minutely, almost imperceptibly dipped my head before moving around her. I grabbed the sword hilt sticking out of Kaname and wrenched it, twisting it as far as my wrist would turn. He cried out then gasped sharply as I ripped it free of him and the wall. He fell to the floor in a bloody heap. I turned from him, took a deep breath, closing my eyes while I just took a moment to breathe. 

When I opened my eyes I scanned the hallway and wasn't surprised to see we had a small audience. Hanabusa's eyes were wide as he stared at me. Takuma and Senri's faces were difficult to read but it was the slight smirk at the corner of Takuma's mouth that intrigued me. Behind them stood Rima, face twisted in outrage and anger. To the other side of me stood about six of the newer guards, the names of which I didn't remember except for one. Twister, we didn't know his real name, was staring at me with an openly, pleasantly amused look on his face, arms crossed, casually propped against the wall as if watching his queen beat the shit out of the king was a common occurrence. I turned away from them all back to Kaname. He was pushing his hands against the hole I'd left in his chest, trying to staunch the blood flow. I crouched next to him, sword still in hand and felt an icy calm settle over me. 

“You have destroyed the life of one of my longest standing friends, broke my heart and hurt me in ways that no amount of physical pain I could dish out would ever compare to.” He stared at me, face contorted in pain but he wasn't as hurt as what I wished him to be. 

“I'm...sorry, Yuki. I'd...take it...back if I...could.” His voice was thick and he coughed hard enough that he had to lean over to spit a large mouthful of blood onto the floor. Did I feel guilty? Not one fucking bit. 

“You have made it abundantly clear that there is no fixing what you have broken. So, allow me to finish breaking it.” He rolled his head to face me as I spoke, eyes filling with tears that no longer moved me. I felt not a twinge of emotion in the wintry stillness inside me. “You really should appreciate Ruka more. She saved your life this day because make no mistake, if she had not stopped me I would have taken you apart piece by piece, again and again if I had to until you couldn't possibly come back again.” His eyes flicked to the woman behind me for a moment before settling back on me, true terror in those honey-brown eyes. 

“I will never forgive you for what you have done today, so don't waste my time asking for my forgiveness, for you'll never get it.” He swallowed hard, looked away and nodded once. “You have hurt me for the final time. Kaname Kuran you will leave this academy as soon as I finish with you and never return. You are not welcome and have no place here anymore, nor do I have a place for you in my heart any longer.” His gaze jerked to mine, shock, horror, heartbreak and a slew of other emotions plain on his face but I no longer cared. When he saw this the tears came faster. “I hereby release you from my bed. You are free to pursue whomever you wish, as will I. I will, if you desire, remain your queen in title and status only. If you find another whom you would wish rule beside you I will step down and afford you that right. However, should that be your decision I will demand a...demonstration, the nature of which I have not yet decided, to prove she is a worthy successor.”

“Yuki, I-” 

“I will, as previously stated, confer with you on matters of great political significance and stand by your side when required, strictly for political purposes. Other than that you will maintain your distance.”

“Yuki-”

“You have broken my heart and my trust as a partner and lover. However you have remained ever faithful and true in your role as Lord of the vampires, forever acting in the best interest of your people. I 7have always both admired and respected that about you.” I stared into his eyes and let him see the truth behind my words. “If this ever ceases to be true no treaty, alliance, army or power, not even the gods themselves will be able to save you from my wrath. Break my trust again Kaname and I will dance in your blood before I see the fire leave your eyes. This I swear, consequences be damned.” My words were cold, ringing with finality. As I stood I swear I heard what sounded like a gear shifting, as if the world was resettling after my declaration. Whatever happened after this moment was going to be affected by the decisions made this night. Kaname curled on the floor around his wound and I turned my back on the soft sobs of his misery. 

“Please. Don't do this, Yuki.” I spoke without turning to face him, eyes locked on the crying face of my father. 

“You have damned yourself to this fate Kaname.” With that I walked down the hallway, stopping ten feet back from the people I'd come to know best these last five years. I didn't even need to motion or speak, the guards on the other side of the hallway simply moved past me, standing among Busa, Takuma, Rima, Senri and my father. I looked at them all. 

“We have much to do this night. I will not command any of you to stay or go. If you choose to go with Kaname I will hold no ill will against you. Knowing what is coming our way I might run if I were you too. You may run this night with the full blessing of your Lady.” Some of them shuffled but they all stared at me, waiting. “If you choose to stay however I will demand your loyalty and probably ask of you things you have never dreamed. It will be a very long, bloody, windy fucking ride and I will do my absolute best to ensure that each and every one of you makes it through with me.” I looked at the ground as I spoke my next words. 

“I, and those who have been with me this far, have lost a great many friends and allies, and this is just the beginning. I ask that before you decide to stay you understand, I will not be able to save you all. Some of you will die on me.” A single tear crept down my cheek as I looked up at them, taking in one face at a time as I said, “Hear me when I tell you, you might die. I cannot promise you safety and I do not make promises I cannot keep. I can promise that, our enemies will either fall under our persuasion...or they will die. There is no middle ground in this war. They are with us or they are against us and anyone who steps into our path will be cut down. No matter if you choose to go with Kaname or stay with me your purpose will remain the same. Choose and do it now before death kicks in our front gates.” There was a profound silence in the hallway and everyone's eyes were on me. 

As far as speeches go I probably could have done better but I couldn't have been more honest. I almost wanted to say something pretty, something motivational but I didn't. I didn't think I had pretty and inspirational in me tonight. I waited, waited for them to tell me to fuck off, to give a battle cry, to walk or run away, waited for anything. I was surprised when Ruka was the one to walk around me from where she'd stood where I'd left her. She stopped about two feet from me, drew her dagger from her belt, curling it in her fist, putting it over her heart and bowing her head before going down on one knee before me. Hanabusa and Takuma moved almost as one drawing their swords from their belts, putting them to their heart, bowing their heads and kneeling. The rest of them followed suit until everyone before me knelt with fist and weapon pressed to their heart on one knee before me. My eyes stung with tears as finally even my father, with a smile stretching that wide mouth, fell to one knee, head bowed, hand to his heart. I was speechless as I looked at them like that. Alright. Now what? That annoying little voice in my head did an excellent job at pointing its finger and laughing at my ignorance. What was I supposed to do now? 

“Which of you will take Kaname from Japan and stand by his side as protector?” They all lifted their heads and stared at me. I waited and Rima and several of the nameless newer faces stood. Rima stared down at Senri where he knelt still and he stared back. She wanted him to stand with her, even I saw that, but he stayed kneeling. She nodded at him and when she turned to face me her eyes sparkled with unshed tears. Two more stood and looked to me, waiting for an order. I sighed, pursed my lips and nodded at them. 

“The six of you are now Kaname's personal guard and escort until or if he decides to appoint others to the task. Right now you are to do anything you have to in order to get him to safety outside of Japan. You will follow this order and only upon it's completion will you then begin operating under Kaname's orders. Until then you listen to me.” They all nodded. “Go now. Move swiftly and carefully. Take anyone with you that wishes to go. Do not let Kaname fall!” They nodded and hurried past me. I heard Kaname groan in pain. 

“Yuki?” His voice was rough but sounded much better than it had. Damn, what a shame. I ignored him and stared at the faces left before me, particularly Takuma's. He had stood by Kaname's side for thousands of years. Why now had he chosen to leave his friend behind? I'd ask later. 

“I'd swear that I gave you all tasks to do.” Busa and Senri stood, bowed their heads and ran off together with a backlash of wind. Ruka and Takuma were all that were left before me, the others having left to escort the royal escort to avoid any incident. 

“Yuki!” Again I ignored him. “Takuma?” I watched something flinch through the depths of those forest green eyes and once again wanted to know why he had chosen to stay. “Takuma?” There was twining threads of confusion, desperation and hurt when Kaname cried out for his friend. Takuma visibly flinched. 

“Rima.” Takuma's voice was loud without being a shout. She stopped and turned to face him. He stood and turned from me to face her in return. 

“Watch out for him, okay?” She frowned at him for a second before nodding. 

“I will do my best.” He turned back to me as she made her way down the hall. I watched the six of them move at a rapid pace, two of them holding Kaname's weight between them as they ran, until they disappeared from sight. 

“What would you have of us, my queen?” Takuma asked without a hint of irony. The answer was immediate. 

“You will stay by my side for now.” I was the Lady of the vampires and even though I would be leading from the front lines I knew now that risking myself the way I had been was foolish. I would take only those I trusted with me into battle but I would take them. I looked to my father who was smiling at me. 

“So, you and Kaname hit a rough patch, eh?” My eyes widened, eyebrows raising and the way he so casually said it first frustrated then amused me. A rough patch. My lips widened into a smile that he echoed and then I laughed so hard I once again was in tears. I stood up, wiping my tears away as I tackle hugged him. He made a startled noise before wrapping his arms around me. I had needed that laugh. I pulled back from my father with a smile on my face, turning to Takuma. 

“Your task is to take Zero to my old room in the headmaster's quarters and watch over him. Guard him and care for him.” I swallowed hard and closed my eyes taking a deep breath before I spoke again. “When he wakes up he might be wild, dangerously so. If he attacks you I want you to subdue him or knock him out and restrain him if possible. If not run. Do not let him kill you. Do you hear me, Takuma?” He opened his mouth and looked as if for a moment he might protest. I watched his mouth slowly close as his eyes searched mine. Whatever he saw there must have reassured him in some way because all hint of rebellion disappeared. He nodded. 

“As you wish, my queen.” Is what his mouth said, but his eyes said that he knew I trusted Ruka with my body but I'd trusted him with my heart even if it was shattered. It was a gamble on trust he had not yet earned but I could think of no better way to test his loyalty. Besides, I knew and trusted Ruka by my side in battle and the look in Takuma's eyes told me I had not misplaced my trust in him. I watched Takuma turn from me and disappear into the room I had destroyed. I stared at the doorway until he appeared again, Zero cradled solidly in his arms against his chest. My heart clenched at the sight of my Zero like that. 

“I will not fail you, my queen.” He bowed as deeply as he could with the other man in his arms before running down the hallway. We all watched them go before I turned to face my father. I saw painted on his face a million things he wanted to say with no time to say them.

“Do you wish me to get my sword and fight beside you?” I looked into his eyes seeing there what his voice did not betray, regret and sadness. He had given up the sword when he'd founded Cross academy in order to fulfill my mother's dream of a school for both vampire and human. As far as I knew there had only been one occasion since he became headmaster in which he had temporarily forsaken that oath. He did not wish to fight, but he would, for me. All I had to do was say yes and the vampire without fangs, the greatest vampire the world had ever known would be on my side. I shook my head and smiled at him. I would not have him forsake his oath again if I could help it. He smiled back.

“So, what now?” Just then an explosion sounded in the distance, probably the front gate being blown to shit, and my smile shifted from the warmth I'd offered him into a reflection of the icy calm inside me with a much darker twist. 

“Now, you go and make sure your students and faculty are safely off campus.” Yes, I was aware my attempt to get my father to safety was painfully apparent. I didn't care. I'd lost enough for one day. “I get to go fend off a siege.” He shifted uncomfortably at the grin on my face that accompanied the words before running down the hallway at full speed, which was still impressive even if it wasn't vampire speed. I watched him round the corner, turning around to find Ruka waiting for me. I smiled devilishly at her. 

“Let's go kill some fools.” She swallowed hard and nodded. My day had gone to hell in a flaming fucking hand-basket, but Zero and my father were safe...and I got to go on a killing spree. Things were looking up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N- Holy crap. This chapter was a roller coaster of emotions. I cried, laughed, got pissed off and wanted to punch things and damn near thought I was having a heart attack at times but here it is...oh, the wonders of writing! I am sorry for those of you who are Kaname fans. I kind of destroyed him in this chapter but my heart goes out to Zero (and my girl Yuki of course). I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and hope to hear some feedback from you! 
> 
> I will answer any questions, if there are any and if I can (without spoiling the plot), that are asked in reviews probably prior to the next update. Review the chapter to talk to me, otherwise, I'll see you next chapter! Ta-ta for now, lovelies! ;-D


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